becoming african american

Welcome to America my friend.

You are now part of a people of pride, who struggle, embrace, empower, and progress. No injustice, even unfair, can stop the soul of African American. Trust this statement as you are now a part of our culture. know that you have been endowed you with a responsibility. Indoctrinated by great African American leaders with hope and dreams of a people that want to find there roots. As you are bequeathed with this responsibility of progress, it will be faced with adversity. Because we are still struggling, still fighting, still dreaming. My life has been an active struggle because the America I liven in does not want my culture as a representation of its identity. I recently spoke with a  couple who truly believed that black people are born “ violent and inferior”. It is unfair that people have the right to fill this way because of my skin. So unfair that my people are spoken about in terms of eugenics. Because the people I love, the individuals who nurtured me are no such thing. So you will walk into this country with expectations received from an America that disenfranchise its blacks, however, know that the truth picture is painted beautifully. No matter where you come from. You are African American when you touch this soul. Remember this and take pride in it. 

So I ask you to be strong and do not stereotype. Us or them. “Them” fear you and need to restrict you. “Them” as a group are bigots, racist, and preach there superiority. Only align yourself with those that do not follow these infliction’s. They will look to hurt you with small voices and sharp words. Use your ornate ability to recognize injustice when it is happening because you will experience injustice everyday. My experience in the country that loves and hates me is I have to show love even when faced with true adversity. My love is through my actions. My love is demonstrated by breaking stereotypes, and being a man of character. Because being African Americans is full of virtue and love. So I must love by leading.  What I have learned as a African American is I must be a lover in the face of darkness. Because when you live in a place where friends and family are hurt, belittled, and humiliated, you want nothing more than to hurt people back. In this moment you are asked to make a choice.Because the burdens of the world is placed at Atlas feet. That responsibility and burden is unfairly rested on you. For that I am sorry. However, Struggle towards greatness knowing you have great people, amazing history, and a culture with an unbreakable soul.  I will struggle with you. So I ask you to find your answer and direction in this society. During your quest to find answers, do not let the hatred subvert your views. You are stronger than that. Let the pain be your fuel. Let the pain help you become better. Sadly, your path will be littered with struggle. Forcing you chose compassion, not for “them” but for you. Because I believe that as an African American who faces all the pain and neglect open your third eye and change this world. 

So, I hope you choose to grow and love those who do not understand. I hope you fight with us because the success of the African American is the success of all cultures in this country.  Finally,I hope you speak to me soon and look forward to the great you will do for this country. Even though America is a place that does want to cherish our history, it is still our home and I ,nor you, should let anything in this country move forward without the beauty and influence of the African American. 

With love and respect,

Marcus Garvey aka Black Moses

I talk and write about race, a lot. It permeates every facet of my life. I cannot escape being Black, even if I wanted to. I have always been race conscious, known who I am, and where I stand in the world. However, everything changed for me during the Trayvon Martin trial. I saw not only how much vocal support George Zimmerman received from people, but also how much money was donated to protect a child killer. From that moment on, my world was shaken and I became almost hyper-sensitive towards race. From reading literary greats such as Toni Morrison and James Baldwin to present day brilliant sociologists like Cornell West and Dr. Tommy Curry, I have learned quite a bit about race in America. Along with my personal experiences as a 37-year-old black man in America, I wanted to share with you 10 unfortunate, but true lessons I have learned being Black.

