whatsnewinculturalpsychstew

One concept I hadn’t thought about before is relational mobility, which refers to how easy it is to form new relationships or leave existing ones depending on the culture you’re in. The more I sat with it, the more I realized how much this quietly shapes the way I move through relationships. Living in a place like Canada, where relational mobility is relatively high, I’ve always felt like relationships are somewhat flexible. If a friendship isn’t working, it’s relatively easy to drift apart or meet new people, and its bound to happen, with our lives and social circles constantly shifting. But in cultures with low relational mobility, relationships are more fixed, and people have stronger obligations to maintain them. You can’t just move on as easily. That made me reflect on how casually I sometimes treat relationships… not in a careless way, but in a way that assumes there will always be new opportunities to connect with others.

One concept I want to talk about is self-enhancement, which is the tendency to see ourselves positively. Apparently, this is much more common in Western cultures, which honestly didn’t surprise me, but it did make me reflect on my own thinking. I’ve always been told things like “be confident,” “believe in yourself,” or “focus on your strengths.” These messages feel normal, but they’re culturally specific. In more collectivistic cultures, there’s more emphasis on self-improvement and being aware of your weaknesses instead of constantly boosting your self-esteem. Thinking about how I respond to negative feedback, I could immediately see this in myself. My first instinct is usually to soften it like telling myself it’s not a big deal, or shifting my focus to something I’m good at. I’ve always seen that as just staying confident, but now I can recognize it as a form of self-enhancement. And what’s interesting is that I never consciously learned to do that, it just feels automatic, which probably means it’s been reinforced over time by my environment.

One concept I found really relatable was the propinquity effect, which basically means we’re more likely to become friends with people we see often. The more I thought about it, the more I realized how true that is in my own life. Almost all of my close friendships started out of convenience like living in residence, being in the same classes, working the same job, or just being around each other all the time. It made me pause and question how much of my friendships are actually based on choice, and how much are just the result of proximity? I like to think I choose my friends because we click, but now I’m not so sure it’s that simple. If I had been placed in a different dorm, a different class, or a different job, I might have ended up with a completely different group of people, and maybe feel just as close to them.

The similarity-attraction effect also stood out to me. The idea that we’re drawn to people who are similar to us. I definitely see this in my own life. Most of my friends have similar routines, values, and even future goals. It feels natural, like we just understand each other more easily. But what I found really interesting is that this isn’t universal, it’s actually stronger in Western cultures. This got me thinking about how much our culture shapes what we look for in relationships. In more individualistic cultures like ours, we’re encouraged to find people who match us and reflect who we are. But in other cultures, relationships might be built more around shared roles, obligations, or long-term connections rather than similarity. 

Something that really stuck with me from this chapter is how differently people can answer such a simple question as "Who am I?” It seems like such an obvious answer, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that even this is shaped by culture.

In class, we talked about independent vs. interdependent views of the self, and I started to notice how automatically I lean toward an independent way of thinking. I usually describe myself using personality traits, like saying I’m hardworking, outgoing, or ambitious. I almost never think to describe myself in terms of my relationships, like being a daughter, a friend, or part of a community. That feels secondary, even though it probably shouldn’t be. Realizing that made me step back a bit, because it shows how much I’ve been shaped by growing up in a Western, individualistic environment where being “your own person” is emphasized so strongly. What I find most interesting is that these aren’t strict categories. I don’t feel like I’m one or the other, more like I move between them without realizing it. And that’s what makes this concept feel so real. It’s not just theory, it actually shows up in how I live my day-to-day life. 

One idea from Module 2 that really made me stop and reflect was the concept of cultural scripts. Basically the invisible guidelines that shape how we’re expected to live our lives. What stood out to me wasn’t just that these scripts exist, but how normal they feel when you’re growing up inside them. Most of the time, they don’t feel like rules at all, more like common sense.

For me, this shows up a lot in how I think about productivity and success. There’s always been this quiet pressure to be working toward something: doing well in school, thinking about future careers, excelling in sports, and just overall staying busy. Even now, when I take time to rest or slow down, I sometimes catch myself feeling guilty, like I should be doing something more useful. No one ever explicitly told me that rest is unproductive or that being busy equals worth, but those ideas were reinforced everywhere: in school, on social media, and especially the family dynamic you grow up in. What’s interesting is that I’ve always thought of this mindset as my personality, that I’m just motivated or driven, but this lesson made me realize how much of that comes from cultural expectations rather than something innate. The script says that a “successful” life follows a certain order and pace, and it’s easy to internalize that without questioning who that script actually works for. It’s also made me think about how uncomfortable it can feel to step outside those expectations, even when there’s nothing objectively wrong with doing things differently.

Let’s talk about socialization, because this is one of those concepts that feels obvious once you stop and think about it, but I honestly had never really reflected on it before. Culture isn’t something we’re taught in one clear lesson. It’s something we slowly absorb through our parents, schools, and everyday interactions that shape our daily lives. A lot of it happens without us even realizing it. When I think about my own upbringing, I realize how many “rules” I picked up that were never actually said out loud. One big example is how to treat people (aka manners), especially those in service or authority roles. Showing respect to a server, chatting with a janitor when you have a second, or just giving people the time of day and basic respect they deserve; treating people how you’d want to be treated. Those are things I value a lot now, and honestly, they’re qualities I look for in friends or partners. On the surface, they might seem small or basic, but they’re deeply rooted in the values that were modelled for me growing up.