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Yeah, so this was posted by “Change the Ref” which means this was created by the parents of Joaquin Oliver, who died during the Parkland shooting. Since then, they have done many powerful, heart wrenching pieces like this. They tricked NRA members into giving a graduation speech in front of empty chairs, each chair representing a child lost to gun violence. They used AI to make a video of their own dead son talking about how he died of gun violence. Joaquin once wrote an essay for school regarding gun violence and they hand delivered that essay to an NRA endorsed politician. They made 3D printed statues of Joaquin as well.
I have a lot of respect for what they do, but their raw grief and anger is clear in every single piece. I can’t imagine what they’re going through, but I hope they are able to find peace someday…
This is so beautiful. We need more cards like these-
I just don’t understand the thought behind school shooters, though. I just don’t.
Like- imagine dropping your kid off at school then going to pick your kid up, only to get a call that they got shot by some freaking sicko.
Like bitch and moan all you want saying “tHey hAve bAd MenTal HeAlth! ThEyreFoRe iTs oKay!” Like. Uhhh. No it’s not. The mental health issues maybe a reason behind the shooting, but like HELL is it an excuse.
Like- how DARE you have the audacity to shoot at someone kid- potentially killing them.
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I hate when people play phone audio out loud in public spaces. The screechy quality of phone speakers, the disregard for literally anyone's auditory comfort, my poor autistic ears — I rage mode.
I know I'm not alone, so I am going to share my flawless embarrassment-free technique to get them to stop.
1) Carry a pair of earbuds on you. Not required, but it helps give you the confidence to actually confront them
2) walk up to them and be as nice as possible, no matter how mad you are. However, do not explain yourself or apologize, just make a simple request: "Hi, would you mind using earbuds for that?" (You're not asking them to stop, just change their method)
3a) 90% of the time they will shamefully put their phone away, and because you were so nice, they aren't even mad at you!! Then you can thank them for being so thoughtful, and maybe compliment their shirt or something! Everybody loves compliments.
3b) Alternatively, they might say, "I don't have earbuds." Normally, this would put you in an awkward situation, but You aren't normal. You are Prepared.
OFFER THE EARBUDS: "That's okay," you say, "you can borrow mine!" dazzling smile, you are so nice and thoughtful, what a great guy you are
Don't worry about losing your earbuds (or if you don't actually have earbuds), because they won't accept your offer. THEN they will put their phone away of their own free will. You never even had to ask.
If you want a detailed explanation of why this works (for the autistic besties, I see u):
People don't like it when you tell them what to do, especially if that request is to stop doing their activity in any shape or form. It pisses them off, and rightfully so! No one wants to be controlled.
That's why this method is so good: you never asked them to stop their activity, you asked them to make a small change to how they are doing the activity, which is far less obtrusive.
This works for lots of things, and lots of people. Imagine being a kid, goofing around, and someone says, "Stop doing that." Upsetting! Compared to: "Would you mind being quieter?" Because really, the issue is not that you are goofing around, the issue is that you are being loud and disruptive about it.
Same goes for the stranger on their phone in public. It's totally fine that they're watching a video, the problem is that they're being disruptive, and chances are they know that being disruptive is rude.
The second half of why this works is offering the earbuds.
When you ask them to change how they're doing their activity, you are placing a burden on them. If they have a pair already, it is a very tiny burden. If they don't have a pair, it is suddenly an insurmountable burden, and that's very uncomfortable. In fact, it's so uncomfortable that by making the request, you might become the bad guy in the situation (according to them) even if you're being nice, and even if they're in the wrong.
That's why you offer the earbuds. Now you are actively helping them by alleviating the burden. You are being kind and thoughtful instead of demanding!
Sure, they might think you're a little weird, because it's not part of the social script, but they've got no ground to be mad at you.
Which brings up the last point: offering to lend your earbuds isn't part of the social script. It's surprising, and so their default reaction is to avoid that path: they will decline your offer. So, you don't have to worry about a stranger wearing your earbuds with their gross stranger ears.
So that's the whole idea behind the method. Confrontation that is respectful and thoughtful of their autonomy and your comfort all at the same time. ~social engineering for good~
It's finally done! Finished a new one this week. 🤗 I made this as a farewell gift for some family members (that I will give this to once it's framed) and also because I wanted to practice painting more sunset beaches.
Most of my inspiration for this piece came from seeing [ this gorgeous image ] online and wanting to try my hand at remaking it.
Throughout the process, I started to worry that it wasn't looking good, but I kept going, and ultimately decided it was easier to just do my own thing (which I know I need to get better at). Still have to figure out what my own style is, but, I think I'm getting there.
Somewhat.
Probably.
.... Maybe?
Overall, I think it looks good! I think I made a decent improvement on the water (especially since this was my first time doing waves), and I'm proud of how I painted the rocks on the shore.
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