By: LeRon Barton / The Good Men Project

October 9, 2015

Respectability Politics will not save us – There is an unfortunate belief in the Black community that if you dress a certain way, i.e. wear a suit instead of baggy jeans, a v-neck sweater instead of a hoodie, and a collared shirt with a tie instead of a t-shirt you will be immune from racism. This is rooted in a belief called, “Respectability Politics” or “Look at us, we are normal law abiding citizens just like you white people.” Attorney and bestselling author Lawrence Otis Graham famously dressed his kids preppy to protect them from racism, but they were still called “nigger.” A Black man in a suit is looked at the same as a Black man in a hoodie – a threat. Eric Garner is just as dead as Martin Luther King Jr. Speaking of MLK…

MLK is dead – In many of her essays on race, Dr. Stacey Patton brilliantly remarks, “white America has a necrophilia type relationship with Martin Luther King Jr.” Today America loves to laud MLK and promote his message of togetherness and unity, especially in light of the nationwide responses and protests to police terrorism. However, when King was alive, he was looked at differently. In 1966, two years before MLK was killed, a Gallup poll showed that 66% of America viewed him unfavorably. This is a stark contrast to many whites telling Blacks who want justice behind the murders of Freddie Gray and Mike Brown to “Be like MLK,” and forgive and love everyone.

The sound of the police – Being pulled over by a police officer while driving is an unfortunate fact of life for a Black person. If you are driving it is inevitable. You can be the absolute best driver: traveling at the correct speeds, using your turn signals properly, and stopping at the stop sign perfectly. However, if you are DWB (driving while Black), you are susceptible to the flashing lights in the rearview mirror. I’ve been stopped by police so many times I no longer question if it is my mediocre driving skills. I know why I’m being stopped. It is what it is.

Being the spokesperson for all Black people – This is also a regular occurrence in my life. Whenever I am in a work meeting, attend a social event, or any gathering of large amounts of people, I am usually one of the few, if not the only, Black person in the room. It is something that I have gotten used to. With that usually being the case, many whites also feel that I am the “Go-to Black person” or “Black representative” when they are curious about African American culture and stereotypes. You would not believe the asinine questions I get asked; it would boggle your mind. I just politely, remind them that “All Negroes are not the same. We don’t all act like the Lyon family from ‘Empire’.” We are not a homogenous bunch. Speaking of that…

Black people are not homogeneous – When I was younger I used to think that all Black people were aligned together against issues like racism, gender discrimination, and police terrorism, but that has been disproven. For every Cornell West and Jesse Williams who address racism and justice for all, there is a Herman Cain and Dr. Ben Carson pushing respectability politics, side stepping racism as if it does not exist. They espouse “rugged individualism,” a term my father taught me that means only doing for self and not your people. Some Black people don’t have interests in talking and discussing racism, or talking about police brutality. Some don’t even believe it is a problem; case in point a discussion I had with a fellow African American. He and I talked about the murder of Eric Garner. I said, “The police had no right to kill an unarmed man that was not doing anything.”  He says, “Well he shouldn’t have resisted.” I replied, “Garner was not resisting.” My then-friend followed up with, “Well, police never mess with me. I don’t give them a reason.” I was shocked and just shook my head.

The purse clutch – Every Black man has experienced this. You are walking down the street, minding your own business, engrossed in your Beats by Dre headphones and you see a white woman walking near. You smile, not wanting to be looked at as the confrontational or scary Black person, but to her you are anyway and she does the “purse clutch “ (sounds like a dance right? Do the purse clutch!). This is when a white woman grabs her purse in fear that you are going to snatch it from her hands. I have had this happen to me since I was very young. I’ve seen women clutch their purse in the street as I walk by, the movie theater as I pass through the aisle, and the elevator when I get on. It’s as if some believe Black men are all robbers or thieves. I even experienced this with a suit on. As I said in truth #1, it does not matter what you wear, you are still Black. Nowadays I cross the street if I can or if I am in an elevator, I move to the far opposite side. I want to avoid that experience because every time it happens, a piece of my heart breaks.

Am I a fetish? – I have this conversation every so often with friends who are in interracial relationships. We wonder, “Is the person with me because they like me or because I represent some kind of fantasy or fetish for them?” I have been on dates with white women and have been told, “I always wanted to know what it was like to be with a brother.” Comments like those and “once you go Black, you never go back” or does he have a BBC (use your imagination) have come up among my friends and I, so a person being sexually desired because of their race is not far-fetched.

