she said smüdeez!

diane: yeah, but every time i come back here, they–

Feminutcase Hates Hippopopalous!

Equine “biographer” and feminist slag Diane Nguyen has hitched her pussywagon to the backs of colts like Secretariat and BoJack Horseman in order to make a name for herself, and now her pussywagon’s itching for a hitching to a horse of a different color: a horse-popotamus! Old Dry-ane is dragging our beloved Uncle Hanky’s name through the mud to get airtime for herself and her bull-hating agenda.

Transcript of the back of Secretariat: a Life, written by Diane Nguyen:

Diane Nguyen was born in Boston. Then she attended Boston University and majored in Literature and Equine Studies. In preparation for this book, Diane spent three years conducting research and interviews to bring to light the saga of Secretariat. Previous works include The Rise and Fall of Strongheart and the New York Times bestseller, Training Zippo Pine Bar.

Diane currently lives in Los Angeles with a dog.

“Nuanced, dark, and triumphant, Nguyen’s Secretariat: a Life lays bare the before-hidden struggles and impetus behind Secretariat’s record breaking success.” The New Yorkie Times

“In Secretariat: a Life, Nguyen paints a vivid portrait of one of the greatest thoroughbreds of all time. From interviews with Secretariat’s family, managers, and lovers we see a side of the legend until now left unseen. Never again will you look at Secretariat the same.” USA Toady

bojack kind of ‘pranks’ bradley hitler-smythe twice in the opening credits of horsin’ around. not to get too freudian, but… i feel like it’s possible that bojack treats the men in his life much worse than he treats the women in it. he can form civil friendships with diane and princess caroline, but he can only recall one day (june 14th, bastille day) when he ever “forgot to tell todd how annoying he is,” and like… we all know how he treats mr. peanutbutter. plus, there’s the whole thing where he slept with bradley’s mom. oh, jeez, and herb, obviously. 

in s2e2: yesterdayland, bojack and wanda visit a 1950s-style diner. the songs available on their table’s wall-o-matic are:

big joe turner: snake rattle and roll

jerry lee labrador: great barks of fire

dinah washington: what a difference a deer makes

woodchuck berry: my ding-a-ling

elvis presley: heartbreak hotel for dogs

richie valens: la bambi

bobby darin: macaque the knife