我回忆起我是谁。

“I already know what’s wrong with you. You’re unhappy. You’re isolated. You think you’re the cause of this unhappiness and are unworthy of affection so you have few friends. Recently you lost something you think very important - your lover? Your faith? your family? Or all three. You blame yourself for this so its makes you neurotic and you don’t sleep, and don’t eat… anything healthy anyway. You used to take care of your appearance but you’ve lost interest in that so you avoid mirrors. Sunlight bothers you so you avoid that too, about which you feel guilty because you think it’s unhealthy even immoral not to like the sun. You’re not a woman of convention or you wouldn’t be here. But you like to pretend you are, so that people don’t notice you. But you sometimes like that as well and can dress to draw the eye. But then you think the men that look at you are fools, or worse, to be taken in by such an outward obvious show. So instead you’re drawn to dark, complicated, impossible men, assuring your own unhappiness and isolation because, after all, you are happiest alone. But not even then. Because you can’t stop thinking about what you’ve lost, again for which you blame yourself. So the cycle goes on… the snake eating its own tail.”

“I’m afraid of a lot of things, but mostly, most sincerely, I am afraid of being completely unraveled by you, and you finding nothing you want in here.”