#| ask.

"i'll PUT you on the fucking television."

What's the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly-dressed man on a bicycle? Attire.

‘’Well, that depends—do you mean literally or figuratively?’ Claude asked, scratching at his jaw in idle thought. ‘Literally, I have a lot of nightmares… when I remember my dreams, anyway. I don’t think I sleep well enough to dream most nights, but when I do, I sometimes wake up in a panic thinking I have the plague again—and it’s like I can feel my scars tingling… its weird. I hate it.’ He heaved out a sigh, chewing at his cheek. ‘Figuratively, I daydream about buying a farm and shirking all my responsibilities forever.’ His voice came lighter then, as he gave a thoughtful wave of his wrist, as if he was imagining rolling, gold pastures and endless blue skies before him. He hummed in cheery content. ‘I’m not sure I could leave my home, though. It’s been mine for so long… maybe I could just turn it into a farm instead. I could start with some chickens. They’re easy enough, right? Oh, I would definitely need a cow.’

‘I—hmm…’ Claude trails off, looking at some far-off place. He could think of a few people – a small handful that always came to mind in dark hours – but one always stood out more than the rest. ‘I suppose… people expect me to say Paris or France, but… I think Rome. So much happened in those old days and… Tolosa was important. Tolosa was important for a long time and—now no one even knows where or who I am. Did you know I was the fourth largest city in the western half Roman Empire? I was bigger than Paris at the time, and now I just feel like—’ he bites his tongue, shutting himself up. ‘I never had a relationship with him as a child…  I don’t know if I should consider him a father or a conqueror or... what. Maybe if I did know him, things would have been different, but I felt… I feel exploited – but I know I’m not the only one who felt that way about him.’

Her only enemy now is aeroplanes.

With his head on her shoulder, Meriset felt Lukas grow heavier by the second, slipping deeper and deeper into his sleep. Oh, the poor dear must have needed that, she thought. Thus, Meriset stayed still, only bringing a gentle hand to the Slovene’s cheek and gently petting in that motherly way, soothing and light. Lukas was only lucky that she wasn’t without entertainment, flipping through the pages of a magazine on her lap under the table.

‘Well, actually, I think it found me.’ Claude said, looking with concern at the young grass octopus that had coiled itself around his forearm, suctioning itself to his skin. Maybe they had chosen a bad day to go to the beach. ‘What do I do? This feels so weird, Lukas—please get it off.’