pyrrhic

vv PROCESS JUMPSCARE vv

“Is everythin’ alright? You've been freakishly pale lately, like, more than usual. And you've been actin’ differently, too. Are ya sick or somethin’?”

The question makes Toya flinch. They're in Akito’s bedroom, alone in the Shinonome household. There's homework sprawled on the table, but despite Akito requesting his help with it, he hasn't even gotten his pen out, startling him with the question as soon as they got comfortable.

Of course, if anyone would notice anything different about him, it'd be Akito. Usually, he would have no problems with confiding in his partner. That's precisely why Toya can't say anything; Akito is his precious partner. He's not going to scare him away.

“I guess I'm sick,” He answers, vague and roundabout because it's all he can share.

Akito leans in, face serious. His scent is dizzying, and Toya can hear the overwhelming thrum of blood circulating his vessels, the strong thumping of his heart.

“Then why the hell not say somethin’ earlier!” He drops back down, thankfully. “What do ya need? I wanna help if I can.”

Toya can't answer truthfully, not if he wants to keep Akito by his side. He's not sure if it'll work, but he has to lie, as much as he hates it.

He doesn't want to test Akito's reaction to finding out that vampires are real, and he doesn't want to see his face when he learns that his partner is one.

“Thank you, but there isn't anything you can do. I promise I'm handling this.” He studies Akito's face, hoping he bought Toya's words. Akito's eyes are scrunched in a familiar manner. He's not convinced.

“Hey,” Akito leans back in to ruffle his hair, and his radial artery is right there, go for it while he's distracted, but Toya forces himself to stay still. “I'm your partner, remember? No matter what's up with you, ‘m not gonna push you away.” Akito's hand stays far too close to him, this time landing reassuringly on his shoulder. “You can trust me.”

Toya takes his hand off his shoulder, gently placing it down on the table, despite the voice in his head telling him to pull it closer, sink your fangs in, use his trust.

“I said it already. There's nothing you can do.” He looks at Akito, only to find his mouth set in a thin line, the look in his eyes promising to not give this up.

“Bullshit,” Akito calls. Toya wonders if he planned this; when Akito asked for his help with homework, inviting him over, he ended up agreeing. Now that they're all alone, on the opposite sides of Akito's table, he realizes this is the perfect set up to ask him what's been troubling him. Akito, ever so thoughtful, invited him someplace familiar and comfortable, knowing there'd be no one who could overhear them.

It's also a trap he can't escape.

“Sorry,” Akito says, resigned. Toya realizes then that he hasn't responded, that the silence stretched on too long. “I jus’ wanna know what's been goin’ on. You don't look well, and you're lyin’ to me. I'm worried.”

Toya looks away. He has to decide what he values more. No matter what he does, their partnership could strain and weaken, possibly even end. So does he risk seeing Akito's face twist in fear when he meets his eyes? Does he instead risk Akito's trust in him?

When put like that, he has one option.

That doesn't change how terrifying it is.

“I need you to hear me out, from start to finish. And I need you to believe me,” He starts carefully. Akito visibly relaxes and nods to him.

“‘Course. Go on.”

“It happened maybe a week or two ago, I'm not really sure now. I was heading back home from practice when I was attacked.” He watches Akito's brows knit tight together, but no comment leaves his lips. “I don't remember much of the assault. I got home and went straight to bed. When I woke up, I felt…” He pauses, unsure how to phrase himself, “Weird. Unnatural. My body moved more easily. Everything seemed so loud, every smell seemed overwhelming, and I wasn't sure what was causing it. Those feelings persist even now, though other symptoms joined it. That includes no appetite, as much as I would've liked to try your lunches.” Akito quickly noticed that Toya wasn't eating, and every day he'd bring something different for lunch to offer to him. He felt awful about rejecting his offers, but he couldn't handle eating normal food.

