(above: new easy girl. new . .. Ā life)
My name is RJ, (everyone says āHi, RJā in unison here) and I do everything. For years (my entire life, maybe?) āI do everythingā has been sort of my modus, full stop. I used to have a business card that said āRobert J! Lake: Professional Everythingā and after that I had one that listed āMusic, Design, Writing, Animation, and Illustrationā with āBasically Everythingā underneath it. Itās a part of me. And itās ran me for as long as Iāve been able to think.
Itās more than just a pull towards productivity, towards a workaholism. Itās more selfish than that. Iām addicted to it, which is weird. Iām not really addicted to things, in general (even if people say I have an āaddictive personalityā), but this gives me a thrill like nothing else.
Part of it is that I think I can do everything, and part of that is that historyās generally held that up, because no arrogance here but Iām pretty good at juggling a lot of things at once. Whatās unhealthy, like really unhealthy, though, is the perpetual dissatisfaction with not doing enough. Iāve got one hell of a Superman complex and I always feel like Iām not good enough if Iām not exerting myself to the point where Iām nothing.
I canāt do that anymore, though. Iāve been stretched thin for what feels like an eternity and I need to regroup if I want to get anything done for real, because what ends up happening is a lot of crashing and burning over and over and over and over. So Iām done.
That doesnāt mean Iām going to stop juggling projects in the air, because that will never be something Iāll even be able to let myself do. That also doesnāt mean I wonāt keep adding projects to my list. But Iām going to do it productively, and Iām going to build myself. A lot less secret projects with years going by before anything happens, I think, is probably better for both me and people who like what I do.
Okay sure but why is this something I should care about my good dude?
Ironically itās because that means Iāll be able to do more on here (and in general, with my B r a n d and such). Ā So I have some announcements of some stuff below the cut.
PATREON HAS BEEN AN UTTER FAILURE AND IāM FIXING THAT IMMEDIATELY
Iām really upset with myself because I was gung-ho about making a better effort towards Patreon and then...nothing. And there are a lot of things to blame for that, mostly my own doing, including (and especially) the eternal horror of a workweek, of needing a job, of The Fear. If I donāt hit a certain money threshold (about 2000-2500 dollars a month) I am in a panic that ends up all-consuming because that allows me no room for error. No savings, nothing much really. Every month is a struggle and every month is consumed by that fear. But nothing gets better if I donāt try something different to break that cycle.
So here we are. Patron is going to be my new home. Most work Iāve posted has been on Soundcloud and Twitter and (well not much lately) here because I havenāt felt brave enough to devote time to something that people wonāt see, but of course people donāt want to see it because it isnāt there. So I have to value myself enough to make that leap.
Starting ASAP, Patreon is going to be my first post outlet both publicly and for patrons. Iāll be massively overhauling my patron tiers (1,2,3,4, and maybe probably 5 is the new spread) and my new focus is on direct responses to people who help my patreon; one of the first effects of this will be patron-only polls, helping direct me to figure out what part of the everything I do you most want at any given moment. I am my own person but I wouldnāt be here without you and although Iām confident in my ability to tackle almost anything itās exhausting sometimes because I have no earthly idea where my time is best spent sometimes.
WEEKLY STREAMS ARE GONNA BE A THING AGAIN
I stopped doing the weekly stream thing partially as a result of needing a workweek and that workweek basically killed me but to be honest I miss it, and if the past few days are any indication you guys are really there for me hard if I actually push for it, and I havenāt been doing that because Iāve been basically mired in semi-secret projects that I havenāt allowed myself to show much stuff from because I have a thing about it but it should be obvious from Stuckhome Syndromeās existence that I have a tendency to make a shitload of things and show people 1% of them until they pile up at once. So Iām cutting that shit out and Iām going to try (try) to be more public about my process and my work. Ideally without giving everything away; striking that balance is kind of the thing I have to figure out, right?
Iām going to start that soon. Tuesday? Thursday? Iām free those days this week. Getting a consistent schedule is the biggest challenge with my day job basically running me into the ground.
ON THAT NOTE, HOLY HELL HEREāS WHAT IāM WORKING ON RIGHT NOW
Oblivion Genesis: The big thing right now. An RPG (of a sort) Iām directing, art directing, doing animation for, doing all the music and sfx, designing, and writing based on original concepts by Jack Casteel (whoās also programming it and doing most of the spell design + metagame balance work and i guess...executive producing? co-directing? itās only 3 people on the team everyone is doing a lot and we havenāt hammered out these terms yet). He came up with the base premise for the game and most of the characters, and I took that and am writing and rewriting and creating an entirely new and very elaborate gameplay structure for the overworld and the battles themselves, plus doing a lot of the art etc etc. I canāt wait to show you much, much more. Also this game features character art by the wonderful Rachel Lundin so obviously this is going to be the best video game ever made. You can hear some of the music right here right now.
Group Hug: A webcomic. Iāll talk about this more on my Patreon soon.
ACTIVE PROJECTS IāM ATTACHED TO (In other words, projects Iām doing stuff for that arenāt necessarily mine):
HALT: A video game about shootmanning in the future. Iām doing the music. Hereās the first trailer.
Muddledash!: Octopus racing. Iām doing the music. Hereās a trailer.
BULLETIN: An RPG about finding your dad. Iām doing the music and potentially other stuff too. Hereās some early gameplay tests featuring my music.
PROBABLY GONNA TRY LAUNCHING A PODCAST SOON TOO
Itāll be called Little RJ Things. Weāll see how that goes.
Thatās it I think. Uh, if you can, definitely check out my patreon and bandcamp and/or commission me. It really helps. Iāll be making some announcements soon about all of that too. THANK YOU. MORE VERY SOON