#*myfanfic

When Randy hears the jingling of keys outside of his hotel door, and finally the beep of the key card being accepted his heart starts beating wildly inside of his chest. His fingers shake against the plate he's holding, and his eyes are locked on the chocolate cake on top of it; making sure it doesn't end up on the floor because of his shaky grip.

When the door opens and Dean casually enters the room, Randy smiles yelling out "Happy birthday love!" and steps towards Dean so he can get a good look at the cake he'd spent the past few hours baking.

Dean almost looks mortified, dropping his bag aside and just staring at Randy. He glances around the room, probably looking at the excessive balloons and party streamers thrown around. He squeezes his eyes shut, letting out a deep sigh followed by an angry groan.

He doesn't even speak before turning his back and slamming the door behind him, leaving Randy stunned. He can hear Dean muttering to himself as his stomps fade out down the hotel hallway.

It takes Randy a few seconds to process that his little surprise went in the worst direction possible. He sets the cake aside and hurries out the door trying to follow after Dean, who was already long gone.

Randy returned to their hotel room, cleaning up the small party mess he'd made and stuck the cake in the microwave. Bummed out was an understatement, he feels as though he'd had his heart torn out and stomped all over.

He'd put so much thought and preparation into this night, he'd planned it all out in a million different ways. He just wanted his boyfriend to have one proper birthday surprise, and despite all the times Dean told him not to surprise him he figured he wouldn't totally hate it. But he was wrong.

Randy dragged himself into bed after waiting around for Dean to come back. He figured he'll make it back on his own. And the last thing Randy wants is to push Dean any further, he's having what Randy calls a 'mood' and he'll recover, hopefully. 

Randy's reading a book when the hotel door clicks open and Dean pokes in quietly, expecting Randy to be asleep by now. Randy just sends him a look and focus's on his book, there's no words for him to say. He knows if he opens his mouth he might say something wrong and send Dean into another mood. 

Dean shuffles around a little bit before stripping into his boxers and getting comfortable next to Randy. There's an awkward tension in the room that the two are trying to ignore. 

Randy's not mad at Dean, but he's disappointed that he just ran off like that. He'd thought they worked out a system where they'd address each problem and work it out together. 

Dean snuggled up against Randy and pulled the book out of his hands, folding the page over and setting it aside. He pulled Randy's arm around him and rested his head on his chest hearing his steady heart beat.

"Sorry 'bout earlier. Jus' thought you knew I really don't like surprises." Dean began, locking his hand with Randy's

"I didn't think it was anything big. Just dinner and some proper birthday decorations." Randy mumbled, fumbling with Dean's cold fingers.

"Nobody's ever done anything nice for me, so it just caught me off guard I guess. Didn't really know how to react and my first instinct was to take off..." Dean continued, sadness and regret evident in his tone.

"But did you even consider how that'd make me feel? I spent weeks planning tonight and hours putting it all together." Randy began getting aggravated, but he knew not to lose his cool. He doesn't want to ruin the night anymore.

Dean rolled onto his stomach so he was looking at Randy's face, resting his chin on his knuckles. "I know, and 'm sorry. I jus' feel so guilty, I didn't do anything for your birthday. Kinda' forgot about it til you said somethin'... Didn't even buy you a card. N' you've got this cake and all these balloons. I couldn't accept it." 

"I didn't wan't you to do anything for me, and if you didn't want to that's okay. But I wanted to do this for you." Randy smiled weakly, hating the sad look that had grown in Dean's eyes.

Dean sucked in a deep breath. "I hate that 'm like this, I shouldn't have taken off. Prolly' made you feel like shit." His voice began to shake as he tried to keep his composure, not wanting to burst out into anymore tears.

Randy's fingers glided along Dean's face realizing how close he was to another breakdown. "It's okay, Dean. I should have talked to you first, I know how you feel about birthdays." 

"Yeah... Just another day... B-but that cake you made, looked real good. Where can I find it?" Dean smiled, trying to change the subject and lighten the mood a little as he got to his knees ready to burst off of the bed and find that chocolate cake.

Randy laughed, "In the microwave." 

Randy gets comfortable in his seat next to Dean. It takes him a few minutes to notice Dean’s long silence and his leg shaking wildly with anxiety.

"Hey, what’s wrong?" Randy asks.

"N-nothing. Just don’t like flying, s’all." Dean lies, there’s a lot more to it than that.

