👁👄👁

if cockroaches were sentient potato chips I would not hesitate to pick them up and crunch on them 

“gO mAkE a SaNdWiCh” I will make you a sandwich, a very nice sandwich, with a little touch of blunt trauma, and mayo, lots and lots of fucking mayo, the entire bottle of mayo, then I will add wet soppy cabbage to the sandwich, add some very cold ham, freezing cold ham, so cold it hasn’t even thawed yet. And I will make the sandwich with only the end slices of the bread. I will serve it up, on your mother’s cold dead body.

i am now convinced my brain at 2 am has the intelect of a slice of ham, I love it

Both

Good answer.

YOU WILL

@smol-evil-gremlin you got so fucking lucky

I was doing fanart for my sister’s birthday. So I have about twenty that I was using for reference.

BUT I DON'T WANT TO MARRY DRACULA!

UMF yeah that’s unfortunate art

Reminder not to buy apple products, fuck apple :)

I will pour gasoline down your throat and then light it, and each and every time you gag on the fumes, you will only feed the fire more air, speeding it up more, and as your lungs are dissolved by the corrosive agents of the gasoline, you will debate whether it’s better to burn from the inside out, or to suffocate and let the sweet embrace of unconsciousness engulf you, but before that happens I will slit your wrists with pieces of construction paper and proceed to pour hand sanitizer on it, not because it hurts, but because i hope it will wash away the filth you have corrupted yourself with by making this post. @biggest-gaudiest-patronuses

jesus fuck calm the fuck down Satan, even Satan wouldn’t do this

shout out to people who DONT hurt my feelings

ok worm

You're my greatest enemy. I will add a single grain of sand to your room every day until you succumb to the desert.

Love you puki, thank you for making me laugh and smile. I don't know how often you hear this, but thank you.

You're my best friend. I will add a single grain of sand to your room every day until you succumb to the desert.

Puki, I will grind up your kneecaps and snort it like coke platonically

Just checked my resting heart rate, got a high score!

Gaud I don’t think that’s healthy

hehe squishy gaud