“The sun has been too much for me, too.” This one feels like a confession, something so obvious Akito has to figure him out now. He searches Akito’s frown for realization, but he looks just as serious and worried as before. It seems like he doesn't want to assume.

“Akito.” He braces himself, readying for whatever comes next. “I'm a vampire.” The words come out in a whisper, and he lifts his upper lip with a finger to show off the fangs that reside in his mouth, the final piece of evidence. He doesn't look at Akito, afraid of what he'll see.

“So you've been starvin'.” Toya flinches when the words reach his ears, looking back at Akito. It's not what he expected, and knowing Akito, he can guess where this is going.

“Pretty much, yes. But—” Toya doesn't get to finish the sentence, with Akito cutting him off nearly instantly.

“Drink my blood.” It’s the offer Toya tried to decline, and he shakes his head.

“I can’t.”

“‘m not lettin' you starve.” Akito rolls up his sleeve, then hesitates, then tugs down the collar of his hoodie. “If you need blood, take it.”

“I don't want to hurt you. I've never…” He trails off, unsure. “I don’t think I can control myself.”

“You've been controllin' yourself all this time, haven't ya? ‘Sides, you said you don't wanna hurt me. I know you won't take too much.” Akito looks so earnest, so eager, and Toya wants to believe him, wants to trust himself as much as Akito trusts him.

“I'd have to pierce through an artery. What if you bleed out? Or we have to go to the hospital?” He can't help but worry, every dark scenario flitting through his mind. He doesn’t want Akito’s literal and methaphorical blood on his hands.

“Then let's do a test.” Akito gets up from his seat and heads over to to one of his cupboards. “In some movies ‘n shit, vampire spit can heal wounds, right?” Toya follows Akito's movements as he grabs a pair of scissors. “I'll make a shallow cut on my arm. We're gonna see if your spit will make it close back up. And,” Akito sits back down, opposite to him. “We're gonna test your self control. If ya can hold back while we do this, there shouldn’t be an issue when you bite me.”

It's a smart idea. He has no grounds to protest, despite the worry still churning in his stomach.

“Alright,” He agrees weakly. Akito gives him a reassuring smile.

“‘Kay. I'm gonna cut in, then.” Akito presses the scissors into his forearm and slides them across. A thin, crimson line pearls on his skin; it smells so sweet, so tantalizing. Akito offers his forearm, and Toya carefully takes it into his hands. After a moment's hesitation, he leans down to lick across the wound.

Akito's blood is even sweeter than it smells; Toya's surpised to find that he doesn’t mind. It's the opposite, really; it makes him want more. But this is supposed to be a test, so he pulls away, gaze peeled to the wound. His eyes widen as he watches the cut; faster than natural, it seals back up, leaving behind a barely visible scar.

“It works.” Akito's voice carries the grin he surely has on his face.

“It does.” He's less worried, now. And he can't deny the hunger inside him any longer, not when the taste of Akito's blood still lingers on his tongue; an appetizer, and a promise of more.

“How are we doin' this?” Akito takes his hand away to stand up and sit on the bed. Toya follows, still a little unsure.

“Your carotids are the biggest surface arteries, so if we want to get it done fast it's those. Any other surface artery works, but it might take a little longer. Radial, ulnar, femoral, depends how comfortable it'd be for you.” Toya lists off, taking the spot next to Akito.

“Let's get it over with. We can test stuff out when you're not starvin'.” Akito takes off his hoodie, tossing it onto his chair.

“Akito, I think this will be easier if I'm in front of you. Your carotid runs here.” Toya slowly traces down from where Akito's jaw meets his neck, to where his collarbone meets his sternum. As he moves, he not only feels the steady rhythm of Akito's pulse; he also feels Akito swallow heavily under his fingers.

“Sure,” Akito sounds a little choked up as he scoots back on the bed, face red, and it only gets redder when Toya shifts in front of him, knees on either side of his thighs. From here, he can smell every note in Akito's cologne: citrus and cedar, mixed with a scent unique to Akito. His tank top still smells a little like laundry detergent.

