Sorority Source

Thousands of one-on-one conversations between PNMs and sisters are at the heart of every sorority recruitment. Both sides are nervous and they may have trouble making quality connections. So much is riding on these brief talks for the PNMs and the chapters. Work on improving your social skills and increase your rush week abilities dramatically! Practice making conversation at adult events and family gatherings this summer. Get comfortable with the give & take of social dialog. These sorority sugar TIPS are helpful for all recruitment participants ~ PNMs and sisters. xoxo ;)

★ Avoid These 8 Mistakes in Recruitment Conversations! ★

1. Not Listening: If you’re not ‘in the moment’ and really engaged in what’s being said, the conversation goes nowhere. It becomes two people talking “at” each other. Not listening makes for awkward, stop and start monologs that never connect in an authentic way. 

Listen! Instead of worrying about what you’re going to say next, really listen to what the other girl is saying. If you actively listen, you will pick up on clues to keep the conversation going strong. Response questions flow naturally when you take what the PNM/sister is saying and dive in deeper. 

Be interested! Ask follow-up questions. If you get a one word answer, prod a little further. Ask in a different way and show how fascinated you are. With persistence you can keep your rush conversations from being robotic. 

2. Poor Delivery: One of the most important things in a conversation is not what you say, but how you say it. Your voice quality, tempo, tone and body language is a vital part of your PNM/sister presentation. Speaking too fast, too slow, or too softly can put you at a disadvantage. A change in your speaking habits will make a big difference in your recruitment experience. 

Slow it down! You may naturally speak in a rapid fire manner. When you get excited, you speak even faster and faster. To make the best impression, please slow down and speak at a more moderate pace. This helps your conversation partner understand what you’re saying. Add small pauses between your thoughts. The PNM/sister you’re speaking with will listen more intently. The pace of your speaking is so important for recruitment success. 

Speak up! Don’t make your conversation partner fight to hear you. During rounds, the rooms are filled with hundreds of girls talking and it will get very noisy. Rush is not the place for a quite, soft spoken, shy conversation style. Speak up, speak clearly, don’t mumble and project with confidence during every talk you have. 

Speak with passion! No one will listen if you speak in a dull monotone. You must have excitement about recruitment. Let emotion show in your voice. Express your enthusiasm for the whole going greek experience. 

3. Tightening Up: Nerves can cause you to seize up. That leads to awkward conversations and weird pauses. Stress is the enemy of a relaxed, friendly rush talk. Some pre-rush preparation will help you stay calm. 

Know current events! After you’ve covered your major and hometown, there may be a lag in the conversation. If you’re struggling, discussing non-controversial events happening in the world may be a lifesaver. Before rush week, make sure you’re up on the top entertainment stories, pop culture, the latest movies, interesting news events, etc… Focus on positive stories. Being informed is a big plus and an excellent conversation backup plan. 

Imagine you’re already friends! Tell yourself that the PNM/sister you’re speaking with is a dear friend, Pretend that she’s a close girlfriend and it will put you in a cheerful state of mind. You will relax emotionally and be able to open up quickly. Act as if each PNM/sister is someone you already know and you will exude warmth. 

4. Hogging the spotlight: Interrupting the other girl while she’s talking, chattering on & on with long winded stories and always directing the attention back to you ~ are all negative conversation techniques. Avoid them. 

Find a balance between listening and talking! The goal is to not drone on endlessly and not stay too quiet either. Both extremes are bad. Your PNM/sister chats should be an even give and take. It’s not all about you, it’s about getting to know each other. 

5. Arguing: Recruitment talks are not about winning a debate. Insisting you’re right and disagreeing with a PNM/sister is not beneficial. Rush is not the time for pushing your viewpoints on others. 

Friendly topics only! Establish good vibes by sticking to light, non-controversial subjects during rush. Rounds should be full of bubbly party talk on a variety of sunny topics. Keep it upbeat. Don’t force anything dead serious into the conversation. If you hit an area of conflict, give in quickly. It’s all about getting along and remaining agreeable.   

6. Being boring: If you’re dull and have nothing to say, it will show. If you talk for ten minutes about your dorm room cleaning methods, you will put your partner to sleep. If the most exciting thing that’s happened to you recently is getting new tires on your car, you’re in trouble. You will be a recruitment drag and run out of things to say. 

Lead an interesting life! The best solution to being boring is doing things that keep you interesting. Don’t whine about your old boyfriend, or your dull classes. Instead, tell some funny stories about your latest trip, your crazy summer job, or the goofy times you have with your friends. Go to concerts, play sports, read good books ~ DO things that make you unique and fascinating. 

7. Talking about weird or negative things: When you first meet a PNM/sister, it’s not the time to burden her with your family drama, your interest in spiders, your foot warts, or tales of the worst meals you’ve ever eaten. Unpleasant subjects taint the entire mood of the conversation. 

Avoid unhappy talk! Stay away from religion, politics, serial killers, substance abuse, death, break ups, divorce, sickness, failure and other unhappy subject matters. No dark, depressing, “worst ever” style stories please. There is a time and a place for sharing upsetting or unusual things, but recruitment is not one of them. Stick to sharing the brightest parts of your life. This will bathe you in a positive light. 

8. Limiting yourself to only one topic: If you can only talk about your computer skills or your horse - and nothing else - you will be in trouble. Everyone has a favorite topic that they love to chat about easily and often. But for recruitment, conversing about a wide variety of interests is a must. Being “one note” is not desirable for PNMs or sisters. 

Open up! Get comfortable talking about many different things. Don’t desperately cling to only your comfort zone. A good conversationalist will flow from subject to subject with ease. You don’t have to know everything about each topic, just be relaxed about discussing all kinds things with PNMs/sisters. Share your thoughts, ask questions, reciprocate, contribute and you will learn soooo much during rush week. It’s exciting to be genuinely curious when you’re talking to new people. Open your eyes and your heart. It will help you become a better PNM/sister.