"You’ve been in this business over two years, you’ve spent most of your career in an airplane. What’s up?" Randy asks, narrowing his eyes on Deans whose making his best attempt to avoid the eye contact.

There’s a silence as Dean focus’s on the window as the plane slowly begins to ride down the runway. He can feel his heart begin to race inside of his chest and his skin tingle with fear.

Randy’s hand meets Dean’s thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze. They just recently declared themselves a couple, and even though they’d been together for months already they still hadn’t got used to doing things as a couple.

"I had a bad dream ‘bout flying. Jus’ a little paranoid…" Dean mumbles.

A tiny grin grows across Randy’s face that he can’t hide. ‘Dean Ambrose, the guy that puts his body on the line every single night is afraid of a little dream’. He thinks to himself

"It’s okay, I won’t let anything happen. Promise." Randy says, as he grabs a hold of Dean’s hand, pulling it onto his lap and rubbing his thumb along Dean’s rough knuckles.

There’s a little jolt of electricity that shoots up Dean’s arm, surprising him. And all of a sudden all of that worry and paranoia is gone, and he forgets the nightmare he’d had about flying last night.

"How’d you do that?" Dean asks, finally connecting his gaze to Randy’s.

"Do what?" Randy asks.

"The second you took my hand, like, all of that fear n’ shit disappeared." Dean kind of mumbled, a little ashamed to admit he scared

Randy smiles, shrugging his shoulders a little bit. “Dunno’. But I won’t let go, not for the next eight hours, alright?” 

Dean smiles and tightens his grip on Randy’s hand. It takes him a few minutes to realize the plane was finally airborne but he doesn’t mind. He finally feels safe.

He rests his head on Randy’s shoulder, finally relaxing in his seat. There’s a small grin on his face that he can’t seem to wipe off. He feels like he’s snuggled up against the man he’s likely going to spend the rest of his life with and he’s ecstatic.

dean stands in front of the christmas tree that him and randy just set up in their living room, his hands are pressed against his hips and a huge smile is spread across his face. 

"i swear we picked the perfect tree." dean gloats, as he strolls into the kitchen where randy's balling up cookie dough.

randy smiles to himself, "yeah we did. and it's gonna' look awesome after we decorate it." 

dean walked up behind randy and wrapped his arms around his waist, pressing his cheek to his back. "you making those double chocolaty chip cookies that i love so much?" he asks.

"yup!" randy smiles.

a few minutes pass while randy shoves the cookies in the oven and sets the timer. it's time to start their next project; decorating the christmas tree.

for some reason dean wanted to wrap the tree in lights, which surprised randy because that's a job that takes a lot of patience, something dean doesn't have much of. but he was doing a damn good job of it.

"'s'okay?" dean shouts from the back of the tree, where he is wedged between that and the wall.

randy laughs, "better than perfect." 

"really?" dean asks, trying to carefully pry himself out from behind the tree without knocking down any lights. 

dean stands next to randy and takes in the beautifully lit tree. "i did do a damn good job didn't i?" he prides himself

"always do." randy smiled, giving his boyfriend a peck on the cheek. "okay close your eyes. i have a surprise!" 

dean hesitates for a second and glances up at randy, "a surprise? ran' you know i ain't one for surprises..." 

randy pouts his lip and gives dean the look, "please." 

"fine!" dean crosses his arms and closes his eyes tight.

he hears randy walk across the room and move a few things, then walk back over and set something down next to him. it takes every inch of patience dean has not to peak.

"keep 'em closed, but put your hands out for me." randy says.

dean puts his hands out, afraid of what's going to be put in them.

"i'm going to put the surprise in your hands, it's really special so don't drop it, okay?" randy says, a huge smile spread across his face.

dean nods, trying to hide the smile that is wanting to creep upon his lips.

randy places the surprise in deans hand, a cold light circular object.

"open your eyes!" randy smiles.

dean opens his eyes and looks down into his hands where a big glass christmas ornament now lays. he brings it closer to his face so he can see it clearly. there's a picture of the two of them together when they first met years ago, before dean was in the wwe. a picture dean can remember the settings but he had no idea they took a photo together. they were so much younger, so unaware that a few years from then they'd be in love with each other. dean twirls it around in his hands, reading the cursive writing that read, "merry christmas dean, this is our first christmas together out of a whole bunch more! i love you forever." 

dean's smiling so much that his cheeks hurt, he glances up at randy who also has the biggest smile on his face. "i love it, i love you." dean smiles.

