Warning: [ The following story contain subjects of Mental and physical Abuse based from real life events. Some of the scenes and chapters might be triggering and disturbing for some readers. Please make sure to skip this Fic if it's triggering and prioritise your mental health. ]
The party venue felt alive the moment you entered with Nina. Lights flickering in all colors, the sound of songs almost loud enough to wake the whole town from sleep.
People you barely recognized were dancing and drinking, and some were chatting on the side. Laughter filled the air alongside their excitement.
You tried to smile and introduce yourself every time someone would notice you; some were your boyfriend's friends that you recognized from pictures and videos that he shared, while the rest were unknown to you.
It wasn't like he ever introduced you to his friends.
It didn't feel like a birthday party but a night at a club. The anxiety in your heart kept spiking up when you lost Nina in the crowd and couldn't find your boyfriend either. Random strangers approached you, complimenting the red dress that you wore, only because your boyfriend had given it to you last month for the party, he sent you a tight, almost above thighs dress, sparking like the sun. You didn't feel beautiful in it; you felt uncomfortable. Yet, you wore it to make him happy.
After walking through the crowd for a while, you saw him, your boyfriend. Standing near the exit door across the room, a smile on his face. The beautiful smile that you fell in love with the first time you saw him.
He was laughing, talking to a girl. Your smile flattered as you noticed how happy he seemed, making the girl laugh.
You couldn't hide the nausea building up in your stomach, but you thought to push through it all and reach him. You bumped into strangers and friends on your way to finally reach him.
Now, youstood a few feet from him as he was completely oblivious of your presence.
Your heart drumming in your chest as you softly tapped his hand, causing him to turn around as the look on the girl's face turned sour.
"Hi," He glanced at you, or at your dress for a while.
He didn't wish you a happy birthday, he didn't hug you, and he surely didn't smile at you. Nothing other than just kept his eyes on your dress...your body.
You felt nausea sweep up to you at the way he was staring at you.
The girl rolled her eyes, leaving as she noticed your boyfriend, Ian, staring at you and not her for a second.
"The dress is hot." He smirked. You forced a smile; at least he was talking to you, right?
"Thank you for it." You replied. He nodded, "I knew it would look good on you."
He was smiling and talking to you, so that means he still loves-
"Hey, I'll talk to you later." He walked past you, almost pushing your shoulders as he followed the girl who had just left.
You blinked in surprise, confusion, and hurt.
You felt embarrassed? Fighting the tears from falling, you sighed as your fingers caught the hem of the dress to calm yourself down; it didn't work.
For the rest of the night, you walked behind him like a lost puppy. He kept talking to others and would eventually introduce you to whoever he was talking to if they noticed you standing there awkwardly. Otherwise, he would keep the conversation going as if you wasn’t in his shadow.
It was around nine when he got on the stage to introduce his band and started singing while you stood on the side, not once did he look at you. He acted like a rockstar performing at a concert, not His girlfriends birthday party. He loved the attention the three girls near the stage were giving him.
He sang a few more songs and did not even glance at you during them, nor wish you a happy birthday. It was his time to shine.
Yet you loved seeing him smile. His joy mattered so much to you that it didn't matter how he was avoiding you on your own birthday.
"Maybe he's going through a hard time." You thought to yourself. At least he was happy.
However, deep down, you wished he would turn his attention towards you and smile , and even ask you to join him on the stage. You wanted him to notice you in the crowd, and he didn't.
Even after he finished singing, he was gathered with everyone cheering for him, girls hugging him, and you was pushed to the side. After an hour of him speaking to everyone, you finally got the chance to talk to him in silence as you found him outside smoking.
He huffed the smoke, taking another drag, and didn't care to turn towards you when you exited the door to reach him.
"Hey, baby. You were perfect on the stage."
He nodded and looked ahead. "I want you to talk about the text you sent-"
"Can you not?" He said coldly, then turned to face you, "You've been blowing up my phone since then. Why? That was so messed up."
You blinked in surprise at his sudden change of reaction. "Because you stopped talking to me after saying that I didn't care? What did I do-"
"You need to relax, stop acting like that, it's embarrassing." He pushed past you and went inside the party venue.
You felt the tears filling your eyes as you felt utterly confused at whatever had just happened.
Your heart was too broken to get back to that party, even though you wanted to run behind him and beg him to tell you what was wrong, but you needed to cry this out and leave.
It was getting to you; you had barely slept the day before, and all your emotions slapped you hard as you broke down in sobs, leaving the party. The cold wind didn't hurt as much as your heart was.
