N E E N S

Living your life and then suddenly you remember that Dan and Phil are going on tour and are gonna sing an original musical number about hard launching and being the happiest they’ve ever been oh I’m not gonna make it

remember on the radio when phil said babies always cry when they see him and dan, the dumb fucking sweetheart, was like well i wouldn't cry . if i was a baby and i looked at you .. girl u are so cute. what the fuck are you talking about

consider three apples. now consider what "three" means in the absence of any apples, a three totally divorced from quantity. and consider that when you aren't looking, the numbers fuck each other

do u think the death of harambe in 2016 pushed ilya over the edge. svetlana flew back from russia when she received a text from ilya saying “why do the innocent suffer” after the harambe news broke and she thought he was gonna off himself

ilya’s a dramatic texter always. he texts marly “we must be gone to be truly appreciated” out the blue and marly has to drive to Ilya’s apartment in the middle of the night to find ilya watching a fucking documentary on sardine migration and how climate change is effecting fishermen’s catches and ruining their livelihoods and marly just cracks open a coke and sits close next to ilya and finishes the documentary with him because he loves him despite his dramatic ass

Shane working on verbally complimenting Ilya more, expressing the appreciation he's alway thinking but rarely saying. He sets a little vibration alarm to go off on his smart watch every two hours. When it goes off he tries not to overthink and just says the first thought that comes to mind. Ilya is too busy to notice, feeling extremely gooey from Shane turning to him and in an earnestly serious voice saying things like "I love your smile" or "I married a fucking sniper boys" or "your new haircut is really fucking hot" or "you were a fucking beautician on that powerplay Roz."

ilya learns the word queerbaiting on twt and accuses shane of it every time he won't kiss/cuddle/be gross w him. and he knows shane will never say it back bc he's too scared to say the word queer

"hollander" (this doesn't have to change, we can go back, we can just be hollander and rozanov and ignore the strings, we can pretend it's nothing more and never talk about it and I'll never say shane again, I'll never ask for more if this is all i can get) "hollander" (there's nothing I can say to keep this from crumbling but i'm begging you)