SUPERBOY !

and now i'm mad because this genuinely might be the best issue of this run i've read so far. let's start by doing the MUCH NEEDED: giving the artists their flowers. clay mann, travis moore, and tomeu morey did a HUGE one with this. i'm not too familiar with their work beyond this run but they've left a good impression on me with the beautiful panels in this.

THE WAY IT SAYS HEROES IN CRISIS. HOLY SHIT.

i haven't posted or talked about my love for booster gold that much beyond my review of this run, but i really DO love blue and gold's whole thing together. this. this panel and the conversation that followed nearly made me forget my previous grievances with the past issues.

the punchy one-liners are less present in this issue, which i think is what makes this more tolerable. also! the framing for the events that take place here? wonderful.

sometimes heroes in crisis is kind of confusing in both intentional and non-intentional ways. this one? does not suffer from creating unintentional confusion. the issue tackles three different scenes all happening in different places that coincide, but the transitions felt smooth. again, i will credit format of the panels and the art which i think really carried the story for me.

here's the basics of what goes on so i can yap further: on top of the sanctuary interviews/therapy sessions sprinkled in between, the three events in this issue are booster and ted going to barry to steal the info he has on the case, harley and batgirl teaming up to interrogate skeets to find booster, and superman giving the speech to calm the public down because everyone is reasonably freaking the FUCK out. out of all the little plots going in this issue, the harley and batgirl one is written the worst. it just feels off tonally.

there's also! batman.

i don't like the way tom king wrote batman in this issue, but it's forgivable because he's hardly there. i think we're supposed to understand that he's going through his neurotic spiral of NEEDING to detective this shit out because he feels like he should have been prepared for it, which is currently resulting in him seeming detached and kind of... nothingburger?? but whatever, okay, that's in character enough, i'll read it as a character moment for him. the lines he drops are meh. but i will ignore that.

but i realized while re-reading it, my main problem isn't with the way batman's written. right now: it's diana. then again, tom king is writing so i guess the fork has been found in the kitchen. but here's my thing: superman does his whole huge speech (which was written pretty good, no complaints) but diana is literally doing about as much as a cardboard cutout. for a run that is supposed to connect with the heroes and their inner turmoil, diana is there to stand in support and place a hand on clark's shoulder when he gets emotional mid speech. mm. wow.

the speech, again. fine. some absolutely WONDERFUL art behind it.

enjoy the very low res version i have provided you with (sorry).

anyways, let's go back to booster.

i love this panel.

and i enjoy the fact that booster and ted are on the case + booster isn't being lobotomy gold rn. like yay! he's not perfectly incompetent! i like clowning on him, but i think we miss a lot of dimension to his character when he's just dumb and silly with nothing else. for a run that's supposed to center him, this stuff is exactly what i wanted from him in the prev issues, even if he wasn't front and center to prove that he can Do Things, i think he needed to be a smidge less 2d. am i making sense?

anyway, he's the one who points out that, HEY! the wally that died is 5 days too old. suspicious. and then harley and barbara burst into the room. cool.

this issue is making me understand why people say that it's meant to be read in tpb format but here's MY argument: to some extent, comic issues are supposed to be able to stand on their own. it's the beauty of the issue by issue format. and yet, every bit of tom king's writing seems to protest against this idea wholeheartedly. you read some of the prev and it feels like nothing, or like you're army crawling through quicksand trying to get to something better, and then you hit this issue and go "FINALLY!!!" but idk if comic issues should feel like that.

i don't have a lot to nitpick with this one on it's own, which is lovely, but it makes the bigger problem stand out to me: the pacing of this run is lowkey wack.

you might be able to tell i don't edit these review.

i have to pick up issue #4. this is followed immediately after 3 even though i wanted to space it out. i just feel like the last three went in circles. so here's to hoping it'll be different!

i need a palate cleanser and a strong drink after this.

clay mann and tomeu morey need their flowers for the gorgeous art. i will say, through everything, i've been having an absolutely stellar time staring at these pages.

i understand how donna's little sanctuary segment bleeds into the events happening now(ish) but i'm also kind of sad we're not really getting much more out of these characters. hm.

the synopsis i've read for this run made it seem like it was going to be super introspective: all about the mental burdens that someone doing hero work might carry and all that jazz. unfortunately, i'm staring at these pages blankly. i don't feel very strongly at all.

i don't know whether to blame king's dialogue or my callousness because i'm BEGGING the story to move. let me breathe.

tom king would rather write another fuck ass one-liner instead of a full story.

sorry. moving on! less bitterly this time.

stuff is actually moving. booster recounts his sitch to diana, lois and clark talk about the leaked hero info she's getting from the puddler (of course with fan service to distract from the fact the writing is CHEEKS) and. ok. sure.

i can't make this shit up the pages on my physical thrifted issue were STUCK TOGETHER on the barbara gordon page. holy fucking shit. i can't move. please don't tell me i bought a copy someone JIZZED ON.

anyways here are the infamous panels of batgirl flashing her bullet wound and egregious amounts of ASSCHEEK. i read these before and genuinely didn't see anything wrong with it, but i realize now that i am deeply asexual. and yes. this is hella misplaced fanservice. aka misogyny. but ok fuck it we ball and continue.

