#*dag

❝ and they say summoning demons never solves anything! ❞ ❝ are you serious? right in front of my inquisition? ❞ ❝ at this point, the headache i’m developing is preferable to the templar order. ❞ ❝ carry on. i love to kill people. ❞ ❝ date a girl who summons demons. ❞ ❝ don’t worry. getting in all kinds of trouble and saving the world are what i’m best at. ❞ ❝ don’t worry. kissing girls and killing templars are what i’m best at. ❞ ❝ for 8000 sovereigns a month i will stop getting in all kinds of trouble. ❞ ❝ gather your party and get in all kinds of trouble? ❞ ❝ getting eaten by dragons is human culture. ❞ ❝ guess i’ll summon demons. ❞ ❝ have you ever licked an apostate in winter? ❞ ❝ he say “do you love me?” i tell him “only partly” i only love my necromancy and my dragons, i’m sorry. ❞ ❝ gather your party and suffer various deaths of body and spirit? ❞ ❝ i am dying of something worse than death. magical fisting. ❞ ❝ i destroy the world because it’s the right thing to do. ❞ ❝ i have a purpose. i have pretty girls. ❞ ❝ i want to be a dog. ❞ ❝ if all else fails, raise the dead. ❞ ❝ if she breathes she’s an abomination. ❞ ❝ improvise. adapt. kill ancient gods. ❞ ❝ it was a dark time. there was one light. dragons. ❞ ❝ it’s a good day to bring doom upon all the world. ❞ ❝ it’s nothing personal, i just don’t work with bald people. ❞ ❝ it’s over, ____. i have the egg. ❞ ❝ last night, i saw ____ helping people . . . then he blew up the chantry. i tell you he must be an abomination or something. ❞ ❝ magic exists to raise the dead and never to save people. change my mind. ❞ ❝ make ____ bald again. ❞ ❝ news of the hour: ____ is an ass. ❞ ❝ nobody steals my dwarf. ❞ ❝ nobody steals my good hair. ❞ ❝ oh, hello . . . i’m suffering various deaths of body and spirit. would you like to join me? ❞ ❝ once i learn how to unite the lands against the blight it’s over for you bitches. ❞ ❝ press f to unite the lands against the blight. ❞ ❝ self care is uniting the lands against the blight. ❞ ❝ some people??? destroy the world???? to cope??????? ❞ ❝ sometimes to achieve the world one desires, one must put on a dress and dance the remigold. ❞ ❝ the dogs had sought to usurp heaven. but instead, they destroyed it. ❞ ❝ this is so sad alexa summon demons. ❞ ❝ those bastards made me get rid of my goat. poor ser crush-something-soft-and-watch-it-fountain-blood-a-lot. ❞ ❝ though darkness closes, i am shielded by pretty girls. ❞ ❝ what is needed now is not another templar order, but fine dwarven crafts, direct from ____. ❞ ❝ when i was in the circle, demonic possession was only a game. ❞ ❝ while you were partying, i brought doom upon all the world. ❞ ❝ while you were partying, i made this place a sanctum of healing and salvation. ❞ ❝ woman laughing alone with swords. ❞ ❝ you hear that, ____? i’m a giant spider. ❞ ❝ you just can’t throw a decent party without kissing witches. ❞ ❝ you should kiss someone else. like me. i like being kissed. ❞ ❝ your cat is a gift, but it’s also a curse. ❞

❝ ____ is an ass and everyone likes me better. ❞ ❝ ____ is dead and has been replaced by a clone. change my mind. ❞ ❝ congratulations, you found a friendship. ❞ ❝ date an elf who gets in all kinds of trouble. ❞ ❝ did you really escape the circle so you could blow up the chantry? ❞ ❝ do you need something, or are you just here to destroy the world? ❞ ❝ for 8000 sovereigns a month i will stop killing templars. ❞ ❝ frog time is not for everyone. it’s not for me. ❞ ❝ gather your party and blow up the chantry? ❞ ❝ guess i’ll save the fucking world. ❞ ❝ humans literally only want one thing. dogs. ❞ ❝ i am dying of something worse than death. giant spiders. ❞ ❝ i happened to be in the area. saving people, raising the dead . . . the usual. ❞ ❝ i kill people because it’s the right thing to do. want a sandwich? ❞ ❝ i like big griffons, i cannot lie. ❞ ❝ i removed the chance of love, because there is no love. ❞ ❝ i saw someone kiss a girl, right outside! it was fascinating. ❞ ❝ i would suck lizard eggs to keep you safe. ❞ ❝ if all else fails, put on a dress and dance the remigold. ❞ ❝ if all else fails, summon demons. ❞ ❝ if she breathes she’s a blood mage. ❞ ❝ improvise. adapt. bring doom upon all the world. ❞ ❝ improvise. adapt. save the fucking world. ❞ ❝ it doesn’t matter who’s king as long as there’s a horde of dogs. ❞ ❝ it was a dark time. there was one light. cheese. ❞ ❝ it’s nothing personal, i just don’t work with slobbering people. ❞ ❝ magic exists to summon demons and never to play despacito. ❞ ❝ news of the hour: it doesn’t matter who’s king as long as there’s a jar of bees. ❞ ❝ nobles literally only want one thing. a generous kick in the face. ❞ ❝ nobody steals my mage rights. ❞ ❝ now, let us destroy the world. that is a girlish thing to want to do, yes? ❞ ❝ now we threaten ancient gods? how fun! ❞ ❝ oh, hello… i’m bringing doom upon all the world. would you like to join me? ❞ ❝ once i learn how to make this place a sanctum of healing and salvation, it’s over for you bitches. ❞ ❝ someone’s gonna unite the lands against the blight, and it sure won’t be me! ❞ ❝ sometimes to achieve the world one desires, one must destroy the world. ❞ ❝ that’s what everyone likes . . . a sadistic demon with a big mouth. ❞ ❝ the blight is a metaphor. it’s in all of us. ❞ ❝ the darkest path is filled with pants that eat your eyeballs. ❞ ❝ the jar of bees is a metaphor. it’s in all of us. ❞ ❝ the night is long, and the path is dark. look to the sky. could one thing in this fucking world just stay fixed? ❞ ❝ though darkness closes, i am shielded by fine dwarven crafts, direct from ____. ❞ ❝ we now have a waste bin and ____ is still the dumbest one in the party. ❞ ❝ while you were partying, i fought for mage rights. ❞ ❝ woman laughing alone with blood magic. ❞ ❝ you hear stories about these mortals. how they’re obsessed with rampant slaughter. and destroying the world. ❞ ❝ you just can’t throw a decent party without summoning demons. ❞ ❝ you should kill someone else. like me. i like being killed. ❞ ❝ your pathetic maker is nothing compared to my good hair. ❞ ❝ you’re a champion . . . and i’m just a ____. ❞