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Nonny ily, sometimes I come into my inbox and see this and just feel all warm and fuzzy. I apologize to you and to the rest of my readers for being terrible at updates, but I promise I’ve been slowly but surely getting my muse back, there will definetely be an update sometime soon. (it has been waaayyy too long).

Of course! I won’t go into spoilers but basically it’s about Bucky’s time with hydra and the process of them training him (it involves the reader) to work for them after scooping out all his memories. I don’t plan to be too detailed when it comes to the gorey stuff. And the reader, the main perspective, is kept apart from the main process so the fic mainly deals with the immediate aftermath, trauma, fear and occasional injury from both of them. It’s set before CATWS so it’s basically pre-canon (hence the name), and tbh the ending is not a happy one, not a sad one either it’s just fairly open. If any of this would keep you from reading don’t worry, they’ll be other fics and I would really rather you put your mental health first ♥︎

I fully intend to complete it, I have many ideas for it and have been going back to the document often, especially in the last couple of weeks. I am aware that it has been a long ass time and that I am in what I hate to call a hiatus but really is. The last few months and even years have been... rough to say the least. I won’t bore you with the details but my mental health has definitely taken a hit, this blog and others I manage kinda fell into the background and I went back to lurking without producing any content. I barely had enough energy to open and reblog stuff and my few active burst have been thanks to the queue I’d set up on my good days so... yeah, I wasn’t great. I love writing though, and although I’m not trying to make excuses that whole thing was what pulled me away from it. Assuming anyone is still interested (thanks to this ask I know at least one person still is, which is all I ask for) then I will continue to kick my own ass until I can write something that I can post again.

I don’t really have a Dean tag anymore but I added you to the SPN one, I mostly write for him anyway :))