"i love you, i always have."
one. her heart was trembling, hands sweaty and shaking. her face devoured by heat but none compared to scorched gaze his gaze as they meet. the seconds felt like hours as they passed, she doesn’t know why it took three bottles of booze to give her the courage to say it. two. it wasn’t a declaration but a sad fact. she had liked him since she could remember what like was. his name written on thousands of note books accompanied by hearts and stars and sometimes when she was brave enough; her own name. this wasn’t a suddenly honest hour of emotions but a simple truth. three. she seen him go through girls like people go through shoes, there was this one and that one. she never bothered to know their names to her all of them were the same -- her foe. after all the nights they spent talking about nothing, listening to songs about something how could she not have feelings for him? four. she never regretted anything before until this moment -- when his eyes looked as if they were about to fall out. she seen so many of his expressions, memorized in her mind like the her favorite works of art. she knew he like her favorite songs, at times she could guess what he was gonna same if his words were the lyrics. “i’m kidding -- i never said i like you to someone before. so i wanted to try it out. it was a practice i love you.”
she lied.
five. the smile on her face caused an ache in her heart unlike any other. the liquid courage she had felt earlier disappeared as soon as five seconds passed. he was her best friend, her better half, the one thing in this life that wasn’t tarnished. how could allowed such romantically feelings ruin that she tried to convince herself. but rejection hurt and she had too much pride to feel that pain. “did you believe me? i’m a good actress, aren’t i?’ she grinned. she was always the type of girl who could lie with a smile it was what made her so good at her job. but somewhere down the line she didn’t know where the lies stop and she began. @xiesao
