/delayed victory.

            “I’m working on a case about a serial killer.” That was about as much as he could say and would seeing he wasn’t oficially a part of the detective team anymore.

[ @svgarslevth ]

The autumn mornings often tended to be cold - especially so when it rained, which was no rare occurrence when you lived and grew up in Britain. At times like this, Quillsh urged the children to wear sweaters, drink tea and not go outside too much, and usually this kept most of them from falling ill.

However, the elder had a certain gnawing feeling that told him something simple and understandable, yet vague: something was wrong, when a certain boy with bare feet and messy raven black hair did not appear for breakfast - it would have been understandable, perhaps, if the child wouldn’t want to eat lunch or dinner, due to the main focus being on what Quillsh liked to call proper food, and not cakes and pastries L would have liked much better. The supply of honey, jam and other sweet things during breakfast, however, the elder knew that L would have much preferred.

“I’ll be right back,” he muttered to Roger, before leaving the dining hall. Once he had reached the door to L’s room, Quillsh first knocked, only to hear no response. “L?” He sounded more concerned than intended, Quillsh realised as he continued, “L, are you asleep? It’s time for breakfast.”

Still no response, and somehow Quillsh was sure now that something was wrong. “I’m coming in,” he warned, before opening the door, only to see the small boy on the bed, wrapped into blankets and sheets in a deep slumber. Careful to make as small amount of noise as possible, the elder moved to the bed and gently ruffled L’s hair. He was almost about to tell L to wake up, when suddenly he realized  something: the boy’s skin felt hot, almost scalding. “You poor boy,” Quillsh sighed, “That is what happens when you never wear socks.”

  in just a few short days ,  it’d gone from an easily concealed snivel to a cough that kept him & several other children staring at their ceilings in the dead of night.    at second sign of the symptoms ,  he attempted to  heal himself   -------  taking his tea with elderflower & honey like he’d read the day before.    it hadn’t proved too useful in releasing him from sickness entirely ,  but it helped his sore throat.    a small victory in river of regret.

something like a whimper slipped from the boy ------  pained / angry.    he knew watari was right ,  but he hated being told    ( almost as much as he hated socks ) .    he curls deeper into his cocoon as if to incubate.   as if a few moments in the heat would deliver him from misery.

it won’t.   he knows it won’t.   he’s hiding;  he’s   AFRAID that his father figure harbors feelings ill as he’s become ,  &  he isn’t prepared to talk the man back into loving him.  

Their fingers tap, silenced by monochrome cotton. It’s how they function – they strum their fingers regardless of feeling, like clockwork.

Everything is vacant of warmth and feeling. Not really all that different from that previous house, at least here there’s no illusion of frills and decorations. Useless things those turned out to be.

Knos has been quiet; he’s spectating the judge. No commentary, not yet. It’s a kind of torture Nora is all too familiar with.

The dull green eyes remained on the cup once his voice echoed inside this torture chamber. What was he hoping to get? They know who this child is. They know what must be done. A gifted child – more like a blank slate in the making. They’d laugh if they weren’t being monitored.

“ I have been told it’s polite to give your own name before asking for another person’s. ” Barely audible, but it’s not like there’s much of noise in the first place. 

his expression doesn’t falter.   it’s conscious   --------------    what are they thinking ?    he wonders ,  just for a moment.    they’re unreadable.    which is honestly preferable.    so far ,  a perfect fit.    he smiles  &  it’s empty.    vapid  /  professional.

Sometimes I think about how L canonically died before getting to listen to one of the single greatest albums of all time: dem.on day.s by goril.laz.

“I tend to forget such things would come off as impossible for the living. Oh well, I can do nothing about that.”

            “Most co-workers and cop’s I’ve know would have told me I am reading too much in to things and that the case don’t need as much attention, sorry if my surprise seems odd to you.”

the lighting is harsh; fluorescent / a sanitary ,  maddening white.    the chairs are wooden ,  too  -------- placed here solely to be    u n c o m f o r t a b l e.    there’s reason for this  &  yes ,  it seems cruel --- but the setting acts as a catalyst ,  a sort of mild truth serum.   & it is unfortunately all too necessary.

@svgarslevth​ continued from here

     “No one would be able to, they wouldn’t know that you’re gone.” It was a bit sad to think about, but that was the fate of the figure ‘L.’ Everyone knew he was mortal and that either a criminal or age would take him but it was similar to how American superhero series worked. The previous hero is succeeded quietly by his successor, who then in turn takes on the next ‘Robin.’ It gave the illusion of immortality and more importantly a stable sense of safety.

     Even if they did learn of L’s passing, it wasn’t unlikely that they’d choose to just ignore it. Rather than miss and grieve, it was always more comfortable to act as though nothing had changed when possible.

     “I only meant that I don’t think any of the kids will truly miss me when I,” he paused a moment. It was strange to say such a thing in front of this person, but it was the most likely outcome so it would be illogical to dance around it. “if I become L.”

      (Is a half truth a lie? Would the world’s greatest detective be able to sense it?)

                ❝ some will.    some won’t.    that depends on what kind of relationship --- if any ,  you had with them.   ❞              he’s poised ,  as per usual.   patient.   perfect.

that’s what is expected --------- not necessarily what is.    people who knew him ,  who really knew him    ( though few & far between )    understood this.    THE WORLD’S GREATEST DETECTIVE IS JUST ANOTHER MAN.   one who has been given a guise / a mantle --- a mask to wear for the rest of his life  &  ,  even in death; anonymity  ------------------  with the planet full of people he’s served left in blissful ignorance of his passing.

I am very proud of you. Did you know that it has been proven that if you eat vegetables, you can get up to 200% more faster and stronger?

If you do not praise your son for being so strong and fast when he practices self defense on a couch, you are raising him wrong. End of the story.

On the other hand, my son @svgarslevth has gotten so good in martial arts, today he punched a couch and I am very proud of him. He’s so strong and fast.