I always feel like somebody’s watching me – I cannot count how many times I am shopping in a department, electronic, and even convenient stores and I am slyly or blatantly followed by a store employee. I could be browsing suits to buy, looking for an iPhone 6, or even a case of the midnight munchies. If I turn around, there is an employee “hanging out” or fixing the merchandise…just in case I have a question. The most infamous time was when I had just moved to San Diego and went grocery shopping. As I was putting items in my grocery basket, a store clerk came right up to me and said, “Yeah that’s right, I am following you. I think you have been stealing.” That was my first and last time ever in that grocery store.

Just because someone is LGBTQ, that doesn’t mean they are not racist – When I moved to San Francisco, I thought it was a liberal bastion. I heard The City was progressive, that everyone is accepting of everything, and home to a large LGBTQ population. And since the LGBTQ community has been historically discriminated against, I thought they couldn’t possibly be racist. Wrong, so wrong. Many of my gay friends who are not white tell me stories of discrimination and racism in their community. From barring entry into many gay night clubs and bars, being reduced to racial-sexual stereotypes (see #7), and an indifference to the Black and Latino plight. A friend of mine summed it up by saying: “Just because men sleep with other men and women sleep with other women, that doesn’t mean they don’t practice racism/white supremacy.”

Anti-Blackness in Black communities – I define Anti-Blackness as disdain and distancing yourself from anything that can be considered Black. This belief is held throughout the world. In every ethnicity, the darker the person the more discrimination he or she faces. Unfortunately, this also pops up in Black communities such as Puerto Rican, Dominican, Cuban, and Brazilian, as many will deny their African roots. What many don’t understand is that during the Trans-Atlantic Slave Trade, many boats carrying Black slaves went to other places besides the United States: Puerto Rico, Dominican Republic, Cuba, and Brazil. Also, I have seen Anti-Blackness manifest in many African communities in the United States. Some African immigrants will try and distance themselves from American-born Blacks, saying that we are lazy, criminals, and have no morals. I worked with a guy from Kenya that when asked about this ethnicity, he would immediately say, “I am not African American, I am African. I am not like them in America.” Darn, even some Black folks in Africa don’t want to be considered Black .

Hello I Kara Hawkins,

Born and raised in Indianapolis, Indiana. I would like to share with you my perspective being born and raised in the United States as an African-American. You must not feel the need to prove yourself.  You must not be so full of culture and pride that you need to force it one others. You must simply be yourself, confident determined and proud: not obnoxious, cocky or “know it all”, for this attitude is not what make your experience in America with Americans easier but give them the perception that you are in a country you chose to come to…that you are acting as if you don’t need.  Be compassion Be willing to embrace and understand others who are not like you. You don’t have to be “the African” “the black person” Establish yourself in your school, your community and your workplace as a person and you will be treated as a such. Seen not by your color/background but by your character and potential. If you harbor the mindset that people of other race are racist, evil and hateful you are contributing to the same mindset that they have, which isn’t conducive to anyone. Live your life changing what you can and inspiring what needs to be. You don’t always have to fight or argue: for not every battle is yours to fight! America as a country has its triumphs and hurdles as every country does but wake up with a positive outlook and mind to know that you must be inspired by greatest and become strong by what is not. Think daily…if we all were to become the same race how would we differentiate one another…! I love being black in America…but I love even more being Kara walking this beautiful world and that’s the bigger picture! I share my thoughts, life and knowledge on my social media accounts if you would like to stay in touch or keep up with an African-Americans life in the United States feel free to follow me if you would like! If you follow or reach out please inform me who you are and if you are also helping and sharing with my friend Kris in his experiment! 

God Bless you all.

