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Today's Document
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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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Stranger Things
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Claire Keane
we're not kids anymore.
d e v o n
Mike Driver
Keni

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@superdelusionalfangirl

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tua headcanon (horror movies night):
luther would definitely be the type to let his siblings hide their faces in his arms whenever they get scared. heâd also be kind enough to sit in the middle and hold the popcorn bowl for everyone because heâs the only one who can get through a movie without yeeting it fifty feet into the air (like klaus)
diego sits on the floor, casually flipping his knives the entire time, the only indication that he ever gets scared being the way he does it faster and faster. and itâs sort of an unspoken rule, but whoeverâs sitting behind him gets to be diegoâs unofficial pillow for the night. he especially likes it when itâs allison because she has a habit of carding her fingers through his hair, and heâs fallen asleep with his head in her lap on more than one occasion
allison is always in charge of snacks and drinks because she makes a mean margarita and sheâs the only one in this household who actually knows how to cook something that isnât spam or bacon or eggs or instant ramen
the ghosts in horror movies donât actually scare klaus; c'mon, the man has seen way worse shit than that. itâs just that some of them look too much like the ones he sees in real life, and so he has a hard time disassociating afterwards. still: that little boy from the grudge never fails to freak him out, and whenever heâs on screen, klaus throws popcorn at the tv until he disappears
five doesnât really care for horror movies but he does appreciate his siblingsâ efforts to bond, and so he sits with them for the hour or two it takes to finish a movie with next to no complaint. sometimes, he falls asleep only twenty minutes in, and has to endure all the teasing about being an old man when he wakes. when he does make it through an entire film, itâs only because heâs busy pointing out continuity errors or how ridiculous the other effects are
ben sits with them, but doesnât really engage; heâs too busy reading for that. itâs also pretty uncomfortable for him to watch movies about dead things and monsters under beds when he finds out that in another timeline, he was dead for 17 years before he managed to move on. besides, he gets more scared from the sound of allison, klaus, and vanya screaming than the actual movie anyway.Â
once, they decide to watch a lovecraftian horror film, and ben thinks itâd be funny to release a few tentacles and sneak up on everyone from behind. the result is one wasted bowl of popcorn, a knife missing his ear by a few inches, vanya shattering at least three vases, and klausâ incessant screeching about âyou couldâve killed me, ben! do you want me to follow you around for the rest of your life? no? yeah, didnât think so!â but hey: itâs the best prank heâs ever played, and itâs just so, so worth it
vanya tries to pretend like she isnât scared, but she actually is. horror movies had never been her thing, even when they were young. but klausâ running commentary is actually pretty funny and allison sometimes tells juicy stories about the actors, especially the ones sheâs worked with in the past, and so vanya stays. besides itâs nice to curl into lutherâs side and feel him jump a bit whenever somebody on screen gets murdered, and itâs even nicer to laugh at him afterwards when he tries to pass it off as being âcoldâ
afterwards, they retreat to their respective rooms. but in the middle of the night, allison hears her door creak open and in creeps klaus, tugging ben by his sleeve with vanya not too far behind. after a while, luther comes as well, half-dragging a protesting diego behind him
theyâre in the middle of making an awesome fort when five teleports in, carrying a box of griddyâs donuts and a carton of milk to wash it all down. for some reason, theyâve always just known when the others are in need of sweets, and tonight is no exception
while they eat, they share stories about their childhood and although it has the potential to turn sad really quick, it also helps them grow closer when they realize just how much they have in common, even after all these years. saving the world thrice from an apocalypse does that to a family, i guess
five is the last to fall asleep so itâs his duty to turn the lights off, but before he does, he takes a minute to take in his sleeping siblingsâ faces: of benâstill slightly distant but slowly accepting that this is where he belongsâcurled against allison, who has always thrown off heat like a furnace; vanya burrowed under three comforters because even as an adult, she still gets cold at the drop of a hat; klausâ head resting on lutherâs chest; diego face-down into a pillow, his hand stretched out towards the space theyâve all reserved for five, searching for his brother even in sleep
and in that moment, five just feels so much love for them swell up in his chest that all other worries fly out of his head because what else could matter when his family is here and safe and together again? so five flicks off the switch, lies down, and lets diego mash his face into his shoulder because even if he wakes up all drooled-on tomorrow, thereâs still no place heâd rather be
presented without comment
Sometimes family is just a civil rights activist, an escaped mental patient, a cult leader, a farm gay, a boxer backed by the mafia, a ghost, and a small child. And thatâs okay.

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The other siblings: all going through a lot of personal drama, having loved ones they want to save and friends and family to protect in the sixties
Five, desperatly trying to save the world:
still not over ben asking vanya to hug him in the shyest, most hesitant manner possible, and the way sheâs like are you fucking kidding me benjamin come here, and just yanks him into the tightest hug he will ever receive in both lifetimes combined because after all the time theyâve spent apart heâs still looking out for her and this is the goodbye they shouldâve always had iâm sorry i am still in p a i n
Reginald Hargreeves: *exists*
The umbrella academy:
literally no difference between ellen pageâs clothes and vanyaâs outfits. ellen page just showed up on set wearing whatever she wanted to and the director was like yes that is perfectly gay enough you may proceed
Remember this meme?
I raise you

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Allison: I really miss Ben, but you get to see him all the time! It must be nice.
*Ben singing âTake Me Home Country Roadsâ for the third hour in a row in Klausâ ear*
Klaus: yeah nice isnât the word that Iâd use necessarily...
can you imagine living in 1963 Dallas and you're just minding your own business, probably on the way to do errands when you find the largest human being you've ever seen in your entire life being yelled at by a child in a fancy school uniform, and said child just blurts out I'M THE DADDY HERE with all the conviction in his tiny body, and later on, just when you think things can't get any weirder, you find out on the news that the man is a suspected terrorist/kidnapper/killer with four other accomplices and the child is apparently their hostage, i mean really what a wILD DAY
I love that Allison says she knows 7 different languages, Vanya unwittingly speaks Russian to the FBI guy and Five speaks other languages in the show. But when Luther and Diego saw Ăga for Ăga written in the floor their first thought was it was a name.
What the f*ck these two were doing during their language classes?
vanya listening to klaus talk about how the world was going to end, their brother and sister were dating, her ex was a serial killer and five fucked a mannequin:
the absolute best parts of Umbrella Academy s2
I literally have nothing new to add to these; they just made me smile. And obviously, spoilers if you havenât see it!
Allison not hesitating for a SECOND to jump into the pool while reuniting with Klaus!!
The whole family getting into the car with Vanya to help Harlan. Just. *chefâs kiss*
âHey, Diego. Canât say hi to nobody?â âhi allison.â âWhat was that?â âHI ALLISON.â
Ben (as Klaus) reuniting with and hugging Diego
Letâs be real, Ben was the real hero of this season. Heâs dead and still prevented a nuclear apocalypse by saving Vanya.
But Diego, Allison, and Klaus also trying? Beautiful.
Diego and Vanya chilling on the steps in the last episode
Five admitting that the entire time he was in the apocalypse alone he was worried about his family
The slow reveal that Klaus has become a legit cult leader
Rayâs biggest takeaway/surprise from Allisonâs whole life story being that there was a black president
Ben telling Vanya to make sure that Klaus knew he wasnât responsible for keeping Ben away from heavenÂ
Diego immediately leaving orientation
And then later lying to Five by telling him he passed the whole thing
Klaus being caught by those two cowboys
Five calling the Swedes the âIKEA Mafiaâ
what a good show. free free to add your own favorite parts; this is in no way a comprehensive list!

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shitty memes are my specialty
family hug!