pix

feel so disconnected from everything in my life

really tired

dont feel totally depressed rn but i also dont feel happy. sorta just empty and scared

ooough

saii is so grounding. i think im in my head making myself cry all the time and then saii speaks and its like oh yeah theres more than sludge

i think theres a lot wrong with me and it scares me that i cant quite pin point it all

the worst part honestly is that my mother today was like you cant handle all of this at once and i got so frustrated cause i hate being doubted and now here i am and im so sad and i hate that shes right and i fucking wish i was better than what she thinks of me

everything is fine im a god

im so envious of people who can spend their teens and 20s not worrying about rent or phone bills or buying ur own groceries im so tired im so tired

deeeeep breathing. i have to lock in and do homework now

im so tired