R Y A N

“You’re not one yet but we’ll make you one just like me. If you’re worried about how people will react, don’t. You’re my son, you’re like me. Powers, looks, hair…everything. They’ll love it and they’ll love you. As for the name, I was thinking we should make it relate to mine to help you out. You have to decide soon before it’s too late. Why wouldn’t you want any of this?”

"I don’t think I’ll be as powerful as you.” For some reason he thought that was the right thing to say and felt safer because of it. He wasn’t sure why. “It isn’t how people will react, it is how I will. I’m so confused over what happened to me, what happened between you and my Mom and everything else. I guess I’m just not sure if all the superhero stuff is worth it.”

“Because that’s what they have to tell you.” Lexi looks at him. “It varies from situation to situation, okay? Sometimes more people are killed than are saved.” She runs a hand through her hair, almost feeling guilty for bursting this kid’s bubble. She shakes her head slightly at the mention of Essex being cool. “He’s dangerous…. there’s something off about him. I trust him about as far as I can throw him.” She rolls her eyes slightly. 

"I’ll believe my Dad and he trusts them so I will.” Ryan wanted to do everything like his dad and be as great as he was. If Homelander wanted to trust Vought then Ryan would. He’d do anything his dad did. “If Essex was a bad person then he wouldn’t be at Vought.”

         Becca knew it wasn’t but his words sounded like an accustation and that was breaking her heart. After so little time, Vought had their claws deep into her son and changed him from the sweet unknowing kid to someone she wasn’t sure about. “A lot of people love your dad,” she said not saying anything about her disappearance, “and I like him.” Not love. Not by a long shot. “I was in a desperate situation that nobody could help with except them. Your Dad might have helped but I didn’t know and I was scared.”

Ryan didn’t want to hurt his mom but he couldn’t help what he was thinking or saying. “I don’t care about a lot of people, mom. I only care about my family. Just like? I always thought parents loved each other but you weren’t married to him so I guess you didn’t love him.” He didn’t care about it too much. “You should have spoken with him. I could have grown up with him.”

Lexi doesn’t meet his eyes as she talks. “People get hurt and people die while the supes are out there ‘saving’ the world. Someone has to hide that mess and make sure that people don’t find out.” She shrugs again. “Maybe, I don’t know. Ask some of his teammembers. Ask Essex… I don’t know.” 

"The people at my dads work told me that some people get hurt and die but its a small amount compared to how many is saved and that he saves so many everyday.” Before he knew Homelander was his Dad, he still defended him to the kids on the school yard who said Homelander wasn’t their favourite. “Essex is really cool. I thought he was a supe at frist but he isn’t. He’s just clever.”

          It was hard to be honest with him as he was growing up because of all the complications and NDA as well as all the Vought stuff. Instead of honesty or lies, she’d just evaded questions. “What have you noticed?” she asked worried. “I wanted to give you a normal life or as much of one as I could given your abilities. Vought wanted that to an extent but they wanted to see if raising you away from Vought would make you different to your Dad. It’s just a guess because I wasn’t told anything. I just had to go away in exchange for them helping me.”

"Nothing much.” Nothing he understood. “There’s people at Vought that say it is weird you’re suddenly back after a long time away and there are people at Vought that don’t really like my Dad. I thought everyone loved him. Even you.” Normal this, normal that. He’d heard that a lot growing up. “Why did you agree to hide if they didn’t tell you anything? My Dad would have helped you.” Homelander was always his hero.

“Maybe?” Homelander repeated but his face looked like he smelt something foul. “It is a huge step but one you are born for. Who you are is a superhero and not just any superhero. My kid. That is more power than anyone else other than me.”

Ryan felt like a kid that had just said something bad at school. “I don’t think I am a superhero. I still all weird and confused after everything that has just happened to me. C’mon, I don’t even a supe name or know what I can do. How about we just do the thing where I learn and decide later? We have loads of time for me to decide.”

“You’ll want it,” he remarked wondering why anyone could want anything else other than everything that came with being a superhero. The money was great but the rest of it was great as well. “That’s how I learned. When I was growing up there was nobody even close to me that could do what I could. You’ve got an amazing opportunity.”

"Maybe,” he said with a little bit of fake enthusiasm, “I just want to discover more of what I can do before I join any group. It’s a huge step for me.” The Seven was filled with the greatest and Ryan was so beginner he was intimidated. “I wanna find out who I am before I join a group.”

“Kinda.” Lexi sighs. “I help them maintain that sparking public image you see. If anything goes south I have to help cover it up. I sit behind a screen and manipulate the general public.” She says quietly, the weight of what she actually does slowly sinking in. The woman shrugs. “I’m just neutral on him, I guess. He’s good at his job, I guess, but other than that I don’t have much to say on him.” She doesn’t have the heart to tell him that the niceness is just out of fear because they know Homelander could kill them on the spot, and the same could be said about Ryan. 

