i've got ǝɹɐɯʇɥƃᴉu sǝʎǝ

‘  do you think we’re gonna die here tonight?  ’ ‘  it’s horrifying, chilling… just over all not good.  ’ ‘  should we just get this over with?  ’ ‘  he’s a fucking criminal.  ’ ‘  sharing is caring? meh, go fuck yourself.  ’ ‘  oh god, um… oh my god, i fucking hate this.  ’ ‘  stop banging on the door, you dick.  ’ ‘  what. the fuck. is wrong with you.  ’ ‘  i gotta be honest, this doesn’t really compel me very much.  ’ ‘  that was a joke that i made and then it formed your opinion on it.  ’ ‘  flip that switch. do you think that’s the murder switch?  ’ ‘  this is embarrassing. this is embarrassing for you, i think.  ’ ‘  no one’s ghost-proof.  ’ ‘  i’m ghost-proof.  ’ ‘  you’re not ghost-proof. you’re just an idiot who refuses to see proof.  ’ ‘  i’m ghost-proof, baby!  ’ ‘  that sounded like will smith!  ’ ‘  is will smith dead? has anyone checked the news?!  ’ ‘  the problem is if there’s something that attacks us down here, i’m going to hit my head on the ceiling and my skull will smash.  ’ ‘  alright, buddy. keep your wits about ya.  ’ ‘  let’s get the fuck out of here.  ’ ‘  i kind of just looked into places that would make me wanna die and i think this checks that box.  ’ ‘  did i just blind you? good, good, good. it’ll give you the vision.  ’ ‘  take a drink!  ’ ‘  i’m gonna get you all tanked.  ’ ‘  what do you expect? what insight are you trying to gather from here?  ’ ‘  maybe the noise is a little snake. can you imagine a little snake wrapped around a little pickaxe with a little hat on?  ’ ‘  i’m not trying to do that whole dismissive thing, but… i’m dismissing it.  ’ ‘  alright. alright, man. you just gotta chill.  ’ ‘  i thought ‘glory hole’ used to mean something very innocuous, though.  ’ ‘  it’s where the men fucked the earth hoping to impregnate it with gold.  ’ ‘  a bug flew up my nose.  ’ ‘  i think i’ve swallowed about six tablespoons of bugs at this point.  ’ ‘  it’s so silent aside from the bugs in my ears.  ’ ‘  a bat flew right behind you just now.  ’ ‘  that bat was straight-up going for your ass… it was an ass bat.  ’ ‘  dude, i’m so nervous.  ’ ‘  how can you be nervous with a beautiful sunset like that?  ’ ‘  there’s some pretty shitty things that have happened to people around here.  ’ ‘  can you even look at least a little bit worried?  ’ ‘  yeah, i’m fucking nervous, man. i feel like i’m gonna vomit.  ’ ‘  we’re all assholes here.  ’ ‘  i don’t know why i phrased it ‘lucky for us.’ i think i was feeling brave when i wrote this.  ’ ‘  yeah, this isn’t lucky for you at all.  ’ ‘  i’m gonna try and avoid saying ‘demon’ as much as i can.  ’ ‘  i’m not gonna let you goad me into this, i know what you’re trying to do.  ’ ‘  shut up. we’re moving on.  ’ ‘  you know what? i’m not trying to scare you, but… i got a bad feeling about this one.  ’ ‘  why are you unbuttoning your pants? we’re in public right now.  ’ ‘  oh… you’ve out-dumbed yourself.  ’ ‘  you know, i thought this was gonna be funny, but now i’m actually happy that i have it.  ’ ‘  i’m a whole other coin. just like a chill ass wheat-back penny.  ’ ‘  i’m doing it for the betterment of the science.  ’ ‘  any demons here? you got any demons out tonight? any horn-y boys or whatever they are.  ’ ‘  you may not like this… i’m gonna try to agitate it.  ’ ‘  you do what you gotta do and i’ll do what i gotta do.  ’ ‘  i’m just gonna be as crude as possible here.  ’ ‘  no, no, no. just right out of the gate. why build up?  ’ ‘  if you don’t believe then there’s nothing for you to be afraid of, right?  ’ ‘  you can be is big of a prick as you want, but i’m staying over here.  ’ ‘  if you want me off this bridge, you’re gonna have to kill me.  ’ ‘  nope! don’t loop me into your shit!  ’ ‘  stop looping me. i hate when you do this to me in demon places.  ’ ‘  i’m not part of his little charade.  ’ ‘  children will come here and tell tales about me.  ’ ‘  shut the fuck up – i’m gonna murder you.  ’ ‘  oh what a load of horse shit.  ’ ‘  oh, skip the theatrics and just go into it.  ’ ‘  if you want me off this bridge, you’re gonna have to throw me off.  ’ ‘  you gotta admit, that is an effective technique.  ’ ‘  no, it’s not an effective technique. it’s a way to get killed.  ’ ‘  that’s not how you get them, shut up.  ’ ‘  when’s the last time you ever walked into the dark woods?  ’ ‘  this is so much scarier than hunting fucking sasquatch.  ’ ‘  people usually feel overcome with emotion in here, like a violent emotion.  ’ ‘  give me a heads up if you start to feel murderous. i would appreciate that.  ’ ‘  by the way, these woods are also scary because of the people that might be in there.  ’ ‘  i mean, people are greater threats than demons or ghouls.  ’ ‘  i can’t fight, you can’t fight.  ’ ‘  you’re like one of those carwash floaty things that are out front just wiggling around.  ’ ‘  anyone doing up to no good out here?  ’ ‘  one of these times we’re gonna die.  ’ ‘  oh shit! there’s something over there. i don’t know what it is, but the bushes are moving.   ’ ‘  i just heard a scream.  ’ ‘  well, if we just make it seem like we’re in on it, like… we’re here for the cult stuff.  ’ ‘  we’re here for the cult stuff. we saw the ad on craigslist.  ’ ‘  it feels weird to even joke. i’m so fucking scared right now.  ’ ‘  oh sure they’d be hiding in the bushes. they’re cultists.  ’ ‘  i keep collecting spiderwebs on my face and now i’m just sort of immune to them. i’m just letting them accumulate.  ’ ‘  well, you are just a giant stick walking around.  ’ ‘  oh, this looks fun… an odd collection of branches. looks like a witch lair or something.  ’ ‘  hello? you can’t be doing occult stuff like this. it’s a weeknight.  ’ ‘  dude, wait. you’re fucking crazy.  ’ ‘  you need to chill. you need to chill out.  ’ ‘  hey man, it’s just a plant.  ’ ‘  we kicked goatman off the bridge, it’s ours now.  ’ ‘  goatman, are you out here in the woo– well, he’s out here in the woods ‘cause he’s not tending to his bridge.  ’ ‘  clearly. that’s why finders keepers and all that.  ’ ‘  hey, if there’s cultists out there… i gotta let you know, my pal has a water gun.  ’ ‘  i don’t like this, i don’t like this one bit.  ’ ‘  we are hearing noise from all sides at this point. it’s very blair witch.  ’ ‘  yeah, let’s leave.  ’ ‘  the name ‘steve’ doesn’t really strike fear into the heart.  ’ ‘  i’ll go along with this. fun gimmick.  ’ ‘  well demons, it’s been fun.  ’ ‘  as we snuff these candles so too do we snuff you from this mortal world, you fucking wimp.  ’ ‘  this bridge is officially mine. they’ll tell legends of me here.  ’ ‘  oh god, i feel like i’ve gone to the dark side.  ’ ‘  just gloat a little bit. this is a win for you.  ’

❝ Tell me about it. Totally different from our homes, huh. ❞

@spiritedfeline

well wait a minute. this guy doesn't look like one of those furless mouth-breathers that walk around either. he looks more... lizard-ish. i guess he had a point -- there were a lack of upright animals wandering around the city it seemed. she'd have to get used to the oohing and ahhing if she didn't want to go crazy. well, crazier.

NIGHT IN THE WOODS

at the end of everything, hold onto anything