How to actually get over a breakup๐
Breakups suck. Thereโs no sugarcoating it. One minute youโre planning a future with someone, and the next, youโre lying in bed questioning everything โ yourself, your worth, even your playlist because damn, every song suddenly hits different. If your like me you probably hear them in every song, see them in every movie and everything reminds you of them and its so horrible , thats why im making a guide๐ Here are the things i wish i knew , i wish i did and out of my own experience :
1. Feel It. Really Feel It.
Donโt try to be strong all the time. If you need to cry, cry. Ugly cry. Scream into your pillow. Write them a letter and burn it. Listen to songs that wreck you. Breakups hurt, and pretending they donโt will just drag it out longer. Youโre allowed to fall apart. This isnโt weakness โ itโs healing.
(and if you pretend , its going to come crashing down slowly , you'll lose yourself faster then you think)
2. Lose Yourself a Bit (Safely).
Some days, youโll feel like doing nothing but watching the same show on repeat or going out just to forget everything. Thatโs okay. Go out. Stay in. Cut your hair. Get drunk with your best friend and rant about how they never deserved you. Order takeout three nights in a row. Youโre allowed to be a little reckless while you process โ just try not to do anything youโll hate yourself for later.
3. Talk About It Until Youโre Sick of It.
Vent. Over and over. To your friends, your journal, your dog โ whoever. Repeating the story helps your brain process it. Donโt worry about sounding dramatic or โannoying.โ The people who love you will understand. And the more you talk about it, the more it loses its power.
4. Cut Contact โ Even If You Donโt Want To.
Block them if you have to. Not to be petty, but to protect your peace. Donโt stalk their socials. Donโt โaccidentallyโ run into them. Itโs like ripping off a Band-Aid โ horrible for a second, but way better than dragging out the pain.
Remember , A wound wont heal if you touch it. What the eyes don't see doesn't hurt the heart. so if you dont wanna delete it , put it in a secret folder , but just make sure you dont see them.
5. Do Dumb Sh*t That Makes You Smile.
Buy yourself something stupid. Make a meme about your ex. Flirt with someone you have no intention of texting back. Try a hobby you suck at. Laugh. Not because youโre over it yet, but because laughing reminds you that you can feel joy again โ even in the middle of this mess.
Keep yourself busy to not think of it.
6. Remember Who the Hell You Are.
They didnโt make you whole. You were already a whole person , with your own feelings , your own emotions , your own thoughts. This sucks, yes. But itโs not the end. You are not broken even if you feel like it. Youโre just going through something hard. Youโre gonna heal. Not overnight. Not all at once. But little by little, day by day.
7. One Last Thing: Thereโs No Right Way.
Your healing wonโt look like anyone elseโs. Donโt let anyone rush you or shame you for how youโre dealing with it. Itโs okay to feel fine one day and wrecked the next. Youโre allowed to miss them and still know itโs over. Youโre allowed to still love them and still choose yourself.
If it keeps you alive, do it.