MELANIE⠀⠀┉⠀⠀*⠀hudson taneti.

‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀DURATION    ›    2011 - 2013, 2016 - present. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀CURRENT STATUS    ›    long term relationship. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀LEVEL OF PUBLICITY    ›    public knowledge.

 ‎ ‎ ┉       *       ﹙ㅤʬ .  OVERVIEW: scoring the hot guy in the year above her was melanie's crowning achievement her junior year of high school. the two met at a house party in 2011 and dove head first into an intense and often publicly problematic relationship. aside from their screaming matches in the school parking lots after his matches, the two genuinely fell head over heels for each other. with hudson leaving college to play rubgy professionally and melanie moving from brisbane to seoul, their breakup gave them the space and time to grow up apart from each other. reuniting, fittingly, at a championship afterparty, they easily picked up where they left off. a frequent presence in melanie's circle, the girls have their own unfavorable opinions about hudson; considering his role in the fallout between melanie and heri. but, none would ever dare mentioning them to melanie.

JUNIPER⠀⠀┉⠀⠀*⠀choi dahae & margaretta young.

‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀DURATION    ›    2016. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀CURRENT STATUS    ›    cordial. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀LEVEL OF PUBLICITY    ›    fandom rumor.

 ‎ ‎ ┉       *       ﹙ㅤʬ .  OVERVIEW: juniper's first everything. dahae was the first person juniper came out to and their relationship quickly spiraled from there. a lot of sunshine and rainbows and puppy love. the relationship taught juniper a lot about what she likes and doesn't like. but the stress of being completely secret eventually got to dahae who was fed up with juniper's reluctance to come out to her friends.

‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀DURATION    ›    2019 - present. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀CURRENT STATUS    ›    long term relationship. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀LEVEL OF PUBLICITY    ›    worst kept secret.

 ‎ ‎ ┉       *       ﹙ㅤʬ .  OVERVIEW: it's been said that pearl annoyed juniper into a relationship and it's not too far off from the truth. juniper's fatal flaw is that she doesn't care much about anything. pearl, deciding she would be the one to fix that, stepped up to wiggle her away into juniper's frigid exterior. they're been going steady for a while now as an open secret between their shared fandoms.

EMMY⠀⠀┉⠀⠀*⠀cara chapman-oliver & quinton ong.

‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀DURATION    ›    2011 - 2012. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀CURRENT STATUS    ›    friends. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀LEVEL OF PUBLICITY    ›    unknown.

 ‎ ‎ ┉       *       ﹙ㅤʬ .  OVERVIEW: cara and emmy were yearmates attending the same finishing school in bristol, england. neither of them took the relationship to be a big deal considering they hadn't ever discussed their sexualities. the relationship was slow though the lines between their friendship and the relationship were often a mess of tangled feelings. nothing much ever happened between the two beyond a long kiss or a short cuddle and by the time emmy had decided to leave england for korea they had already been more friends than girlfriends.

‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀DURATION    ›    2015 - present. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀CURRENT STATUS    ›    long term relationship. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀LEVEL OF PUBLICITY    ›    fully public.

 ‎ ‎ ┉       *       ﹙ㅤʬ .  OVERVIEW: fans often joke that emmy got the y/n treatment when she started dating quinton and it's all very true. around the time that quinton's band, chaos theory, started performing small gigs in korea, emmy made it her mission to go to as many shows as possible. after her attending three consecutive shows, she was noticed by the drummer and invited backstage after the show. despite the half-assed disguise she'd throw on, quinton was quick to realize she was a member of a blossoming letalis. after emmy was famously accused of being a groupie, apricus would confirm their relationship to the public just a year after they met. the couple is unabashed in their interactions and posts with each other, being one of the most beloved couples within the company.

NARYUN⠀⠀┉⠀⠀*⠀park hyunki & trenton won.

‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀DURATION    ›    ? - 2018. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀CURRENT STATUS    ›    no contact. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀LEVEL OF PUBLICITY    ›    highly scandalous.

 ‎ ‎ ┉       *       ﹙ㅤʬ .  OVERVIEW: it's not publicly known how or when naryun and hyunki started dating. the official story apricus gave was that he was the son of her longtime ballet mentor and they began dating in 2014, after naryun's 19th birthday. most fans don't buy the story after naryun accidentally let it slip that she had been dating hyunki for six years in 2017. while it is true that hyunki was the son of naryun's mentor, it's well known that she started dating him in 2011 when she was 16. hyunki, who was seven years her senior, quietly led her on for years. naryun's realization that hyunki had only promised her empty words came in the form of a daintily packaged invitation to the baby shower of his pregnant fiancee in 2018. needless to say, naryun and hyunki do not speak anymore.

‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀DURATION    ›    2021 - present. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀CURRENT STATUS    ›    long term relationship. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀LEVEL OF PUBLICITY    ›    fully public.

 ‎ ‎ ┉       *       ﹙ㅤʬ .  OVERVIEW: naryun and trenton have known each for over a decade. beginning with his work on the group's debut album, trenton is a staple to the letalis sound. famously, trenton developed an unrequited crush on naryun who was deeply entrenched in her relationship with hyunki. after witnessing the mess hyunki left naryun in, trenton jumped at the first opportunity to be naryun's rebound. although it took two years of sneaking around, trenton finally found the courage to present naryun with an ultimatum. giving in, the couple posted a joint announcement asking fans for privacy and understanding as they made their relationship public knowledge in 2023.

JISEO⠀⠀┉⠀⠀*⠀niels holtz-park & samuel myung.

ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀DURATION    ›    2017. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀CURRENT STATUS    ›    friends. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀LEVEL OF PUBLICITY    ›    heavily rumored.

 ‎ ‎ ┉       *       ﹙ㅤʬ .  OVERVIEW: there really wasn't much to jiseo and niels. they had met in passing a couple of times, he got her number from corey, they dated for like two months, and broke up by the time rumors started circulating about them. they've been pretty good friends since then and niels has contributed to some of jiseo's solo work as recently as last year.

ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀DURATION    ›    2019 - present. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀CURRENT STATUS    ›    long term relationship. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀LEVEL OF PUBLICITY    ›    open fandom secret.

 ‎ ‎ ┉       *       ﹙ㅤʬ .  OVERVIEW: jiseo and sungjoon have known each other since chaos theory started playing shows in korea in 2015. frequently accompanying emmy to their gigs, jiseo and sungjoon quickly established a solid friendship. as jiseo became further integrated into sungjoon's friend group consisting of corey and ian, jiseo found herself in the whirlwind of their wild habits and notorious parties. bonding over their introversion, jiseo and sungjoon would become each other's closest confidante. unfortunately, the very parties that brought the two close would end up dividing them after a particularly dangerous night left sungjoon spiraling. though it would nearly take a miracle, the two were reconciled in 2019, deciding to take the relationship they had avoided seriously.

HERI⠀⠀┉⠀⠀*⠀carter kim.

‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀DURATION    ›    2021. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀CURRENT STATUS    ›    complicated. ‎ ꨄ⠀⠀&.⠀⠀LEVEL OF PUBLICITY    ›    deep fandom knowledge.

The ringing ends before she can put the towel down. With a low curse under her breath, she relents to cleaning her other hand. Before she can pick up the phone, it buzzes with a notification.

thought i was special :(

A scoff leaves her lips, her hands clamoring to answer the melodramatic man on the other end of the text. 

it’s 2am carter

She responds, fighting off a smile that pulls at her cheeks and warms her skin. 

The late-night texts from the Canadian were nothing new between the pair. In the month or so since the two had begun whatever this was, Naira had found herself in conversation—or in his sheets—more times than she would readily admit to the other members of their respective groups. A part of her found it a bit embarrassing; how easily he could draw her in with his empty words and blistering kisses. But they were good together. So good she’d forget her name and giggle a bit too loud at his half-assed flirtations. 

It takes a simple, come over, for Naira to pull herself away from her wheel. She smiles a bit too widely and moves a bit too quickly. With a glance towards her reflection in the mirror adorning the left side of her entryway, she grabs her keys with one hand while fluffing her hair with the other. 

He doesn’t try to text her again as she makes the drive from her apartment to his penthouse on the west side of the city. Naira’s not sure she would even notice a text coming from him with the way her imagination runs wild. The embarrassment of the situation is lost on her. She can’t bring herself to worry about the chances of getting caught when she can practically feel the warmth of his body and the drawl in his voice pulling her in gently. 

Her hands shake in anticipation as she twists the key—one he’d taken her to get a copy of last week. His foyer is dark, devoid of both light and life. He had just moved in the day before she had gotten her copy of his key. She remembers the box tossed to the side of his couch; the same box she had tripped over as she lied to Sanghyuk and Romeo about her presence in the kitchen that early morning. 

The fading smell of cigarettes draws her to his room where he stands over his record player. His favorite ashtray sits on the small nightstand next to the wall of vinyl she had organized for him—by genre and artist—the last night she was here.

“What am I doing here?” 

Naira rubs at her face. The cold from the blistering wind battered at her nose, chapping her lips during her walk from the parking garage to his door. 

Her accent blends familiarly into the consonants. The English leaves her lips with the subtlest twang of uncertainty; though she’s fairly sure he senses it from the way he smiles graciously. 