"i love you too. you can finish up the tree with that, put it wherever you want." 

dean nods and observes the tree before placing it right in the middle, where it shines the brightest in front of the christmas lights that wrap around the tree.

the two of them continue decorating their tree with cheap ornaments they bought at the dollar store. but somehow, it still looks pretty damn good.

randy's arm wraps around dean as they stand in front of their tree, taking in the environment. there's something so special about it.

but dean's struggling to hold back tears, happy ones and sad ones. this is the first christmas he's ever celebrated. as a kid, christmas was always just another day and he'd grown to accept that. and now, for him to be celebrating his first real christmas with the love of his life and knowing that they're promised many more together is so overwhelmingly amazing.

dean sniffles, drawing randy's attention who immediately tgrabs ahold of both deans shoulders an stares into his eyes, "hey, baby, what's wrong?" 

dean smiles and glances at the ground, knowing if he even tries to talk his eyes are going to burst with tears. he feels them run down his cheek and seconds later randy's thumbs are wiping them away.

dean pulls himself into randy's chest, a place where he feels safest. he lets his emotion get the best of him as he nuzzles his face into randy's shirt. 

"it's okay, dean, you're okay. i love you, alright? i love you so much." randy consoles, rubbing his hand over deans back and running his other hand through his hair.

dean nods against randy's chest. "you too." he muffles. 

the two of them stay like that for a few minutes, while dean calms down a bit. he's afraid to pull away, he's afraid he's ruined their first christmas together. but as much as he wants to, he can't stay this way forever.

"mm'sorry." dean pulls away, wiping his eyes with his long sleeves that he pulled over his hands, like a little kid whose shirt is too big for him. 

randy shakes his head, "don't be. it's all okay, everything is okay." 

"i just - never celebrated christmas before... so to do it with you is really special you know, jus' got a little emotional. it's a special moment for me." dean whispers, afraid he might fall into another sob fest.

but randy smiles hugely, as his fingers stroke deans cheek. "it is a special moment, and i hope i'm making it every bit as great as you thought it would be."

dean nods, "better than anything i expected." 

"there'll be plenty more to come, too. i can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you, the love of my life." randy smiles.

dean lets out a little laugh, "okay, okay don't get too sappy."

randy lets out a 'pffff' before pulling dean back into his arms and hugging him tightly. 

they stayed like that for a few seconds, wrapped in the others embrace; a position the two are familiar with. they'd spent a lot of their time in silence, just hugging. 

Dean's fuming and his fists are clenched into tight balls at his sides, he can feel his fingernails digging into his palms. He's cursing at himself in an almost inaudible tone and pacing back in forth inside of his dressing room. 

His ears are still ringing and the words of a monster are repeating in them. "Your own father turned his back on you..." 

Dean releases an angry whimper as his fist collides with the concrete wall, he clutches his now bloody knuckle tightly in the other hand. His eyes are squeezed shut and he's praying for a distraction, anything, just something to pull him out of the bad place he fears he might go.

It takes his mind a few extra seconds to process the ring of his cell phone coming from his suitcase. He glares at the bag where the noise is coming from. 

When his eyes scan the name across the screen his head stops pounding and he almost feels like smiling, there's a tingle that runs down his arms and makes him feel excited like a little kid Christmas morning. But it doesn't last long when he puts the phone to his ear, reminding him that the person on the other line isn't here; they're across the country filming a movie.

"Dean." Randy's voice calls, worried.

Dean can feel his heart break a little bit when he hears his boyfriends voice for the first time in a few days. He's been busy, and Dean completely understands. But he's gone when Dean needs him the most.

"Hey, missed your voice." Dean forces out, his voice all raspy and shaky. 

"You alright?" Randy asks knowing the answer he's going to receive isn't the honest one.

Dean glances around at his dressing room that he'd made a total mess out of in the past half hour. He nods his head to himself frantically, "M'fine." He forces out, trying to hide the pain in his voice.

Randy sighs on the other end, he knows Dean is far from alright. He saw what just happened on live TV. He saw Bray Wyatt throw a low blow at his boyfriend, bringing up his father. And unfortunately there's nothing Randy can do but hopefully talk Dean out of his twisted mind.

"Listen, Dean, I saw what happened. You can't bottle it up like you always do, you're gonna' explode one day." 

"I said I'm fine, Randy." Dean interrupts, clenching his teeth.

"No you're not. That look in your eyes, Dean, it was the same look in your eyes when ... - back in June. I know you're not okay." Randy continues, disregarding what Dean had just said.

