SHAMELESS (US) SENTENCE STARTERS : random quotes taken from the television show shameless (2011-). trigger warnings: the majority of these mention sexual situations, drugs, & other nsfw themes.
“doing things you don’t want to do is how you make a relationship work.”
“ninety percent of the world’s problems are caused by tiny words that come in pairs.”
“thank god i’m great at sex.”
“did the two of us finish an entire gallon of box wine the other night?”
“great things don’t happen in tiny little increments.”
“if god didn’t want us putting things up our ass he would have given the rectum a gag reflex.”
“you’re my best friend and the best fuck i ever had.”
“why was the broom late for the meeting? it overswept.”
“i was raised by a con artist, so i know one when i see one.”
“i just thought squirting was a myth, like unicorns or moderate republicans.”
“this is not a dictatorship. this is america. give me liberty or give me meth.”
“your dad made me follow you up. gave me a condom.”
“you can’t drink them away. it won’t work.”
“i believe the answer to that question, like the answer to most questions, is fuck you!”
“sometimes we get so wrapped up in getting what we want that we forget to ask ourselves why we wanted it in the first place.”
“don’t worry we’ll get dick in you as soon as we can.”
“love is not supposed to be cute.”
“love is supposed to be raw and destructive.”
“if this turns out to be a big mistake, then let’s make it the most fun big fucking mistake we’ve ever made.”
“i will make this kitchen my bitch.”
“a shrink at school says i’m one of god’s mistakes.”
“i’d be crying right now if i wasn’t so high.”
“you should never apologize for being you.”
“if how we turn out is all about how our mother is, then i’m pretty screwed, right?”
“i know who i love and i know what i want, even if you don’t.”
“you make me want to enjoy my life again.”
“the bat is for killing, not playing.”
“welcome to the predictable consequences of using crystal meth.”
“i trust you. that’s bigger to me than 'i love you’.”
“nobody is too busy. it’s just a matter of priorities.”
“i wanna tell you something, but i don’t really wanna talk about it because i’m not sure how i feel about it, and i don’t wanna be told how to feel.”
“the first rule you learn in this house — you hide the goddamn money.”
“stop behaving like the world is out to get you when it is so clearly dropping gifts at your feet.”
“it’s a fucking snickers bar!”
“you know what? nothing’s ever your problem. for once, you know, make something your problem.”
“they’re good for me — and you’re not.”