nothing special

to lovely humans who were excluded from invitations, left behind when they tied their shoes, forced to walk in the grass when the sidewalk was full, spoken over when you tried to contribute, whispered about or laughed at, given the side eye when you tried to fit in... you are so worthy of love and I’m sorry people have convinced you otherwise. I promise that your people are out there - people who will see the side of you others ignore, people who share weird inside jokes with you, give you affectionate nicknames and go to museums or roadtrips with you and fulfil whatever idea of friendship you’ve always fantasized about. even if you feel like an empty shell of your former self because you’ve hidden yourself away due to shame, this exterior will melt when you accept yourself or let people in and you’ll realize there was nothing wrong with you all along. you have interesting things to say, you deserve new chances and beginnings, your heart is probably made of gold because you know what it’s like to be left out in the cold, and you have so much to give. you are so worthy and someone’s idea of a friend too, and I hope you receive lots of hugs in the future from yourself and others because you’re so lovable.

no but really wouldn’t it be great to look in the mirror and feel absolutely nothing? to have no reaction to what you’re seeing? i’m beautiful, i’m ugly, i’m this and that like what if you just looked in the mirror and thought ‘’this is what i look like. okay, now i’m gonna go brush my teeth, get dressed up and do my errands’’ like imagine that being your life 24/7. i would give the entire world for that amount of indifference. that’s freedom to me honestly