i want it i got it

are social medias down again exept for tumblr

a cockroach will survive a nuclear bomb

I love seeing videos of pandas being manhandled

he loves you give him a hug you monster

March

y’know what i’m gonna say it. tumblr is the superior social media site. follower counts are hidden/meaningless, there’s no way to make a profit and/or become an influencer. it’s just about looking at silly little images and making silly little comments. 

you’re just jealous cuz my dick is smaller and easier to handle than your dick, which is really large and unwieldy

the utter ecstasy of “is that lavENDER?” is what sells it for me

How long does your ideal hug last

38-45 minutes

that’s really impractical

u said ideal, not realistic

if you’re american and coming to australia, I’m gonna go ahead and say that you should be 100 percent way more worried about being king hit by a dude named “dane” in a bintang singlet than any fucking spiders that exist here

what does this say in english

“Good sir, if you are a resident of the United States of America and coming to visit the sunny land of Australia, allow me to inform you that you should be rather more concerned about being sucker punched by a gentleman named ‘Dane’ who is likely to be seen wearing a wifebeater with a beer company logo on it than by any of the dangerous spiders that exist on this lovely continent”.

ok so what does it say in american

“You’re more likely to get sucker punched/cold-cocked by an asshole than you are to be bitten by a spider”.

thank you

Well rattle my spoons, that don’t make a lick of sense. Wot in tarnation does this hootenanny say?

“If ya mosey on by Australia, you best be fixin’ to get to some fisticuffs more'n checkin fer spiders.”

This is a Rosetta Stone for a single language