Toya leans in, lips hovering above Akito’s carotid. “Are you ready?”

“Yeah, go on,” Akito encourages.

With a steadying breath he doesn’t need, Toya sinks his fangs in.

Akito's blood gushes out around his fangs, deliciously sweet, and he quickly pulls out to press his lips against the wound. He can't allow to waste a single precious drop, not when Akito has so kindly offered himself, put his life in Toya's hands. Toya tries to savour it, to treasure Akito’s blood properly, but he can't help the way he greedily swallows down Akito's lifeforce. He feels Akito's hand land on his head, and he's about to pull away and apologize, when the exact motions register— Akito's fingers are gently brushing through his hair. He's not being pulled away.

Encouraged by that, he presses more into the skin, sucking lightly to make the blood flow faster. Now that the initial, all-consuming hunger has subsided, he lets himself savour the flavour. Akito's blood has a rich, sweet taste that's difficult to compare to anything he's tried before; it's a flavour Toya finds more and more addicting by the second.

He's not sure how much time has passed, but he feels Akito's hand tighten in his hair, so he presses his tongue flat against the bite instead. Akito's fingers slip down to the nape of his neck, and Toya pulls away to look at Akito's face.

“Akito. How do you feel?” Akito is unusually pale, but at least the bite has sealed up already, so he won't lose any more blood.

“‘m fine,” Akito mumbles out, looking very much not fine.

“You’re not fine. Wait here, I'll bring you some food and water.” After making sure Akito's leaning against the wall, Toya gets off the bed and rushes out of his room.

He's been here enough times to know his way around, so he heads straight for the cupboard where he knows Akito keeps his protein bars. He grabs a few of those, then checks the fridge for any leftovers he can reheat; he shouldn't be doing any cooking, but Akito needs something more filling. Thankfully, there's some curry left over, so he takes it out. He quickly plates a portion and puts it in the microwave. Next, he grabs a bottle of water, then takes the protein bars and rushes upstairs.

Akito visibly perks up when Toya enters the room; he's still pale, but he flashes Toya a satisfied grin.

“You look good,” Akito blurts out, then manages to blush lightly despite the blood loss. “Fuck. I mean healthy,” He hesitates, “Though you are objectively good looking.” Another pause. “Ugh, ignore everythin’ I jus’ said.” Akito buries his face in his hands.

Toya chuckles, walking over to sit down next to Akito. Akito's only reaction is to try hide his face even more.

“Thank you. I brought you some protein bars for now, and I put leftover curry in the microwave.” He drops everything he's holding onto the bed. “And I really appreciate what you did for me, Akito. Thank you.”

“‘s no problem, dude.” A hand leaves Akito's face to grab onto one of the protein bars. “‘m jus’ glad you feel better now.” He peels his other hand off his barely-red face to open the bar and shove half of it into his mouth. Amused, Toya watches him chew. It's when his eyes lock onto the movement of Akito's throat, as he swallows the far too large bite he just took, does the full meaning of Akito's words finally hit.

Akito just called him good looking.

He would dismiss it as a reaction to seeing his partner look healthier, but the way Akito blushed and tried to correct himself makes Toya think that his words were far more than just a comment on his well-being.

He looks up at Akito's face. He's busy practically inhaling a second bar, but that doesn't bother Toya as he studies Akito's freckled face. His cheeks are soft and round, while his jaw is more angular, and a happy, relaxed expression is set on his face. Something warm wraps around his cold heart at the thought that Akito can still relax around him, and that the reason he seems so pleased is because Toya is well.

A faint beep interrupts his thoughts. He peels his eyes away from Akito and reluctantly gets off the bed.

As he walks to the kitchen, his mind wanders. Though the moment has passed, he wants to dig deeper into how exactly Akito feels about him.