Toneyaaar

My own body, brain.. entire existence is uncomfortable to be in, constantly fighting itself, i hurt in every way possible, physically, mentally, emotionally.

How can I ever go home if im trying to escape myself 😞

Erratic sleep and eating patterns have come back in full force, Skin has turned to a pasty mess, I havn’t even had the energy to wash my hair in from what I can count... a month? Self harming options have not only crept back into my mind but also my home, stashed away for when I need to bubble over. My closests are saying things like “It’s hard for me to enjoy my day when you just wake up so negative” and pushing away, or im sinking more into myself, being filled with more dread, self doubt and loathing with every hour. I’m exhausted from just trying to fight my own thoughts, or as my loved ones would say, “Lazy and unmotivated”...