#* q.

the question that's on his mind, on the tip of his tongue, is there. was he born like this or did he become it ? but he's too afraid to speak the words out loud. what if his father had been born evil and violent, part of zuko was him. what if zuko was capable of all the monstrous things his father was doing and it was only a matter of time before he changed too. there's a part of him that worries that he's just a decision away from azula and his father and the thought terrifies him.

he shakes his head at her, a small smile on his face. ❛ you never have to apologize to me. ❜ and he means it. he could listen to katara talk for hours because unlike some people he knew, she always had purpose even when she thought she didn't. his head tilts towards his right side, to get a better look at her. ember eyes scan her face and hope that he can see something besides the hint of embarrassment that her words suggest. ❛ you can always talk to me about anything. ❜

❛ because i can always go to my family home. or a play. if you have governor things you need to attend to, i don't want to ruin that. ❜ she reaches for another chip from the bowl before stopping short. eyes look over at akuma and she can feel her feelings stir uneasily in her stomach. there's words that dance around her mind, at the tip of her tongue, and before she can stop herself from holding them in, she's talking and sharing. ❛ i value your friendship, akuma. thank you for having me here. ❜

❛ you don't need to lie to me. it's not like if you tell me the truth i'll go insane and try to fry you to a crisp. ❜ she smiles then, a dry chuckle escaping her at the thought before she remembers what her doctors had said. ❛ that was a joke, by the way, i've been told my humor lacks the necessary comedic timing. ❜ she looks over at mai and sighs softly. a look of defeat on her face. she was trying, she wanted to try, because even if they had never been true friends mai knew her. mai and ty lee had known azula the longest out of everyone and they could understand where she was coming from. the tyoe of father ozai had been. they had to.

he swallows hard before his finger traces the lines in the palm of his hand. ❛ i don't know what other stuff is there. i think they've pretty much covered it. ❜ he sighs as his hands drop to his lap and his foot sways from side to side. he watches the material of his pants shimmer in the dimly lit hallway before he sneaks a peak at toph. out of all of them, her character in the play seemed to have gotten a stamp of approval despite being portrayed as an abnormally large man. ❛ you seem happy with what they're saying about you though. ❜

he can't say he doesn't share her concerns. he knows who his father is and what he's capable of. he knows with sozin's comet coming that his father will be worse than anything his nightmares have been able to conjure up. it's one of the reasons he's aligned himself with the avatar and her. ❛ it's why we can't. ❜ he says finally. he knows how harsh it comes out and he wants to reassure her but he can't. it's the same reason he attacked aang earlier. but he knows that her concerns are real and it's one of the reasons he's up this late while everyone else is asleep. the thought that his father and azula would win, it's all he's ever known. zuko doesn't know a world where his father and his sister didn't get exactly what they wanted and the thought is too terrifying to burden everyone with. they have to lose eventually. but he also knows the way he's been going about training isn't exactly helpful in quelling any doubts either. ❛ but i'm sorry about today... with aang. ❜