Jack from Online

Some days I feel like I’m 29 feet away from a Japanese radish

victor hugo was out of paris when his beloved novel les misérables was first published, so he telegraphed his publisher “?” to inquire about the book’s reception, to which his publisher promptly responded, “i still think you should have made inspector javert an elf girl”

Reddit is one of the last standing bastions of authentic internet information but it’s also overrun with the type of hyper-competitive bastard with a kink for humble-bragging, so sometimes you need to read information and work through an extra layer of critical thinking to assess if it’s genuine or if it’s someone being an obtuse asshole on purpose

Saw someone calling a 60 second 400m dash “pretty good for an untrained runner” and I was mad the whole bus ride home

That’s a 15 mile per hour pace if you were wondering. That’s the pace for finishing a mile in 4 minutes. They’d ban you from school zones at that speed

Reddit user sonicthedgehog logging in for another productive day of being the most helpful contributor on r/running

keep your friends close and your lord of the rings extended editions closer

maybe i like my tech a little bit inconvenient

maybe i like pulling out my debit card instead of using apple pay. maybe i like untangling my wired headphones. maybe i like typing something into the search bar instead of using siri or whatever. maybe i like curating my own social media feeds over an algorithm. i just don’t think everything has to be perfectly streamlined and efficient i like it when things feel tethered to the real world.

The concept of modern AU Jaime Lannister is too absurd to exist with any fidelity. What if LeBron James killed the president and then kept on hooping for fifteen years?

"rickrolling is mean" rickrolling is the gentle, kind, prosocial descendant of what we used to do on the internet, which was putting a redirect to goatse in every possible misspelling of a url

Official ominous sign

I've now seen two different deltarune theory videos that describe gaster's theme as having an interval of seven semitones and then pointing out other music that uses that same interval to assess how likely it is that it's a deliberate reference to gaster's theme but without at any point clarifying that an interval of seven semitones is more commonly known as a "perfect fifth" and is actually the second most universal interval in all of music after the octave and it's actually harder to find music that doesn't contain any perfect fifths than music that does

it's such an irresponsible writing decision you know. perfect fifths are one of the first things you learn about if you study music theory for any amount of time. referring to it by the width of the interval in half steps instead of by its more common name makes it sound more mysterious and special than it actually is. it's leading an audience who doesn't know anything about music theory except a vague understanding of the word "leitmotif" to think "yeah, why would both of these tracks have a melody with two consecutive notes separated by exactly seven semitones if one isn't meant to be a reference to the other?" even though that question has a really obvious answer that anyone who knows anything about music theory should be able to explain

calling perfect fifths a motif is like calling "uses words with the letter 'e' in them" a typing quirk