Anything Scandalous Goes

“Business theory teaches us one important lesson,” says the instructress. Always thoroughly research the desires of the consumer. Apply this principle when you search for a rich man. On a first date there’s one key rule: never talk about yourself. Listen to him. Find him fascinating. Find out his desires. Study his hobbies; then change yourself accordingly.

Never wear jewelry on a first date, the man should think you’re poor. Make him want to buy you jewelry. Arrive in a broken-down car: make him want to buy you a smarter one.

HOW TO GET A GIFT FROM A MAN

“Today we will learn the algorithm for receiving presents,” the instructor tells her students. When you desire a present from a man, place yourself at his left, irrational, emotional side. His right is his rational side: you stand to his right if you’re discussing business projects. But if you desire a present, position yourself by his left. If he is sitting in a chair crouch down, so he feels taller, like you’re a child. Squeeze your vaginal muscles. Yes, your vaginal muscles. This will make your pupils dilate, making you more attractive. When he says something, nod; this nodding will induce him to agree with you. And finally, when you ask for your car, your dress, whatever it is you want, stroke his hand. Gently. Now repeat: Look! Nod! Stroke!

The girls chant back in unison: Look. Nod. Stroke… Look, Nod, Stroke.

HOW TO SPOT A SPONSOR 

“There are three types of men,” she tells her students. The creatives. The analysts. We’re not interested in those. The ones we want are ‘the possessors’, and she repeats the tell-all, prison-intimating phrase, a man behind whom you feel like behind a wall of stone. We all know how to spot them. The strong, silent men. They wear dark suits or nothing fancy at all.There is no in between. They have deep voices. They mean what they say. These men are interested in control. They don’t want a forceful woman. They have enough of that already. They want a girl who’ll be a pretty flower.

CHOOSE YOUR PERSONALITY ACCORDING TO SPONSOR

“I thought at first he wanted a bitch. So I played that role. Now I’m not sure, maybe he doesn’t want a bitch. Maybe he wants a nice girl. You know, sometimes I get confused, I can’t even tell which one I am, the nice girl or the bitch.” This isn’t said dejectedly but as always softly detached, like she thinks about herself in the third person. 

FREESTYLING

Bars/Upscale lounges/Clubs:Oliona walks lightly to the front of the line. She’s on the VIP list. At the beginning of every year she pays the bouncer several thousand dollars to make sure she can always be let in, a necessary tax for her profession.

Some sit by the bar, careful to just order Voss water and thus provoke a Sponsor to invite them for a drink.“Ha, they’re so naïve,” says Oliona. Everyone knows that trick by now.She orders a cocktail and sushi: “I always pretend I don’t need anything from a man.That gets them in.”

Go to an expensive area of town-continues the instructress. “Stand with a map and pretend you are lost. A wealthy man might approach to help.”

HOW TO REACT TO CRITICISM

“You should see the eyes of the girls back home. They’re deadly jealous,” says Oliona. ‘Oh, so your accent’s changed, you speak like a Muscovite now,’ they say. Well, fuck them: that just makes me proud.

You will need a thick skin.People will call you a gold digger,a whore,bitch and those are the kindest terms you will hear. You are going to have to know yourself very well, because you are not going to recognize yourself by what you hear people saying about you. And if you were not born to a certain amount of wealth to begin with, or are uncomfortable with wealth, you will face even more resistance and criticism. 

WHAT NOT TO DO

“Everything you see in this flat is his; I don’t own anything,” says Oliona, peering at her own apartment as if it’s just a stage set, as if it’s someone else who lives there.

Make sure everything you get from your sponsor is in your name-cars,apartment,gifts.Never make this mistake!Cleverly insert how your ex-sponsor who was very possessive and stalkerish demanded you return all your gifts when you broke up with him and you thought that was absolutely ridiculous and very immature.

HOW TO BE DISCREET

“But how can you meet with others guys?” I ask. “Doesn’t your present sponsor keep tabs on you?”

Delete all message and call history,Always meet other sponsors on weekdays,Don’t give out personal info,Keep your mouth shut i.e don’t tell anyone your business,Don’t leave any evidence i.e always pay cash,Call your sponsors by the same name i.e daddy,Learn how to be an expert liar,When caught have a lie ready(the more simple your lie,the better).And lastly NO PICTURES with sponsors.

LAST TIPs

Remember love doesn’t pay the bills,open you up to powerful job opportunities(If you choose to work of course),take you on a last minute weekend trip to the Bahamas ,pay off your student loans,give you a black card for shopping sprees with no budget and it certainly doesn’t buy you a rolls royce as a birthday gift.Always think with your head and not your heart.

**And If she loses her sponsor she’ll just start again, reinvent herself, and press reload**

-Excerpted from Peter Pomerantsev’s new book, Nothing Is True And Everything Is Possible: The Surreal Heart Of The New Russia (PublicAffairs, November 11).