うつ病

I still remember the sound. The only things that were loud enough to break the silence was the blood in my ears and the rain. It felt like weeks, but it probably was only a few hours. I'm unsure at what time my brain finally registered other sounds. I remember everyone leaving the ceremony, and we sat, just the two of us, not a word spoken for hours. The owners never kicked us out. Around 11pm, the old man shared a bottle of whiskey with us wordlessly. He left the rest of the bottle and went home at midnight. The first time we spoke a full sentence that night had to be at least 2am. We talked about how nice the headstone was. It was all we could get out. When I finally got to my room again, I just laid on the floor in my ruined suit. Now some days, I'll catch myself standing in the rain. The only thing louder then grief is blood and rain.

Took another loss, but that shit ain't nothing new. This is not a mood, it's a different kind of blue.

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