Dean's quiet for a few minutes. His mind going back to one of his most horrible memories; the night Seth Rollins turned his back on The Shield. The one person he'd grown to trust, somebody he thought was family, somebody he had grown to love, dropping him like nothing. Too bad it wasn't the first time that'd happened.

"Well, s'all said and done. I'll get over it. Always do." Dean growls, and a long silence follows.

"I wish I was there... Fuck. You'd be better. I'd have your mind on all sorts of other things, I'd have you smiling like a damn idiot... I love you so much, Dean, you're my world. I should be there with you right now... I'm sorry - I'm sorry for taking a role in this stupid movie." Randy apologizes, like the whole thing is his fault.

There's a smile that grows across Dean's face, and his mind finally wanders away from the haunting thoughts that were just haunting his mind. He can feel his eyes fill with tears, but they're not the angry kind, they're the grateful kind.

Dean scoffs, "Things would be a lot better if you were here, but hey, you're filming a movie and you're doing something amazing for yourself. I'd rather you be doing that. I'll be alright."

"You sure?" Randy asks.

"M'already feelin' a lot better jus' hearing your voice. Right now I'm really jus' glad you called when you did." Dean forces out before he can begin choking on his words, but a few stray tears roll down his cheek.

"I wish I could be with you. I miss you snugglin' up against my side in the middle of the night, or when I wake up to your hair tickling my nose because you fell asleep listening to my heartbeat. You're my lil' tiger and I really need you." Randy rambles, but it's just what Dean had needed to hear. 

The smile on Dean's face hurts, but it's a good pain, a kind of pain he hasn't felt in a while. There's a silence but it's a comforting one, it's a happy silence.

"You remember how to do the facetime feature on your phone?" Randy asks.

Dean pulls his phone from his ear and glances at his screen with confusion, "Mm'yeah. I think so."

"You go clean up, and facetime me after. At least we can fall asleep together one way or another." Randy smiles to himself at the idea of seeing his boyfriends face.

"Okay. I love you Ran', I love you so goddamn much. I'm so lucky to have you." Dean smiles to himself.

"are you fuckin' serious?!" dean groans for probably the hundredth time as he hugs his arms tightly against his chest. it's three in the morning and some asshole triggered the campus's fire alarms.

he walks to the back of the main field and lifts his gaze to lock eyes with a familiar face who he quickly recognizes as the guy in the room next to his; the one he might have a stupid little crush on. he lets his eyes wander down the others body and realizes the poor guy is only in his damn underwear. 

he must stare for too long because the guy stops a few feet in front of him, throwing his arms out to his sides dramatically, "yes i'm in my god damn underwear! i was asleep! do you mind?!" 

dean's taken back by the sudden outburst. he wasn't staring at him because he's in his underwear, he was staring at him because he has these beautiful abs that almost glisten in the moonlight and his freakin' thighs are like heaven. then there's those dark tattoos that cover his arms and it's kind of like dean's still sleeping and stuck in a dream.

the guy stands a few feet away from dean, wrapping his arms around his chest and shivering like crazy. dean looks down at himself in his sweatpants and thermal hoodie, rolling his eyes when he starts to feel a little bad for the other guy.

if it were any other guy he'd probably just laugh and tell him how stupid he is for not taking the extra three seconds to throw on some pants or a shirt. but this is his crush, the guy he'd silently admired almost every morning when they both get their coffee in the morning. something about him makes dean feel all tingly and shy inside.

"this is ridiculous, dammit." the other guys mumbles, his teeth chattering with every word.

"ah, fuck... here ya' go." dean whines, tearing off his hoodie and handing it to the him. 

the guy takes the hoodie with no hesitation, tugging it over his head. he looks a little silly in dean's sweatshirt and his underwear. but it works. 

"thank you, thank you so much. it's so warm!" he says, pulling the hood over his head and snuggling his face against it. then there's a long silence that follows that gets a bit awkward. "i'm randy." he extends his hand.

"dean." dean replies, starting to get a little shiver down his spine now that he doesn't have his hoodie to keep him warm. he kind of wants to throw the idea of maybe hugging for warmth but he's not that kind of guy and he doesn't wanna' scare randy away already.

"i guess from now on i should have a set of backup clothes by my bed just in case this ever happens again... we're all just lucky i at least got into my boxers." randy jokes, loosening up a little bit. 

dean chuckles, and a thought runs through his head making him kind of curious about what might have happened if randy hadn't made it into his boxers in time. 

