booty Hole

“touch of the ‘tism” = punishable offense

if you vote me for president i vow to make everything the ocean again. no more land only ocean. this will solve all of our problems and replace them with new, far more interesting problems

imagining a universe where porn is a marketable genre so you have to deal with raycon ads while trying to jerk your shit

You’re an easy slut, aren’t you kitten? Almost as easy as dinner with Hellofresh

The last of the classically trained tumblrinas

does it mean a girl likes you if she builds a labyrinth around your house

Yes but in the way an entomologist likes a colorful beatle.

[nods] she wants to fuck it. bad.

do yall ever wonder what you’re best known for in the fandom ?

Unfortunately I no longer have to wonder

step 1: mitosis

that pistachio completely sealed in its shell is scared and alone, like a miner trapped by rubble. you need to free it by any means necessary. get the gun from your dad's cabinet

Biggest red flag in a man is when he says his favorite food is steak. First of all it should be cock but even then can you not say something more nuanced you blubbering ape. Not even cheesecake or something. I’d even take a subway sandwich because it means you have some sort of desire to change the world around you

(to the tone of creep by radiohead) but i'm asleep. on mypillow

Bulge pics. Reblog if you agree

just saw a deactivated mutual's post on my dash. that's my dead wife's corpse you're all dragging around

I also reblog this guys dead wife.