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Breed, grow, breed. Every inch of the earth not devoted to humanity is an inch wasted.

As social media fries the brains of generation after generation, the world is only going to get dumber and dumber. When the world gets dumber, impulse control goes away. Low impulse control means more and more big bellies. The future is dumb and pregnant. Embrace it.

Rachel walled slowly through her back patio, careful to step over the broken bottles, crushed cans and other garbage that was the remnants of last night's party. With her first calorie packed drink of the day in hand, the 25 year old mother of 8 decided cleaning up would be too much work, and plopped down in the nearest chair. Rachels stomach was packed to the brim as a result of her latest binge, and a dull ache spread outwards from her distended abdomen. As one of her twins kicked into her stomach, Rachel let out a soft, low belch. She was a greedy breeder, and proud of it.