Sinful Neverland

“Bath Time” drawn by Abigail Larson

“ you can stay here, if you'd like. “

“ please don't go. “

“ why don't we stay at your place tonight? “

“ can i get you anything? “

“ let's be pathetic together. “

“ are you crying? “

“ i'm glad that you're here. “

“ you're not doing this alone. “

“ i don't have anyone anymore. “ “ you have me. “

“ are you sure [about staying]? “

“ you didn't force me. i volunteered [to be here], remember? “

“ you are what’s important right now. “

“ it’s okay, you know. if you need to vent. “

“ are you sure? it's quite heavy [of a topic]. “ “ i've got all night. “

“ tonight is about you. you can make it up to me some other time. “

“ i've got nowhere else to be. “

“ you said you needed a distraction. “ “ so... where is it? “ “ you're looking right at it. “

“ why don't you come here for a second? “

“ wanna talk about it? “

“ i can't talk about it. not tonight. “

“ you need to distract me. do something, anything. “

“ i just don't want to be alone tonight. “

“ i'm tired of thinking. let's just... make out, or something “

“ i feel like shit. “ “ you look like it, too. “ “ hey! “

“ it’s okay to cry, you know. “

“ you’re a little hurt, that’s all. “

“ anything you want me to get you? “

“ nothing a good [drink] can't fix. “

“ let’s get you cleaned up. “

“ this is you thinking rationally? “

“ you're really all i've got. “

“ c'mere. let me give you a hug. “

“ and you're absolutely sure this is what you need? “

“ you don't need this right now. “

“ how long are you gonna sit there? “ “ all night, if that's what it takes. “

“ what's it gonna take to make you smile? “

“ if you're not ready to talk about it, let's not talk about it. “

“ wanna play some mario kart? it'll give us both a reason to cry when you beat me. “

“ how about we stay like this, holding each other? “

“ i don’t know what’s wrong with me. “

“ i can’t stop crying. “ “ i'll be strong for the both of us. “

“ i didn’t know where else to go. “

“ the door's always open, you know that. “

“ i thought you were leaving town. “ “ i can't leave now. “

“ there's that smile i know and love... “

“ stay with me. “

“ hey, what’s your favorite snack? “

“ i’m not leaving. “

“ just let it out. “

“ you're stronger than you think. “

“ how about i make a quick run to the store, get you some aspirin? “

“ grab a burger or something on your way home. “

“ you were always there when i needed you. let me repay the favor. “

“ i don't mean to bother you. “ “ you're not. “

“ hey, listen to me... “

“ you’re not a burden. “

“ aren’t you tired? “ “ this isn't about me. “

“ you’re going to be okay. “

“ hey, look at me… “

“ i don’t know what to do. “ “ we’ll figure it out. “

“ you’re not alone. “

Pedro wrote a little card to me at the end, saying, ‘How interesting that something so huge and life-changing should happen so early in your life and so late in mine.‘ 

She told him to wait a moment, slipping into the kitchen to make him some coffee and coming back in the hopes the steaming liquid would sober him up somewhat. Setting it on the coffee table before settling back on her knees.

Tomorrow would be the fifth anniversary of their death and every year he ended up binging for a few days and ignoring everyone's texts and phone calls, but the team expected it now so they all tried to help however they could.

His voice was rough, the edges of his words cracking as he tried to bury the pain, hiding it from her as he always did. She could see it even on a good day, could see the horrors of his past haunting him in his eyes, the pain always there, lingering as he put on a front. Smiling for the world, and convincing himself that he was fine. He wasn't. He didn't need to be...

❛  you look absolutely beautiful/handsome today.  ❜ ❛  i love you more than words can say.  ❜ ❛  i will always be here for you.  ❜ ❛  you are the most important person in my life.  ❜ ❛  i promise to never let you down.  ❜ ❛  come on, let’s get you back to bed.  ❜ ❛  i’m gonna kiss it all better.  ❜ ❛  you’re just like a big cuddly teddy bear.  ❜ ❛  have i ever told you what a beautiful smile you have?  ❜ ❛  shut up and kiss me already.  ❜ ❛  here, i brought you your favorites.  ❜ ❛  just relax and let me take care of everything else.  ❜ ❛  this color really brings out your eyes.  ❜ ❛  will you stay here with me please?  ❜ ❛  do you mind if i use you as a pillow?  ❜ ❛  stop hogging the blanket!  ❜ ❛  i thought you said you wanted to help me with dinner.  ❜ ❛  honey, i’m home!  ❜ ❛  i saw this at the store and thought it would be perfect for you.  ❜ ❛  did i ever tell you how much i love you?  ❜ ❛  you are worth fighting for.  ❜ ❛  i feel like i’m finally where i belong.  ❜ ❛  we should just ditch them and have a night to ourselves.  ❜ ❛  please stay here, i’ve only just started to warm up a little.  ❜ ❛  do you want to go out on a date with me?  ❜ ❛  this right here is why your are my favorite person.  ❜ ❛  you’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this.  ❜ ❛  i prepared breakfast for us.  ❜ ❛  keep it. it looks better on you anyway.  ❜ ❛  go back to sleep. i promise i’ll be there when you wake up.  ❜ ❛  you mean a lot to me.  ❜ ❛  remember we have some plans for later.  ❜ ❛  is it okay if i hold your hand?  ❜ ❛  do you want to stay the night?  ❜ ❛  i think i could live without you … but i don’t want to. i don’t ever want to.  ❜ ❛  only you can make me feel this way.  ❜ ❛  we should just stay in bed today.  ❜ ❛  i’ll come running whenever you need me.  ❜ ❛  you are perfect to me.  ❜ ❛  i think i might need some snuggle time.  ❜

I don’t care when or if you reply to me. I write to develop a character that I adore. I write for ideas. I write for a lot of reasons but none of those are to do with you. I write for myself. 

I care about you as a person not as a character. Sure, there is a moment when we first start writing where that line blurs and you are your character for a hot second. But that’s more fun and less bothersome- plus it only lasts until we start talking out of character or in the tags. 

I don’t care about what we do on Tumblr NEARLY AS MUCH as I care about YOU so if you’re not feeling a reply? Fuck it. Don’t reply to it. Ever. We can always do another one, it’s fine. I’m gonna save my reply cause I worked on that and am proud of it but- whether or not you reply is not my concern. Because you have things going on that need taking care of. Because you have a life and health concerns and fucking crazy world issues that are going on, I get it. 

His lips quirk lopsided to her pealing laugh and playful wink. Cole sets the game onto the recently cleared countertops, begins to unload and stack cans next to it. Aluminum rims clink on top of each other. It's a clean noise. Like rain. He sets a rhythm.

"I reckon you're repayin' it just fine," he smiles and raises the last of the straggling cans from his bag between forefinger and thumb. He waggles it and his lips begin to angle, "Awful kind of you t'keep hostin' a no-good raider around. Heard they were dangerous folk. I reckon y'should keep an eye out." Jest cut with an obscured and sincere concern. It's a shitty habit he can't seem to kick.

He sets the can down, zips up the canvas bag, and slings the rabbits back over his shoulder. Momentum carries them into a full arcing swing across his back. "Hopefully the weather keeps up," his eyes flit back to the pallid world framed by the windows, "Heard a few folks froze up a few years back. Wasn't 'round here, but the storm came in sudden. Didn't have time t'make it to shelter."

The sound of coffee has him perking up like a dog whose attention is caught by the rattle of treats in a cardboard box. His footsteps following after hers are a sluggish, disfigured echo, heavier and without as much grace. He huffs light-heartedly, "You're spoilin' me, your knightness."

He off-loads the rabbits once more, on their designated countertop where they usually handle game. He slides behind her, reaches up, and hooks his fingers along the handles. Enamel brushes audibly against wood as extricates the mugs. He peers down at her, amused.

She didn't know what to call it, what it was, what they were, but she hung on his every word. Waited for him to return to her whenever he left, wouldn't change whatever they had for the world. "mmm yes, it's a terrible habit of mine, I just can't seem to turn away the strays." Her smile reached her eyes as she winked at him, that twinkle only he seemed to elicit never diminishing in it's shine. "I should keep an eye out, shouldn't I?" An eye trained on him, easy to do, with how damn handsome he was.

It was easy to make him happy, the smell of coffee alone enough to have him following her into the kitchen. She liked that about him, the way he spoke to her, the deep baritone echoing in the small cabin. Barely enough for her, let alone him, and yet his presence comforted her, she liked the way it felt when he crowded the space. "You know what? You can bite me." She remarked, his humouring her with the nickname leaving her shaking her head, a soft laugh falling from her lips.

He was almost back to Jackson when he heard a noise. It turned out to be just a deer, who was startled by Joel and his horse and ran off. Joel frowned a bit, that would give him some meat and pelt but he had so much already; maybe later he’d come back out to search for the deer.

Joel turns his horse toward the direction of the gate and pulls on the reigns to stop the animal when he hears a scream coming from the opposite direction. He lightly squeezes the horse’s sides and grips the reigns tightly as the horse rides off in the direction of the screams.

“Hey!” Joel shouts, jumping off of his horse once it comes to a stop. He removes his gun from his back and fires off a shot, missing the raider but startling him enough that he lets go of Willow. Joel fires off a second shot and this time hits the raider inbetween the eyes. He shoulder’s his rifle and hurries over to Willow.

"Joel!" His name tore from her lips, echoing in the clearing around them as a sob escaped her. She tried to reach out for him, but her small body was crushed against the tree, the raiders grip too vice-like to allow room to move. Until his attention was averted, a warning shot just close enough for the raider to drop her like she was nothing, crumpling to a heap at the base of the tree before he rounded on Joel.

Panic welled in her chest as she tried to reach out for him, scrambling towards him as if she could somehow get between the Raider and Joel, as if she could protect him in some way. The Raider was big, but Joel was fast. His aim true, lead sinking between the Raider's eyes as he dropped to the snow, a flurry of flakes swirling in the air, disturbed by the presence of his now unmoving body. Her lip split, cheek torn and bruised, the headwound making her dizzy. It wasn't until she tried to suck in a breath that she realized at least one of her ribs were cracked.