My Stuff

It was probably about 15 years since I've been to a lifestyle event so I thought I would strike out and reconnect with my local community.  I'm fortunate to live in a place where the D/s community is alive and well.

I recently attended a munch and remembered the gatherings were usually 30 or 40 people, many who were looking to find like-minded people to relate to, because they knew their sexuality was different.

What I found when I returned to this community, was a gathering of about 150 people.  A handful of them I remembered from days gone by.  The unfamiliar faces I tried to get a feel for, but couldn't quite tell which side of the D/s fence they fell on.  When I inquired to the old crowd, about who was who they told me that things have changed since the "old days".

Apparently since 50 Shades went viral, many vanilla-types were now coming out to munches, trying BDSM on for size.  I was told that many of them identified as switches, a lot of them were spill overs from the swinging crowd.

I have mixed feelings about this.  BDSM isn't for me or anyone else to define.  How you fit it into your own life is personal and nobody's business but your own.  It's exciting to see so many people discovering D/s and having fun with it.

On the other hand, I've always known I was different, that my sexuality was wired a particular way.  I knew I wasn't vanilla from a very young age.  Much like a homosexual might discover their own sexuality and struggle with it, perhaps push it away, and eventually "coming out", I've identified with these same feelings.

Finding a group of people who also feel their sexual wiring is different was a revelation for me.  Identifying and meeting with these people was instrumental in helping me accept my own struggles with sexuality.

But as I stood in a room of 150 new faces, I knew that I was an extreme minority.  In fact over the 3 hours I was there shaking hands with people, I didn't meet a single other male submissive.