It was by pure chance that Inuyasha happened to see her again. The soul collectors hadn't beckoned him to her side, knowing that he could only meet her when she willed it. He had been scouting the area on his own while his group sought refuge in the village nearby. Her scent hadn't even reached his nose when his eyes fell on her familiar figure, causing him to land roughly to catch his footing. The tree branch shook violently, sending leaves raining down, and he knew there was no hiding it. If he could ever hide his own presence from her.
He wished he could, if it meant he could watch her keep the children company, just as she used to. Somehow, coming across this memory felt like a mistake. More so as he dropped down from his perch, remorse for the past making his movements heavy. "Kikyou," he uttered, "were you here all this time?" His voice sounded hopeful, and he couldn't help himself. Since their last meeting, he could only wish that she had removed herself from the fight against Naraku and kept herself safe.
πΉ "Children, return to your parents. It is getting late and I am certain they are starting to worry. Do be quick.", Kikyou instructed kindly, giving the enthusiastic youth the softest of smiles. With a light head rub to one, she bid them farewell and watched them scamper off with post haste. Her gaze were still fixed upon their retreating backs when she greeted the hanyou prior to his own.
Kikyou's soul collectors were nowhere to be found. After all, she had no desire to scare the young ones. It was not out of the norm for her to dismiss the creatures before she entered a village. The goal was to fit in and slip out when her tasks were done. She did not need a repeat of another child seeing her collect and consume the souls of the deceased. That incident was sheer proof that she did not belong among people. That it had been foolish of her to think she could belong anywhere in this world.
She was nothing but an aberration. A parasite. For one moment she had hope..but reality simply and cruelly set her straight.
After the children were no longer in view, Kikyou closed her eyes and sighed softly.
"You should not be here. You belong with companions..not here with me." How often did she need to say it? It was pointless looking for her and even more so to care for her. All she could give him was anguish and nothing more. It was best for him to forget her existence and continue moving forward. As much as she'd like to do more for him, she could not. It was impossible.
Kikyou could be selfish..but in the end, it would cause more harm than good. Her dearest deserved a long, fruitful and happy filled life. He earned the right to peace and a future filled with promises and dreams.
Her heart ached..as it always did when it came to the hanyou. It yearned for things that could never be again. Such feelings had to be swallowed and pushed down into the deepest recesses of her soul. Inuyasha could never know those feelings still exist or desires. It would make things more complicated for him. After all, there was another who had taken her place and doing the things she would have..if circumstances had been different.
"I know what you wish to hear and I am afraid I must disappoint you. I am simply passing through this village. I have not given up my pursuit of him nor will I." , she replied softly, her eyes having since reopened and gazing at an unfixed point upon the ground.
Theoretically, even if she did as he requested, Naraku would still find her. Their fates were intertwined and it was inevitable. Naraku only existed because of her. Kikyou could not in good conscious stop her hunt, even if she ignored everything she had lost because of him.
No matter how much he asked, Kikyou will not listen. She could not. She was not the type to depend on others to begin with. This was her problem to fix.....And..maybe Inuyasha never knew but there was one thing she had lost which broke her in unfathomable ways. The void it left would never heal and for their sake as well as hers, she will not rest until Naraku was removed from this world. She would drag him to hell with her if she must.
Then and only then..would she have some semblance of peace and can relinquish this body back to the soil, her soul to the after life.
Truthfully, Kikyou was not trying to live. There was no life for her in this world. She had to endure this miserable existence until her tasks were accomplished..or she died trying. Despite what Inuyasha wanted, there was no other path for her. Death was the only outcome for her--whether it be by Naraku's, another's or her own hands.
Angling her body away in preparation to leave, Kikyou averted her face. Some days it were easier to keep a tight rein on her emotions and other days..the grief and the sadness bubbled just beneath the surface--offering glimpses to what weighed in her heart and soul. Today it was the latter and Kikyou did not have the energy to adjust the frigid mask she usually wore.
"Return to your friends, Inuyasha. If you should see me again, pay no attention and go on your way." Kikyou's brows knitted together before relaxing.
'For your own sake, it would be best to forget or ignore my existence. That way you can continue to move forward to the future..to the light. I refuse to let you enter this darkness with me..'
"Live well and be happy." With that wish as her goodbye, Kikyou began to leave.