Smoke and Sonder

because those kind green eyes still my roiling soul.

Maybe, just this once, I am enough.

(but how can you catch someone who’s already on the ground?)

thank you so much!!! It always makes my day to hear that. Your work is awesome as well, been looking through it. If you see @smokeandramblings reblogging your work, that's me!

(Inspiration for “crow”: the Aesop’s fable about a thirsty crow feeding stones into a jar to reach the water at the bottom, whose moral is “Necessity is the mother of invention.”)

I will steady you in my arms.

I'd scatter bite-sized love poems under your feet, like a trail of breadcrumbs back to my embrace.

you make my life brighter than a streelight at 3 AM, something sweet enough to make my teeth ache

to the god of light in darkness and of broken, damaged things.

There's something thing they don't tell you about funerals is that after all is said and done when the cake has been eaten and the wine has been drunk and the tears have slipped down your shoulders as everyone else cries for your loss they dont tell you that when everyone else gets to walk away you become your own funeral procession; you get to carry the hearse alone

has flickered into darkness and begun to smoke

Do not ask me to mend what is still shifting, while I still wake up each morning to clumps of golden hair and flaking pieces of my mind stuck to a pillowcase

"How high must you be?" As high as it takes. to chase away memories choking my brain "How are you coping?" As high as it takes. to smother the hurt turning to hate. "Are you ok?" As high as it takes. to piece back a heart that no longer can break.

My father, my best friend, passed away three days ago. I am 19. He will never see me graduate from college, never walk me down the aisle, never meet my children. I spent the first two days in a drunken stupor. Now all I have left is this. My most sincere apologies for the poetry that is going to be on this blog in the coming days, weeks, months, years that it takes me to overcome this loss.