"yeah - uh, sorry about yelling at you... i was just frustrated and every single person has looked at me like i got two heads... i can't be the only guy out here in his damn underwear!" he searches through the crowd but it looks like every other person was well prepared for the fire alarms to go off tonight.

"yeah well it is kind of a distraction" dean mumbles.

randy glances at him, "what? you've never seen a dude in his boxers?!" 

"never seen one with a body like that." dean blurts out.

"oh." randy's quiet for a few seconds but there's a smug grin that grows on his face.

there's a little silence that's broken up by the crowd of students herding back into the building. dean's a little thankful because he just made his conversation with randy a bit awkward and this is an easy escape. 

"well, seeya." dean says before strolling towards the building.

"what about your hoodie?!" randy shouts after him.

Seth could feel his temper rising, something he had never been able to control like the average person is able to. And now he isn’t even an average person, he’s this freakin’ werewolf thing. 

The full moon has nearly risen and Seth found himself hunched over attempting to catch his breath in the middle of the woods away from all of society. He’d yet figured out how to fully control the shift and a temper like his is not a wonderful addition.

His back burned and his fingers throbbed as his skin shuddered with the shift. He locked his eyes on the moon as it rose higher and higher, wider and wider.

He dropped to his knees dragging his claws through his long hair, tangling it in his grasp and nearly ripping it from his head. The shift always caught him by surprise and he swears each time it hurts worse than the last.

His ears adjusted to the sound of someone - or something - approaching. He couldn’t calm down and the panic only triggered the shift more.

A hand grasped the back of his neck roughly and he recognized the scent allowing them to stroke his back as his body changed. It helped ease the pain to at least a semi-bearable amount of it.

"Hey hey, easy." The familiar raspy voice spoke quietly. His hands sliding to Seth’s shoulder giving it a squeeze.

Seth’s eyes squeezed shut as he tried to hold back the urge to rip the guys face off. But that’s his alpha and he would certainly lose the battle and quite possibly his life.

"Wh - why me?!" Seth groaned, asking the same question he had been asking for the past two months. The one question that had burned in his mind ever since he received the bite. He didn’t want it, in fact he had no idea about the whole world of supernatural that stalked the same streets as him and to only now be aware of it, it freaks him out a lot.

The alpha laughed, releasing his hold and taking a few steps away from Seth. “I had nobody - never anybody by my side. Then I saw you; this totally vulnerable dorky boy that had so much potential to be something so great. I couldn’t let you waste away any longer and I was getting pretty damn sick of being by myself. With the right drive I knew you would be the perfect little beta, and will be, if you ever fuckin’ learn to control yourself.” His claws traced Seth’s arm that shuddered as his body transformed.

"It hurts so bad this time." He grumbled as he began to lose himself.

"Well of course it does, you idiot. You completely disregard every piece of fuckin’ advice I’ve given ya. What do you expect to happen?" The alpha rolled his eyes.

Seth hissed as his shift completed and his eyes locked on his alphas, wanted to tear him apart so badly. But instead his nails gripped the dirt beneath him.

"Go!" Seth growled. "I can’t control it any longer!"

The alpha squatted in front of him fearlessly, a wild smirk along his face. He had kept his human form aside from his red glowing eyes and claws but that was pretty much his natural look in the wild. 

"Seth, I’m not leaving and I can assure you that if you even lift one of those mangy claws towards my body - well - you know what will happen next. Remember what I taught you, use your anchor." He demanded, trying to speak calmly.

Seth stared into his alphas eyes, a man that goes by the name Dean Ambrose. They had gone to high school together before Dean graduated. He was the outcast of the seniors because of his lunatic habits and angry personality. But he had always intrigued Seth. Before the whole werewolf thing Seth had developed a crush on Dean, and he’s convinced somehow in his weird alpha powers he knows all about Seth’s little crush.

Seth closed his eyes tightly as he allowed Dean to invade his mind. His alpha, his crush, and his anchor.

Seth’s eyes reopened and they were his normal chocolate colored eyes. His fingernails were normal again. His anger had disappeared. He flashed an excited grin at Dean.

"I did it!" Seth grinned, excitedly as he got to his feet and admired his normal human arms.

"That’s ma’ boy!" Dean smiled smugly, taking pride in his work as an alpha. "So who’d ya’ think about to pull you out of that one?" He asked.

Seth panicked, eyes darting through the dark woodsy area. “Uh, my mom.” He lied.