They always spoke in English. Carter never cared enough to pretend to learn Thai for her. She had asked him about it once during one of their early encounters on a company trip to Tokyo back in September. He had looked away from her naked face as he told her that he felt safe around her—vulnerable might have been the word he used back then. 

Naira wasn’t quite sure she bought it then. But she couldn’t think much about it after the words left his mouth. And how could she? Not when his chest was so warm underneath her blossoming cheek. Not when his hands wandered slowly beneath the covers shielding her bare chest. Her mind let go of the thought just as quickly as she perceived it. 

She never asked him again.

Carter barely spares her a glance before motioning her over to his side. Sensing her wariness of the lit cigarette resting in the ashtray, Carter chuckles, taking a slow drag before stubbing out the flame in the tray it once lay in. With a release of her shoulders, Naira carefully crawls into the mess of his sheets, perching herself against the headboard to watch as his tanned hands skim over his collection of records.

“What are you doing here?”

He laughs at her question.

It was one of the things that annoyed her about him. Everything seemed to be a joke to Carter Kim. That distinct, perfect laugh he always managed to release made her feel smaller than she already was by his side. He’d throw his head back. His perfectly browned, floppy hair mirrored his movements; falling back, perfectly, over his face once he was done. She’d get caught up in the shine of his perfect teeth—another thing that annoyed her about him. 

Carter Kim was always perfect.

“I can’t answer that for you, hon.”

Hon. It was embarrassing the way she sucked in a breath at the release of the pet name he had chosen for her. If Carter noticed, he never said a word, continuing on in that perfect Canadian drawl he added to the ends of his sentences. 

“I called, you didn’t pick up. I asked you to come over, and you did. Don’t know why.”

She rolls her eyes playfully at that, leaning up to shove at his shoulder. 

“You know why.” She mutters slowly. 

Her hand caught in Carter’s as he continued to skim his collection. With a tug, she’s pushing herself off his bed and onto her feet. He guides her hands to the player. Having finally picked an album to play, her fingers nudge the play button at his will. French Exit’s opening track soothes out of the player so low Naira strains to recognize it. 

With a turn, Carter finally faces her. A shared glance is all it takes before her hands are on her waist—hers crawling from his shoulders to the nape of his neck—and his lips are on hers. In what feels like forever, Naira lets go of any clever quips loaded to bite back at the Libra. 

“I knew it,”—he’s deliciously breathless between kisses—“you’re obsessed with me.” 

Naira groans into his mouth, pulling away to shake her head. He’s pulling her wrist to his lips before she can think of any words to say. 

That was simply all it took for her to lose herself in him. That was what it always took. A tug of her waist, a caress of her neck, the sweeping off of her feet. 

Naira was aware of the absence of rationality every time she let him draw her in like this. She was aware of the way he tugged at her boundaries, pushing them a bit farther every time he summoned her with a text. She was aware that she knew next to nothing about him—instead, he would distract her from any personal details the same way he lured her to his bed in the first place. She had known all these things, but all of a sudden she was aware.

He bites at her neck—something he never did—and it rouses her out of her Carter-induced haze. With a jump, she pulls away from him, suddenly too aware of all the things she knew before. All the things she chose to ignore. His eyebrows furrow as the record changes to the next song. The silence between the two of them cut away at any notes lifting from the player. Their eyes catch in a deadlock, Carter’s firm hands unmoving from their place underneath her shirt, her own pulling into a fist from their place on his chest. 

“I’m obsessed with you.” She whispers. The edge of her lip twinges in realization, and his eyes remain fixed on hers. Unrelenting and emotionless. 

“Hon,” he sighs, finally breaking eye contact. His arms bring her in closer as he tries to distract her once more, “Is that supposed to be a bad thing?” 

He laughs again. Naira grits her teeth, turning her head away from him. 

“Yes, Carter.” She snaps. If he was taken by surprise at her outburst, he doesn’t let on to it. 

“I’m obsessed with you and that’s a fucking problem.” 

His eyebrows raise as his hands loosen their hold on her body. Naira frees herself from his grip, suddenly feeling uneasy in his presence. Her anxious pacing does nothing to tick Carter off. Instead, his eyes slowly track her movement away from his side to the other side of his room. 

“Why are you doing this?” Carter groans, his hands resting on his hips. Eyes continuing to track Naira’s pacing figure. 

“Because you…” Her words fail her with a groan. She can feel the words on the tip of her tongue but they don’t connect to her brain. And it frustrates her. 

