[ ... ] ššš¼šššš¼ššššš. dependent, private muse blog affiliated Ā with briarbend. written and greedily loved by lex.
giselle de vries, the dark rose.
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[ ... ] ššš¼šššš¼ššššš. dependent, private muse blog affiliated Ā with briarbend. written and greedily loved by lex.
giselle de vries, the dark rose.

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the champagne is warm. she doesnāt stop drinking it. she leans against the table like itās the only thing holding her up, glass loose in her hand, thumb dragging slowly along the stem. her gaze moves without urgency, passing over faces, catching on nothing. she feels it, though. the looking. ā if youāre going to stare, ā she sighs, ā at least be honest about it. ā a sip. her eyes lift just enough to meet someoneās, detached, void. ā or pick something else. ā
Ā āŗ Ā Ā ššš®šæšš²šæšššŗššš Ā : Ā Ā openĀ [ Ā 0/5 Ā ] Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā šššš¾š ššš¾ Ā : Ā Ā cocktail Ā hour.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā ššĀ Ā Ė Ā Ā ā¹ Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā beauĀ Ā langfordĀ Ā hadĀ Ā beenĀ Ā raisedĀ Ā toĀ Ā believeĀ Ā thatĀ Ā hatredĀ Ā wasĀ Ā aĀ Ā sin.Ā Ā goodĀ Ā christianĀ Ā menĀ Ā forgave.Ā Ā theyĀ Ā turnedĀ Ā theĀ Ā otherĀ Ā cheek.Ā Ā theyĀ Ā prayedĀ Ā onĀ Ā itĀ Ā andĀ Ā letĀ Ā theĀ Ā lordĀ Ā sortĀ Ā theĀ Ā rest.Ā Ā butĀ Ā lordĀ Ā haveĀ Ā mercyĀ Ā ,Ā Ā beauĀ Ā langfordĀ Ā hatedĀ Ā silasĀ Ā quill.Ā Ā itĀ Ā satĀ Ā bitterĀ Ā onĀ Ā hisĀ Ā tongue,Ā Ā rottedĀ Ā atĀ Ā theĀ Ā backĀ Ā ofĀ Ā hisĀ Ā teethĀ Ā everyĀ Ā timeĀ Ā thatĀ Ā manāsĀ Ā nameĀ Ā cameĀ Ā up.Ā Ā heādĀ Ā spentĀ Ā theĀ Ā betterĀ Ā partĀ Ā ofĀ Ā anĀ Ā hourĀ Ā pacingĀ Ā hisĀ Ā suiteĀ Ā ,Ā Ā whiningĀ Ā intoĀ Ā theĀ Ā phoneĀ Ā toĀ Ā hisĀ Ā motherĀ Ā likeĀ Ā aĀ Ā boyĀ Ā halfĀ Ā hisĀ Ā ageĀ Ā ,Ā Ā cataloguingĀ Ā everyĀ Ā offenseĀ Ā realĀ Ā orĀ Ā imagined.Ā Ā sheādĀ Ā toldĀ Ā himĀ Ā toĀ Ā behave.Ā
Ā andĀ Ā stillĀ Ā āĀ Ā heĀ Ā showedĀ Ā up.Ā Ā becauseĀ Ā thatāsĀ Ā whatĀ Ā menĀ Ā likeĀ Ā beauĀ Ā langfordĀ Ā did.Ā Ā theyĀ Ā smiledĀ Ā prettyĀ Ā ,Ā Ā woreĀ Ā somethingĀ Ā tailoredĀ Ā andĀ Ā expensiveĀ Ā ,Ā Ā andĀ Ā stoodĀ Ā inĀ Ā roomsĀ Ā theyĀ Ā couldnātĀ Ā standĀ Ā justĀ Ā toĀ Ā proveĀ Ā theyĀ Ā belongedĀ Ā thereĀ Ā moreĀ Ā thanĀ Ā anyoneĀ Ā else.Ā Ā tonightĀ Ā wasĀ Ā noĀ Ā different.Ā Ā pressedĀ Ā suitĀ Ā ,Ā Ā champagneĀ Ā inĀ Ā handĀ Ā ,Ā Ā lookingĀ Ā everyĀ Ā bitĀ Ā theĀ Ā broodingĀ Ā heirĀ Ā āĀ Ā evenĀ Ā ifĀ Ā theĀ Ā expressionĀ Ā onĀ Ā hisĀ Ā faceĀ Ā wasĀ Ā lessĀ Ā mysteryĀ Ā andĀ Ā moreĀ Ā poorlyĀ Ā disguisedĀ Ā disdain.
Ā āĀ Ā oldĀ Ā fuckĀ Ā gettināĀ Ā marriedĀ Ā ,Ā Ā āĀ Ā heĀ Ā mutteredĀ Ā intoĀ Ā theĀ Ā rimĀ Ā ofĀ Ā hisĀ Ā champagneĀ Ā fluteĀ Ā beforeĀ Ā takingĀ Ā aĀ Ā slowĀ Ā sip.Ā Ā āĀ Ā viagraĀ Ā prescriptionsĀ Ā probablyĀ Ā spikedĀ Ā cleanĀ Ā throughĀ Ā theĀ Ā roofĀ Ā inĀ Ā briarĀ Ā bendĀ Ā thisĀ Ā week.Ā Ā āĀ Ā heĀ Ā scoffedĀ Ā underĀ Ā hisĀ Ā breathĀ Ā ,Ā Ā shakingĀ Ā hisĀ Ā headĀ Ā asĀ Ā ifĀ Ā theĀ Ā wholeĀ Ā affairĀ Ā personallyĀ Ā offendedĀ Ā him.Ā Ā thenĀ Ā heĀ Ā turnedĀ Ā slightlyĀ Ā ,Ā Ā catchingĀ Ā someoneĀ Ā besideĀ Ā himĀ Ā inĀ Ā hisĀ Ā peripheral.Ā Ā āĀ Ā ohĀ Ā ,Ā Ā cāmonĀ Ā ,Ā Ā āĀ Ā beauĀ Ā drawledĀ Ā ,Ā Ā oneĀ Ā browĀ Ā liftingĀ Ā asĀ Ā aĀ Ā crookedĀ Ā grinĀ Ā pulledĀ Ā atĀ Ā hisĀ Ā mouth.Ā Ā āĀ Ā donātĀ Ā lookĀ Ā atĀ Ā meĀ Ā likeĀ Ā that.Ā Ā weāreĀ Ā allĀ Ā thinkināĀ Ā theĀ Ā sameĀ Ā thing.Ā Ā ā
a slow turn of her head, bare shoulder catching the light, diamonds burning cold at her throat. ā please. ā she said, sodden with boredom. ā heās not marrying because heās virile. heās marrying because heās decaying. ā her gaze swept the room, out of hypocrisy, lingering on the groom with the interest one might give a taxidermy piece. maybe she shouldnāt have slept with him. only then did she glance back at beau, lashes lowering slightly. ā if prescriptions are spiking, ā she muttered under her breath, swirling her champagne, as if it was anything stronger, ā it wonāt be for him. ā a pause. ā itāll be for her. ā she drank without looking away this time.
elise Ā hoogerdijk Ā via Ā tiktok

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let's give it up for emotionally constipated women. let's give it up for women who can't think about being vulnerable without throwing up in their mouth a little. let's give it up for women who don't have the words to say what they feel even if they wanted to