iridescent

"LA Who Am I To Love You"

I left my city for San Francisco

Took a free ride off a billionaire's jet

L.A, I'm from nowhere, who am I to love you?

L.A, I've got nothing, who am I to love you when I'm feeling this way and I've got nothing to offer?

L.A, not quite the city that never sleeps

Not quite the city that wakes, but the city that dreams, for sure

If by dreams you mean in nightmares

L.A, I'm a dreamer, but I'm from nowhere, who am I to dream?

L.A, I'm upset, I have complaints, listen to me

They say I came from money and I didn't, and I didn't even have love, and it's unfair

L.A, I sold my life rights for a big check and I'm upset

And now I can't sleep at night and I don't know why

Plus, I love Zac, so why did I do that when I know it won't last?

L.A, I picked San Francisco because the man who doesn't love me lives there

L.A, I'm pathetic, but so are you, can I come home now?

Daughter to no one, table for one

Party of thousands of people I don't know at Delilah where my ex-husband works

I'm sick of this, but can I come home now?

Mother to no one, private jet for one

Back home to the Tudor house that borned a thousand murder plots

Hancock Park, it's treated me very badly and resentful

The witch on the corner, the neighbor nobody wanted

The reason for Garcetti's extra security

L.A, I know I'm bad, but I have nowhere else to go, can I come home now?

I never had a mother, will you let me make the sun my own for now, and the ocean my son?

I'm quite good at tending to things despite my upbringing, can I raise your mountains?

I promise to keep them greener, make them my daughters, teach them about fire, warn them about water

I'm lonely, L.A, can I come home now?

I left my city for San Francisco

And I'm writing from the Golden Gate Bridge

But it's not going as I planned

I took a free ride off a billionaire and brought my typewriter and promised myself that I would stay but

It's just not going the way that I thought

It's not that I feel different, and I don't mind that it's not hot

It's just that I belong to no one, which means there's only one place for me

The city not quite awake, the city not quite asleep

The city that's still deciding how good it can be

And also

I can't sleep without you

No one's ever really held me like you

Not quite tightly, but certainly I feel your body next to me

Smoking next to me

Vaping lightly next to me

And I love that you love the neon lights like me

Orange in the distance

We both love that

And I love that we have that in common

Also, neither one of us can go back to New York

For you are unmoving

As for me, it won't be my city again until I'm dead

Fuck the New York Post

L.A, who am I to need you when I've needed so much, asked for so much?

But what I've been given, I'm not sure yet

I may never know that either until I'm dead

For now though, what I do know

Is although I don't deserve you

Not you at your best and your splendor

With towering eucalyptus trees that sway in my dominion

Not you at your worst

Totally on fire, unlivable, unbreathable, I need you

You see, I have no mother

And you do

A continental shelf

A larger piece of land from where you came

And I?

I'm an orphan

A little seashell that rests upon your native shores

One of many, for sure

But because of that, I surely must love you closely to the most of anyone

For that reason, let me love you

Don't mind my desperation

Let me hold you, not just for vacation

But for real and for forever

Make it real life

Let me be a real wife to you

Girlfriend, lover, mother, friend

I adore you

Don't be put off by my quick-wordedness

I'm generally quite quiet

Quite a meditator, actually

I'll do very well down by Paramhansa Yogananda's realization center, I'm sure

I promise you'll barely even notice me

Unless you want to notice me

Unless you prefer a rambunctious child

In which case, I can turn it on, too

I'm quite good on the stage as you may know

You might have heard of me

So either way, I'll fit in just fine

So just love me by doing nothing

And perhaps, by not shaking the county line

I'm yours if you'll have me

Morning coffee.