You walked down the road, not caring that people were staring at you messed up makeup.
What happened that made him change 180 all of a sudden?
Everything was confusing to you. Your first boyfriend was acting as if you suddenly didn't matter.
Entering the apartment, you sighed, throwing your bag on the counter as you walked past the small kitchen. The lights were off, and it felt too quiet; you could feel your ears ringing. Suddenly, it hit you; you were alone on your twenty first birthday.
Out there, everyone was dancing and singing to what was supposed to be your nights, yet none of them noticed when you left, not even a text asking you if you were alright.
Kicking your painful heels, you walked to the comfortable couch and stood there with your hands resting on the head of it, while tears streamed down your face, messing up the rest of your makeup. Your chest heavy with disappointment and embarrassment.
Why would he suddenly change on you like that?
It all felt wrong, and you hated the fact that you did not know when it all went wrong.
Checking your phone one last time sent nothing but disappointment to your heart; Nothing from him.
You hoped that he would text and apologize, and that it was all a misunderstanding, and they would go back to being Normal.
With a sigh, you went to change from the dress to much comfortable clothes, gray sweatpants, and a black t-shirt. As you washed your face, there was a clear reflection of your red eyes in the mirror; you went from being the happiest to being unable to stop crying.
Yet you did not understand why.
Your stomach growled; you hadn’t eaten all day, and lost the appetite right now even when hed body needed the sustenance, she couldn't bring yourself to eat, which is weird since you loved eating and cooking. It felt as if you would throw up at any moment if you touched food.
You curled into the messy bed, hugging your pillow as tears streamed down your cheek and shoulder shook from how hard you was crying into the pillow.
You cried until exhaustion took over you and drifted to restless sleep.
Which also did not last long, your sleep was cut short when your phone would not stop buzzing repeatedly under the pillow at three in the morning.
The feeling of buzzing sent chills down your spine, as you was still fast asleep, and feeling the buzzing made it worse. The sudden act of waking up made your heart race, feeling disoriented than earlier. You reached out to answer the phone.
His name flashed on the screen, lighting the dark. Before you could answer, the call cut short. Grabbing your glasses, you unlocked the phone to find texts over texts from him and missed calls.
Immediately, you called him back as you rubbed the sleep away from your eyes, still feeling your hands shaking because of the sudden jolt from sleep.
The line kept ringing until he finally answered, "Ian? Baby? What's wrong?"
"Hey." He answered, sounding disoriented and drunk. But that did not matter since he was talking to you finally; his soft voice brought a smile to your face as you clutched the phone with both hands. "Why didn't you reply to my text? Are you talking to other guys? Huh?"
Your smile dropped. "N-no, I was asleep. I promise-"
"Why did you go to sleep without telling me?" he almost shouted.
You flinched; they would always text each other before falling asleep. Hell, you would fall asleep on calls most nights.
He chuckled. "Yessss, I just wish you were here with me so I can kiss you. I miss you. Why did you leave without hugging me? Do you not love me anymore?"
Just like that, he was your sweet Ian. The one you fell in love with.
You smiled small, "I miss you more, bab-"
He hummed in response. "Hey, c-can you come over? I want to kiss you so bad." There was a sound in his words that, for a second, you felt as if he just needed her there for his own pleasure, not because he wanted you there.
But that all went in dust when you double thought about actually going to his apartment. You checked the clock; almost three thirty in the morning. "Why? Is something wrong? Are you okay-"
"I said come over, why do you never listen to me?" he groaned, and you could feel him roll his eyes in annoyance. "You know what? She was better anyway."
The line disconnected, and your heart dropped at what he said.
Whom was he talking about?
"She was better anyway," the words ringing in your ears.
Avoiding the voices in your head telling you about whoever he is talking about, you called him again, yet he did not answer this time. You sent him a text after another asking him to just reassure you if he is at least alright.
It sent you into panic mode as you realized he was not replying, so you thought it was better to check on him. You loved him enough to make sure he was all right. A knot twisted in your chest as you kept texting him with no answer. You bit down on your fingers, drawing blood, before throwing away the blanket and rushing to grab your jacket.
Despite everything, you was worried. It did not matter that you was exhausted from the lack of sleep; you just needed to see your boyfriend.
Right now, it does not matter that he ghosted you that day or avoided you during your own birthday party; you cared deeply about him.
Not bothering to change from your pajamas, and only took your jean jacket as you made it out the door to check on him.
