@chrisnotcap-evans

@chrisnotcap-evans

@chrisnotcap-evans

He hadn’t slept - really slept - in roughly three days and he knew it showed. He had been a little bit of a good guy when Zan had drifted off twenty minutes ago and signed a bunch of things for the fans at the convention he was missing this weekend and then he had dragged himself into the shower. He hadn’t even realized he smelled like asswipes, powder and milky spit until he’d washed it off. Candice was off with her mother for a few hours, a well deserved break and Sebastian was smacking life into his cheeks when he heard Zan become fussy again. “No, no, no, no, no,” he muttered, hopping on one foot toward the crib while trying to put on fresh socks. “Come on, buddy. Just ... just give me an hour, okay? Chris is coming by and I just need ... just give me an hour. And we like Chris, yeah? Remember? Tall, blonde, gorgeous?” His son really needed to get his shit together, if only so they could double-team Chris and convince him to ... 

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He was sitting, or pretending to. Every thirty seconds, he was on his feet again, pacing, before sitting back down and the whole thing started all over again. There was still time to go, the nurse had said. All kinds of relaxed and reassuring and not. at. all. helping. Because this was it. This was where there was no fucking way back and Candice was in pain (or not, it came and went. Labor man, fucking freaky) and Sebastian had to be calm and helpful and strong while trying to hide how he was literally shaking out of his skin. Chris had said he would come, and Seb believed him but ... “Keep it together, Stan,” He wasn’t in the habit of talking to himself a lot. Today seemed like an excellent day for an exception to the rule. “You got the easy end of the stick, you need to not be a loser right now.”  But he was stuck in his head now and getting out was becoming more and more difficult.

~*~

@chrisnotcap-evans

By the time he knocked on Chris’ door, he felt jittery again. No matter how mildly confident he’d felt after leaving Candice’s place, now he was second guessing himself again. And mainly mentally smacking himself for overthinking things. And so he didn’t even get back into the mental debate over what their night a week could have meant, he just slouched against the doorway, hands in his pants pockets and practiced easy grin on his face. Which ... pretty much slipped off his lips the second Chris opened the door. Instead, he felt like someone punched him to the stomach, heart making a mad dash for his throat and mouth dry. 

He forced himself not to read more into it. Read anything into anything, really. Something had drastically changed - or had it? - and maybe they would talk about it, maybe they would just play a few rounds of Mario Kart and toast to his birthday with a beer. Sebastian was cool. He was so fucking cool, Lance Tucker was hot, he was - he jumped about a foot when he heard a knock on the door. Once, twice he ran his hand through his hair and then ...

“Hey, hello. Uhm, thanks,” Cool. as a. Cucumber. “Awesome that you came over.”

Saturday, Aug. 6th, Sebastian’s home | @chrisnotcap-evans

Today was a groan day. It had started the moment Sebastian had opened his eyes, squinting into the way too bright sunlight and continued that way, mainly in pain (though that groan once he stepped into the shower definitely had been all relieve). But he had things to do today, exciting things that made crawling out of bed a tiny bit more bearable. Today was nursery day, the day where he would actually … do something about the impending change in his life. Coffee in hand (Aspirin and two glasses of water downed already), Seb pattered along, naked feet shuffling over hardwood floors until he reached the room that for the longest time should have become a second bedroom-slash-office, a few boxes still left unpacked gathered dust there now, but other than that it was only an empty room. Seb sipped his coffee, cursing because he sipped it too hot (like always). Apparently his son or daughter would grow up in this room. He waited for the familiar wave of panic, the one he usually had to weather before the more soothing, positive emotions came through but today there was … an echo. An ache or fear somewhere ways back and his lips quirked up into a smile while he stirred his hot beverage - so last night hadn’t been a fluke? He had actually … come to accept it? Even hungover like hell, he remembered his excitement at seeing Candice, drunken dancing and his focus … well, not really on her. Was that a bad thing? Probably not. They were not … anything, were they? Seb wished he knew, but recently hardly anything actually seemed to connect with him other than his impending fatherhood or his work. The one swallowed him whole, the other was good for losing himself in something else and there wasn’t much room left in between. Blake had had to learn that the hard way. Shit, he definitely needed to like … apologize again. Bring her flowers or something. But first – nursery.

[Text: Snuffles] Bring your best space outfit Ab-Attack, I got beer for ya and let’s kick nursery ass. [Text: Snuffles] idk do people kick nursery asses? [Text: Snuffles] PS: sry bout last night. You’re the fucking best.

He’d send Chris the picture he’d found days ago. Had had an embarrassingly in-depth conversation with a bear of a woman at a hardware store, bought paint and utensils and printed off every constellation he could think of. He was ready for this. And that Chris was so fucking willing to help … well that was something else altogether. Seb had been wondering, recently, if something had changed. Not that they were suddenly close – they’d always been that, easily fueled by Chris’ nature and the mild, thrumming undercurrent of Seb’s unrequited crush. Which, honestly, had no bearing in anything, but maybe it explained how they stuck like glue lately, he didn’t know. All he knew was that, when he opened the door for his friend that afternoon, he felt less like run over by a heard of Zebra’s, smiling was easy and damn, the man was fucking warm, it was great.

Seb was on his feet, bouncing on the soles and opening his arms for a hug before Chris had even fully stepped through the door of the cafe. Even if the Civil War press madness hadn’t been that long ago, with everything going on right it had felt longer. A lot longer. Chris was still as gorgeous as always, and his smile meant Seb had to smile back, even if he didn’t feel like it in general. Damn, he’d missed his friend. “Hey man, thank you so much for coming.” 

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