Hello! I guess I'll just dive right into my answer. Sorry in advance for the length! Here it goes:

From growing up a shy and more privileged than I'm willing to admit young African American, to becoming a young African American women working in corporate America I must say that my take on being "Black in America" has evolved greatly. I'm willing to say that it will always be evolving as long as there is humanity. Because humanity and society are complex and things are ever changing.

To understand where I'm at now it would help to understand where I came from. I was born in Manhattan, NY to Ed and Janel Adams. They were married when they had me. My mom might have been 26 and I believe my dad might have been 31. My mom was working as a Legal Secretary (that's been her job her whole life) and my dad was in radio sales. I'm willing to say they were doing pretty great for where they were at in life. Both had jobs making decent money. Had an apartment, soon to buy a condo. Both very friendly, and outgoing, got along well with people. Neither of them drink or smoke, or ever did any drugs. Just two by the book, intelligent, successful African American parents. They actually both came from almost nothing and you would never believe it. My dad always mentions that someone once commented, "You must have grown up around white people," but my dad had actually grown up around black people, a majority of them drug abusers. 

Anyway my parents remained successful and sweet and friendly throughout my life. They raised me on the same beliefs that they had. Some golden rules like: Treat people the way you want to be treated. If you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all. Speak when spoken to. Respect your elders. All these rules, combined with the area that I grew up in kept me out of trouble. 

To this day I've never had any issues with law enforcement. I've even gotten out of more speeding tickets or citations than I actually have on record. The only record that I actually do have is for driving the opposite way on a one way road one day (I was confused) and that ticket was issued to me by an African American officer. With that being said I think my experiences have been different from other experiences had by African Americans across the United States. 

What might be worth mentioning is the fact that I've had family members serve work in law enforcement. Which might have been why I was biased in the past when it comes to interactions with the law. I used to think that if anyone got in trouble with the law it was due to their actions. Something that they were doing landed them in trouble and they deserved to be in the position that they're in. Recently, I've been enlightened on certain situations across the nation involving law enforcement and the minority community. The facts are clear. People of color are targeted because there are preconceived notions of how they act or how they will act. How are these preconceived notions created? Skin color. Something that you can't help unless you're Michael Jackson. 

But skin color isn't the only thing that factors into why certain people are targeted in this country. If you really want to get a clear scope of the situation you have to go all the way back to times of slavery and really dissect how that affected the way white people act towards black people. They've always had a one up on us and they still do. They were slave masters, but now they are shop owners, presidents, and law enforcement. At the top of most corporations in America there sits a white man. A white man whose success was created because of what his ancestors benefited from; the work of the slaves they owned. Unfortunately the success and top dog mentality has not seemed to dissolve over time. Now we're dealing with systematic racism. We're dealing with people quietly trying to silence black people. We're dealing with people making sure that African Americans don't succeed. We're dealing with judges getting a cut from sending young black men to jail for non-violent crimes while white people walk away spotless for the same offense. Honestly, there are too many ways to even number or name the way America is working against African Americans. It's exhausting. 

I hate to generalize because there are a lot of good people in this world. There are a lot of outstanding citizens doing everything and anything in their power to fight for black people and they are white. Unfortunately those white people are still the beneficiaries of white privilege. There are also a lot of white people in this country with problems of micro-aggression and would prefer we live in times of slavery. A lot of those people are voting for Trump.

My current stance on being African American in America is that I am tired but I'm hopeful and I'm trying not to give up. I am also done taking bullshit. Just like every other young African American girl in America when Beyonce took the stage at the Superbowl and dropped not so subtle hints about how fucking awesome it is to be black and how she's proud made me proud. Obviously that didn't sit right with a lot of America. And I think we saw it.

We got to see the micro-aggressive behavior people have against us. The ignorance of not knowing African American history. Or just being misinformed. For example the negative connotation that the black panther party has. The only party in America that was fight for African Americans to make sure they got health care, education, food, and things to LIVE. They were HELPFUL. But they were shut down by the government. But they KKK is still running around.