“Because I what, Naira?” His voice rings out once again, this time much harsher. She makes contact with his eyes through the mirror laid out in front of her. She can just make out the furrowing of his eyebrows and the irritation set in his hardened jaw. 

“Because you’re not obsessed with me.” 

The words connect with her brain in Korean. 

The switch visibly knocks Carter off of his chilly pedestal, the shock marked in his face striking Naira. She—admittedly—had never conceived Carter could process any other emotions beyond being smug and just okay. The shock held a bit of fear she could not begin to recognize amongst his features. It was odd how quickly it all happened. How quickly he became an entirely different person altogether. How quickly she could knock him off balance and a version of himself she was sure not many people could get to.

“I don’t understand,” He resorts to English once more. Though Naira understands what he truly means, she refuses to meet him there. With a shake of her head she mutters, “Of course not.”

His arms cross over his chest, guarding himself from Naira’s words. The pensive anxiety in his eyes brings Naira to turn to face him. He refuses to meet her eyes. 

“You know, there’s only a few things the girls can all agree about recently.” She trails off, drawing herself closer to his guarded figure. “And I should’ve listened closer when they said you were a problem.”

Stoic as ever, Carter takes one step closer to Naira, towering over her as he does so. His eyes held a darkness she had never seen in him before, different from the general emptiness they usually held whenever they met up on their late nights.

“How am I the problem, hon?” He hums, his hands reaching out to brush the hair away from her face. Pulling her hair into a makeshift ponytail held in the fist of his hand, he tugs her closer to him; her legs following the yanking of her body. 

With a whine, Naira shuts her eyes.

“Can you tell me? Why am I the problem?” His voice is impossibly deep, oozing with both venom and lust in a way that shakes Naira out of her anger and back into that trance. “What happened, hon? You were so worked up a minute ago. Telling me that I’m the problem.” 

Naira sucks in a deep breath, attempting to hold on to the last amount of autonomy she can muster. It’s all too much. His voice and the way it surrounds her. It swirls in her mind, envelops all of her thoughts, and chases them off leaving nothing but him. She can smell the mint and nicotine on his breath. A smell she had come to associate with the late nights in his sheets, covered only by the thin silk and his warm hands. 

Then his lips are everywhere. Attaching themselves to her clavicle, his body bending down to meet her height. His hair tickling at her skin, his familiar clean shampoo flooding her senses. Trailing up her neck with his hands holding her to him in their impossibly tight grip. Undoubtedly, leaving a slow trail marking where he’d been along her side. Then they press against her jaw, drawing what little will she has left. 

“How could I be the problem, hon?” He hums against her skin. “I’m spoiled by you. You’ve ruined me for anyone else.” Her breath escapes her as he speaks against her lips. Low and controlled, steady in a way she could never begin to pull herself away from.

“All I can do is live and breathe you. Only you.” 

His hands move again. Falling away from her hair as if offering her release. When she doesn’t take the opportunity, they pull her body closer to his. Those wandering hands traveling down her arms and bringing them under his control. They pull hers to their familiar place on his chest. He’s a furnace, burning at her hands but so inviting she falls into line with him.

“I couldn’t let you go if I tried, hon. I’m yours.” His face cradles itself into her neck, his whispers slowly crawling into her ears. 

“I’m yours.” 

Carefully controlled desperation leaks into his tone, furrowing Naira’s eyebrows as she fights against her better interests. Sure that he’s sensed this, her hands ball into fists once more, pressing against his chest as if begging for her release from the hold he’s captivated her into. 

“Relax for me, hon.” He soothes, all too familiar to her ears. “Open those eyes for me, pretty girl.” His words pull at her will, ripping her away from her judgment and leaving her waiting for his next words. 

As if in control of her reflexes, her eyes pry themselves open, receiving the sight of his own gazing intently into hers. It’s all too much for her; his voice, his commands, his heat, his presence. It consumes her control over her own body and it relinquishes its autonomy to him without much of a fight. Her hands relax from their bounding tightness, her voice loses its edge, and tears begin to flow from her eyes. It’s all too much for her.

“There’s my girl,” Carter hums. His forehead presses to hers, a hand lifting her chin to keep her eyes on his.

“I can’t be the problem. Not when I make you feel this good.” 

All sirenic, his voice seeps into her psyche, pulling her out of her own body and leaving her defenseless. Then his lips are on hers and everything melts away. All her anger, all her control, all her confusion. Left in its place is a yearning for his touch, a desperation for his kiss.

Effortlessly, he carries her to his bed. Laying her down as he hovers over her.

She can barely breathe as he pulls at her shirt. Her mind carried away in a sea of loss. All she can think and feel and do is him. It leaves her in a daze that disconnects her mind from her words. And despite it all, she can’t push him away.