#... sorry.

There was this one time we went into an abandoned castle to collect the shards since we heard rumors of "living armor that haunts the castle", we knew it was another case of humans causing problems using their big ol' hubris. The castle was OLD, like the draw bridge was on the cusp of falling apart probably because of all the slashing and damage on the inner part of it, definitely caused by the armor for whatever reason. When we walked across that bridge... You know that feeling of kinda... Wanting to fall off a high place even though you're terrified? I felt that, I felt that hard. It wasn't a thought I needed to have especially at a time like that. I clung onto Rose because I didn't trust myself to not do it. We went into the castle and... Nothing, it just looked like a regular ol' abandoned castle from the medieval era, a few torn portraits and artifacts here and there, carpeting, the weird part is all the damage on the walls and floors that clearly came from scratching metal and aggressively hitting weapons against it. When we noticed them, we heard the echoes of banging metal, it sounded big... Not regular armor, or atleast not human armor. It took a while to look for them, or should I say... It? Stars, it was terrifying! We almost didn't recognize it as armor at first but when we got a proper look when it chased us up the top floor, the armor had fused together into one... Thing?? It was a giant mess of metal limbs and weapons, the shards were inside it and we had to destroy this thing quickly, and we did it in the only way we could. Sardonyx. Just, the only way to destroy it was a giant hammer and grabbing the shards before they could reform one way or another. Again, retrieving shards from armor was super annoying. And uh, the thing it, Sardonyx destroyed the whole castle with that hammer of hers, which is one of the reasons I don't like giant hammer's as a weapon.

... you know, I thought this would make for a better story than it actually does. Like, possessed armor that fused together to make a giant armor monster? How cool is that? But really... It was just... A much bigger mess than it needed to be. Humans can be so... Dumb, just big ol' idiots. They think they found a solution and next thing they know that solution is murdering the people it was supposed to protect, and... I don't know... I'm just not feeling that okay lately.

He did it before. He can do it again. He was here for a while. You all saw it. John was alright. He spoke to us. I don't care how powerful Combine technology is. You can't just erase a person.

Either way, who the fuck are you people to decide for us what to do? He's not your brother. He's not your father. He's not your close friend. Though, I'm sure he would consider anybody a friend with how kind he is.

Don't try to make this desicion for us. Also— if you're so insistant on him being dead, why aren't you being a little more sensitive towards the people this directly effects? I've been a bit numb to it all, I'll admit. It's been hard for me to get genuinely upset at things like I used to. It doesn't mean other people aren't upset, though.

Shuichi: