sleepless suggestions

It's humid tonight. There's a storm outside and my bedroom feels damp and cold. I lay on my side, picturing you laying there, facing me. I cup your chin in my hand and I smile - your eyes light up in delight. You are sexy in a way I can't seem to explain. Maybe if I could study you up close I'd understand.

concept: you and me finally get some quiet time to ourselves. we chat all night, about life, the universe, and make all of our witty but awkward jokes. your eyes are sparkling. we hold hands and cuddle. we feel happy falling asleep together.

If you want to think about them, you can. Surrender. It's good for you to love. To feel. No matter if it hurts the next morning, tonight let yourself be head-over-heels, knees-weak, butterflies, melting-butter in love.

you can let go now. it's okay to rest. it's okay to let your mind wander. it's okay to think nothing at all. you can let go.

concept: you're learning how to soothe yourself. you breathe easier. your shoulders aren't as heavy. you panic less and smile more. you're still sensitive but you're learning to be calm on your own.

you can lay down and rest without having anything to do. you don't need your cell phone, the TV or a book. just be. stare out the window. look at the ceiling. close your eyes. what do you see?

concept: you're no longer holding on to the things and people who hurt you. you are free from their toxicity. you accept what is no longer good for you and leave it behind. you feel good about yourself.

you're the only person who actually gives me the time of day

please stop pretending that they're going to come back

you can tell me all of your filthy secrets, I’m a sucker for dirt like that

I mentally cheat on the people I make love to by imagining they are you

You've made me into a starving whore and that's more than just a metaphor

I swear I can hear your voice in the rain. I see you smiling with someone else and I am not on your mind

I still think of you when I touch myself