i have no idea what to do.

or i know what i have to do. but i can’t get myself to do it. i can’t get myself to do anything. i feel so tense. i can’t get myself to do anything that’ll be good for me. anything that could potentially good for me, this voice in my head tells me, “you’re not good enough” or “you’ll never achieve your dreams or goals”.

and i’m trying so fucking hard to get out of my own damn head. 

why am i like this.

someone asks me for a favor..i’ll do it.

or i’ll say i need time to work on myself.

then i waste that time beating myself down and overthinking to the point where i feel too weak to move. to the point where the only place of comfort is laying in bed or on the floor or just freaking laying down anywhere.

i can’t do it.

i can’t breathe.

who tf am i.

why am i like this.

why do i let little things affect me.

why can’t i get over myself and just do the damn thing.

do anything.

i won’t let myself be happy.

i just wanna be happy. 

i’m literally stuck in this damn cycle of wanting to be happy but not succeeding. 

happy is outside of this cycle i’m in. how tf do i break out.

holy shit.

help.