IT WAS LITERALLY STUCK TOFUCKINGETHER.

i suffer for this blog in ways i didn't think i would.

dullest fight scene in the world while barbara goes "shawdy... ahaha this isn't youuuu..."

dinah leaves her sanctuary segment. cool. whatever.

ted kord fine as hell.

happy pride month.

somewhere in hell, the penny plunderer wept out loud.

THE COOLEST PAGE WE GOT IS THE ARTICLE LOIS WROTE ABOUT SANCTUARY. we've got some drama between the trinity members but i'm lowkey thinking abt it at half capacity becuz i feel like they're gonna be doing this a LOTTT. that aside... yay. cool page layout.

babs gets intel abt the article, harley is like "whatever yaaay :-D" and it ends on a one-liner.

YOU THOUGHT I WOULDN'T CONTINUE!!! and you're right! i nearly didn't! but i forced my friends to hold me accountable, so here i am, reading issue three.

we're back and i'm not screenshotting panels right now because i don't have anything new to say. everyone sounds the same here with no distinct character voices, but there isn't much i can do from here.

wally's here! which. we know will change. this is before he got slimed out.

booster gold receeding hairline strikes again.

like. yeah.

ok i read the entire thing and i'm genuinely understanding why people say he writes for the tpb and not the issue. like yeah, this'll bridge things later in the story but. the issues have to be stories itself.

i just feel kinda like "oh ok. i see where that is there. and where we're going i think. anyway!"

but you know. whatever. is this a sign to reach for the next?

okay! issue two.

we're starting strong with a sanctuary interview with poison ivy!

i'm yuriful. in terms of actual writing and story happening, her tone is kind of off and i'm feeling like the way ivy describes herself is kind of ooc but. whatever. it's two panels worth of dialogue i'm being picky over!! let's move on.

OSWALD FEATURE. sorry i'm literally starving for penguin stuff right now. as of recent, i've been loving him quite a bit.

tom king does this thing where he makes wonder woman glaze batman in like. the most annoying ways. and it's rearing it's head RIGHT NOW BUT let me shut my mouth because this is somewhat passable. yes. he's batman. easy to suspect this.

i'm kind of mad that this art is so nice.

SKEETS FEATURE I'M SO EXCITED. unironically i really enjoy skeets as a character. i don't know why i'm wired this way. but he's a good friend for booster's hijinks.

mr gold ur cuteness will not save you from my reviewing wrath. i'm thoroughly endeared by him always. i just kind of love booster gold and harley though so. my bias will be awful.

why would she let this happen. let me chill. <- would totally fold if harley stumbled into my arms. diana sharing the hug though is really cutiepilled. even if it's lowkenuinely STUPID.

my issue is that DIANA WOULD NEVER LET THAT FUCKING HAPPEN TO HER. clark and bruce watching and this happens i'm actually in tears bro. but okay. okay. fine. honestly idm batman specifically getting his ass beat by harley.

and obviously there's fucking kryptonite in batman's bat-belt. but no, we have to let this fact throw them all off-kilter. OKAY. okay. sure. yes. that's fine.

end the one-liners. take them away. stop.

right let's all make booster gold also dumb as bricks. that's. ok. actually i don't mind this THAT much but skeets having to be like "shut up" throughout makes it Not Funny and just makes booster seem STUPID AS HELL. like. like. HMMNGGH. ok whatever.

AND OBVIOUSLY HE'S GOING TO GET HIS ASS BEAT.

harley has a moment. sigh. ivy. i'm sad ivy isn't here.

is it really hot in the daily planet. do they have a really lax dress code. or are we dressing lois like that for the sake of the fans.

these are genuine questions that i'm asking, but i don't know how to sound any less sarcastic about it because tone is hard to convey over text. just imagine me being this emoji. right now. -> 🤔 ?

got to clark's interview at the end and i'm noticing something i can't really unnotice: everyone TALKS THE FUCKING SAME IN THIS COMIC. NOBODY REALLY SOUNDS LIKE THEMSELVES. harley's dialogue is off (save for a few moments), booster is kind of being dummy-fied but. everyone almost talks the same. clark is pausing and speaking in the same way that harley was speaking when talking abt ivy's death. same dramatic pauses for emphasis, same pattern of repitition for impact when it doesn't really fit??

ok. that's ok.

i'm done the comic.