we're all stories in the end

fighting for my Fucking life trying to click the play button on 123movies

I hate when people call randomly… like if you’re not the love of my life or my mother, please text to schedule an appointment first.

seeing mutuals in my notes like yes...i'm entertaining the besties

Oh to be an older brother in a disney channel original movie and have caution tape on my bedroom door and call my younger sibling a dweeb

tumblr is my scrapbook, i find something pretty i want to look at later and i glue it to a page . like yesssss you are my little memory forever to look at lovingly

Hey hey hey if vampires are like allergic to religious objects. Does it only apply to things relevant to them personally. Like how does that work. Does their god specifically abandon them or do they all just go "yeah fuck this guy" I wanna know what happens when a vampire wasn't christian

Going on a vampire hunt with no prior knowledge of the vampires religious affiliation so you just take one of those "coexist " stickers to cover your bases

ancient vampire characters who pursue teenagers like.... romantically... you are absolutely swagless. die

i don't care if she looks like your dead wife if she's worried about what she'll wear to prom and you personally remember the louisiana purchase what common ground could you possibly have i am going to stake you

after analyzing every possible chess game using a quantum computer we have determined that the optimal strategy is to move the horseys around. this is literally unbeatable

Yes this character is evil but have you considered that the song that plays while they commit atrocities is a fucking banger

i love tumblr so much its like a journal except worse bc i wouldnt bother opening my actual journal to write down ‘theres a bug stuck in my blinds #girlboss’ but i will most definitely click on a new post button on tumblr and do that

remember twilight and how edward and bella couldn’t do it bc edward was afraid he’d fuck her to death?

i remember bella willing to die for the dick

me looking in the mirror: what’s up you anxious bisexual fuck