You know what’s nice?
Taking your wallet to the ATM, fucking his account, and then letting him thank you by cleaning the tread of your boots.
10/10 would reccommend this holiday season. Very festive.
You know what's also nice? Diving in with your face between the boot and the carpet over and over, lying prone before @maxtem19 to get a better angle, since he hasn't moved his foot to let you get the back half of the sole and you know you're expected to clean the whole sole. Getting a tongue full of carpet fiber half the time and doing it over and over anyway, harder and further and more recklessly every time until your face is flush with the obscene and intoxicating absurdity of it all.
Then settling in to take care of the welt and toe and vamp and laces and tongue of the boot, twice for good measure, using your spit-soaked beard to polish it all up real nice for Boss.
Then doing it all again on the other boot until Boss decides to turn you over and use your chest as a footstool. Lying there knowing that he posted something to Tumblr but not sure exactly what, since you heard your phone message notifications going off 45 minutes ago from the pocket of your folded jeans next to the front door.
10/10 Recommended. Best early Christmas gift I've ever gotten.
Thank you, Boss. I can't wait to do it again someday.
