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god the mighty nein would fucking thrive in the feywild. they refuse to give out their real names. behind a fake name is another fake name. they use disguise self constantly. they refuse to take anything at face value and do 21 investigation checks and 15 insight checks beforehand. they have a designated poison tester (beau). if someone tells them anything they double check it with a library and even ask the gods if it's true. jester tricked a hag with a two week old cupcake. artagan never brought the nein to the feywild not just because he doesn't want to go back there, but because he knew every person in the feywild would fucking hate the nein immediately solely for the fact that they couldn't trick them.

Even if a fey managed to trick them and get them to plan something based on false information, these people have never followed a plan in their life. They would spend four hours meticulously plotting an infiltration of the trickster fey’s target of choice, then halfway there get distracted by a horse that was slightly too big and end up on the other side of fairy solving the problem of Grass That Makes You Bigger.

I feel like a lot of people characterize Chetney in a very OK Boomer kind of way and the thing is, setting aside that "OK Boomer" is itself really dumb, Chetney’s energy is 100% angry old ex-hippie. You know the activist lawyer “shut the fuck up” video? Chetney has that energy except far more unhinged. Modern AU Chetney got kicked out of an anti-war protest group within two months of joining not because of ideological issues or lack of dedication to the cause, but because he correctly clocked the government plant who had infiltrated, but no one believed him. And also because he stole two people’s girlfriends, one person’s boyfriend, and a cop’s gun.

I want to imagine that after all of this happened, and suddenly all Sending and Scrying and other divination magic isn't working, - somewhere out there in Exandria, Percival de Rolo just rolled up his sleeves and began to invent the fucking telephone.

it’s very important to me that fjord is stupid hot. 20 charisma at level 4 hot. because he has No Fucking Clue the true extent of it. in fjord’s mind he’s like “yeah. I’ve gotten good at projecting an image. I can get people to like me or better yet, fear me. I’m good at this.” But what he doesn’t realize is that most people in a 60 foot radius want to sexually obliterate him. Fjord in a Trader Joe’s silently sweating over whether or not which bunch of bananas is the perfect level of underripe oblivious to the fact that he’s coming across as Sexy and Contemplative to everyone else while jester is standing by the cart and smugly preening because he’s HER hot anxiety ridden hunk

the thing about this specifically is that Fjord has 18 charisma right at the start of the campaign. The half-orc racial bonus puts points into constitution and strength. Fjord’s charisma is literally the maximum charisma score that a half-orc can have at level two. Travis rolled three sixes. In the base mechanics of D&D 5E itself, Fjord is the absolute hottest that a half-orc can be. he was Built To Be Sexy

Local half-orc confused about why people keep fainting when he smiles. More at 11.