Ryan was listening eagerly to everything she said even if he didn’t understand it even a little. “Stuff goes south?” he asked full of bewilderment. Even though she said it quietly, he heard her because of the abilities he inherited. “I understand that. I was hoping there’d be more but I get it. Guess everyone here will say the same.”

        “What? Why are you asking that? It’s about Vought as an entire situation, your dad was just one part of it but that part is between me and him. It isn’t for anyone else.” Billy was included in that but she wasn’t sure for how long. “They hid us away because they where worried about what we would do to their influence over your dad. It wasn’t to be kind or good.”

"I just wanted to know. I notice stuff y’know, Mom. I heard that you used to be married when you met my Dad and then you had to go away when I was born and be away from everyone. Why was that?” There was so much of his own life that he didn’t know. “I was a baby, how could I be influence over anyone?”

The arrogance of this kid was unbelievable. He had done nothing with his powers yet and didn’t even have a fucking supe name and here he stood, thinking he was above them all. Nepotism at its finest. “You won’t need anything like the points for now, you’re a fucking novice.” The Deep laughed at the boy. He was nothing now, just a boy dreaming of the big leagues. “They won’t have two supes in the same group. If you join the seven then your dad will go to pay back.”

"That’s not what the guys upstairs said. They said something about me getting a few points per whatever. I didn’t listen. I was just wanting to get started and they seemed more than helpful. The Seven is my place, not any of the others.” Ryan didn’t even want to be in the Seven or was unsure if it was something he wanted or not. “They might do. I can be in there when my Dad wants to step down. Saves finding a replacement and he isn’t going to leave any time soon or if ever. He is the Seven.”

         A few times she’d gotten that sigh from him but he’d only been a kid then and it was about stuff that wasn’t important like tidying his room or doing chores. This was a lot more than that. “I used to think I knew what they where doing but it turned out I didn’t. These people, Vought, they are cunning and they know how to work people and supes.”

"Do you mean with my Dad?” All Ryan knew about his parents was that they are his parents. Nothing about their relationship past or anything else. “You worked for them and they looked after us when I was a kid, they aren’t bad. They just want to help us.”

“Yeah, but you’ll need someone to clean up the mess after you do whatever the hell you want.” Lexi snorts. There was no denying Ryan was definitely Homelander’s kid. She shakes her head in disgust as she listens to what Ryan had been through at the hands of Essex. “Sounds like a great guy.” She mutters sarcastically before shrugging. “What do you want me to say? He hasn’t given me a reason to have a negative thing to say about him, or an overwhelmingly positive thing to say either. We keep it incredibly professional.” She keeps her eyes on the water. “No reason to get all personal with him, you know?” 

"Is that what you do?” He wasn’t fully understanding what she meant about the situation but he could tell it wasn’t good. “I like him, he’s always been nice to me since I was a kid. I don’t get why everyone seems not like the guy. He even helped me with these headaches I used to get.” Ryan didn’t know what he wanted to hear about his Dad but he was starting to get the impression Lexi wasn’t as enthralled as most people. “Everyone says everything positive about him, even the people that don’t him.”

“They’ll aways be room for you in the Seven especially if you are anything like your old man!” It was the first time in a long time that Homelander was actually genuine and not his normal fake PR self. That created a weird feeling. “The Seven can be a great way to learn about your abilities. What do you want to do first?”

Ryan smiled but it was uncomfortable. “I don’t know if I want that. I might just wanna be a kid and see what I can do, y’know? I just don’t think learning on the job would be the best thing. I’m so new to all this. A few days ago I was Eight.”

Homelander never did the movies and Queen Maeve’s sold well but everyone always went to the Deeps. Rising Tide smashed every record and vought was happy with him then. Now, no movies had been mentioned but at least he still had his endorsements. “He does some stuff but I bring in a lot of the money.” The Deep tried to sound impressive but the kid was right, Homelander did almost everything and right now The Deep was benched. “I have something, if you’re joining the seven then they’ll get rid of your dad and he’s not the type of guy to go quietly.” The Deep could see Homelander becoming a villain before they replaced him.

"He does.” It was kinda like the my dad is bigger than your dad argument on the playground that he was not able to take part in himself. “The finance guys where talking to me about the point thing,” but he didn’t really understand it, “and they said he makes the most. C’mon, they’ll never get rid of Homelander and if I join they’ll be having us everywhere. They’ll still need you Oceanland and that place is great. Mom used to take me, It was the coolest!”

       "He isn’t good but he will try and manipulate you to think he is, to make out that he is your friend or has your interests at heart when it doesn’t. The only one that does is me and it’s always been me. Always will be.” The stuff about Homelander threw her a little bit. “Ryan…you know why I couldn’t tell you. The situation was complicated and I couldn’t say anything because of it and because Vought made it so I couldn’t legally tell you or anyone.”

"Mom,” he began with an irritated sigh, “I can make up my own mind about people. I’m not a kid anymore and I’m not blind to see what people are doing. I know what everyone will be like with me because of who my dad is. You say you have my best interest but I do and I wanna figure out what I want. Maybe it is the Seven maybe it is something completely different. It’s my choice.”