SocialWorkerOneDay

Don’t be unrealistic with your goals. You know how much work you can do in one evening and what other things you have to do in the day.

Try to do your homework at the same time in evening or morning; this will make the work seem less taxing because you were already expecting to do it.

Before you start your work each day write down a list of what you need to achieve in order of importance, if you can also try to give a time frame to accomplish each task.

Make monthly and weekly goals so you know what to achieve.

A timetable is a great way to get stuff achieved during the day because it gives you a good idea of when your breaks are.

Try to revise your notes from class at least once a week. This is a great way to get revision done so there is less for you to do before your exam.

Get a study buddy; this could be a friend from school or a family member who can make sure that you are on top of your homework and goals. They could send you a text when it is time to start working or to give you some motivation when you are feeling down.

Totally cool: “Hey, do you want to be exclusive?”

Red flag: “No one but me is allowed to touch you.”

Totally cool: “It makes me feel weird when you flirt with other people, can we talk about that?”

Red flag: “If you loved me, you would stop being friends with them. You KNOW it makes me jealous.”

Totally cool: “I hope we’re together forever. I’m so in this for the long haul.”

Red flag: “If you ever left me, I would kill myself.”

Totally cool: “Your mom is really unkind to me, can we try to minimize how often you bring me when you visit her?”

Red flag: “Your mom hates me, you need to stop talking to her. She’s trying to ruin our relationship.”

Totally cool: “I love you so much, oh my god.”

Red flag: “It’s a good thing I love you so much, because no one else would. You’d be alone forever without me.”

Other important red flags to keep in mind: someone who wants to jump into emotional/financial co-dependence very fast (like moving in together right away, or becoming each other’s only confidantes right away) and won’t take no for an answer; someone who tries to minimize how often you leave the house or interact with other people; someone who threatens you or themselves or your family or pets or possessions or financial future; someone who uses guilt to keep you from leaving a relationship.

Very important reminder: You do not need a reason to leave a relationship. Neither does the other person (or people). A relationship is over when one of the people in it says it’s over, period. Obviously it’s kind to take the end of a long relationship seriously, but abusers and manipulators have lost the right to that conversation. Lie if you need to–your safety is much more important than their feelings.