#*poem

Pass my love.

consider: it's late in the night, you're at the edge of the rooftop breathing in his cigarette smoke, and nothing is okay. you're on a schedule and time is ticking and how many more nights like this do you have left? how many more nights will you get to breathe this easy before your shadows catch up to you? he tells you he hates you. with what you're doing to him, he should. it's a far drop down if he pushes you. consider: it's late in the night, you're officially out of time like you always knew you would be, and nothing is okay. he's standing there thinking that you'll go back, he'll drink, you'll burn a cigarette, he'll remind you just how much he hates you. but you don't get to tell him all that's over. you can only hope he gets the message as you disappear. you can only hope, for the first time in your life, that someone will care enough to miss you. was it the inevitability of this that hurt most? the knowledge that one day you'd lose the first real family you ever had? maybe it would've been better if he'd just pushed you.  easier. something sudden would've ached less than the waiting. consider: it's late in the night, you've spilled all the secrets that nearly chased you into your grave, and things might turn out to be okay. one day you'll figure out how to breathe again, somewhere between the cigarette smoke and his heart beating against yours. you'll figure out how to separate the lies from your real life. you'll learn how to talk about it. there will be time.

COWARD (cow·ard ; /ˈkou(ə)rd/) n. 1. a person who lacks courage 2. a person who lacks the ability to stick up for himself 3. a person who lacks even a single morsel of bravery to face a monster as opposed to following along with every single thing he does like he’s your leader or your king, like this is some kind of goddamn cult or something 4. a person who lacks the guts to face the truth that the queen will always triumph

Radical Infatuation by me