reflection;

Ally had spent a lot of her life thinking about what it might be to be in her sister’s shoes. She was so proud of her, so enthralled by her strength, the courage it took to make all those decisions. She shook her head, feeling relaxed now that she felt like things were at least not as tense between her and Silas.

“Silas, it’s not a bother,” she offered him a gentle smile and shook her head. “I don’t…want to be hostile anymore. I don’t want to feel like that. I hated how I felt about you and how I still feel about you. But I’m not going to let it ruin my days anymore. We were really good friends. There’s no harm in being that again.”

“Aria has a lot of strength. I don’t think I have the smarts to do that honest. Like I’m smart, really smart, but I’m not intelligent in the way I should be to be a leader. All the politics. I just want to be happy one day with the person I love.”

A smile came to his lips. He had always loved this about the girl, how positive and radiant she could be about others, always seeing the good about them and always looking on the brighter end of things. She had a lovely future planned out, one that Silas couldn’t help but feel just a quick flash of jealousy at the idea of Allegra settling down with someone she loved - someone other than him. Breakups were always messy, even more so when things didn’t feel truly over. Things never did feel truly over between them, at least not in his eyes. Feelings were still lingering and it was hard to consider someone you had never gotten over - maybe never would get over - a distant ex. 

“I don’t really understand politics. Never have. Kind of glad I’m not a royal, you know? Don’t really have to deal with that stuff ever...” That wasn’t completely true. His father knew enough about politics, being somewhat of a political player himself within the military, and his mother, well she had played and won the game before. So maybe he was just the odd one out. 

“Did you want to get some ice cream? You know, maybe take a break...get out of here for a bit?”

The conversation was louder than he wanted it to be, but frustration was getting the best of him as Silas continued his walk through campus, cell phone close to his ear until finally stopping. He had figured it was a good place to stop, away from everyone where he could have something of a private conversation, though that didn’t seem likely as he let out another groan. 

“Yes, I know that you and dad have expectations and I’m doing the best I can. Not being top of the classes isn’t failing though, be reasonable.”

He couldn’t really say he was surprised. Coming from parents such as his, two such extraordinary people, it was sometimes difficult to really rise up to their standards. In fact, that was a bar that Silas felt he was constantly falling short of, though pointing it out wasn’t going to help any, he was certain. So instead he just continued pleading until finally the conversation ended. With an exasperated sigh, the boy turned around to realize that he wasn’t in fact as alone as he had thought. 

“Hey...um...so, this is embarrassing.” @arlomerlin​

So far break had been pretty nice. Elle had gotten to do a little bit of prep for her upcoming classes, and had spent a decent amount of time at the library, sipping her tea and thumbing through various works on composers and genres of music. Her next semester was set to be a little lighter on astronomy and a little heavier on music and gen eds - the blessing of a double major.

She was just getting ready to leave the library that afternoon when, out of nowhere and maybe for the first time ever, she was recognized and called out to by an entirely unknown voice. Turning to try and click into place the identity of the person who the voice belonged to, Elle wasn’t coming up with a name as she listened to the male launch immediately into what he needed.

Right. She was on the school website for more than just socializing.

“Uh… yeah, that sounds great,” she started cautiously. Mother had always said be cautious around strangers, and even though she was in Auradon, Elle occasionally found the teachings of her mother difficult to ignore. “Who are you, though?”

Okay, she didn’t know who he was. That was a bit of a minor setback, he had to admit, and a bit of a damage to his ego, but that could slide. At least for now it could slide. Silas did his best not to show his emotions right there on his face as he cleared his throat and offered the girl an easy smile. “Oh, yeah, I’m Silas, Silas Li? I’m on some of the school’s teams and in some clubs and I was just browsing and figured you all would want to know about some links that weren’t working, maybe? You...are part of the website crew, right?” 

That would be his luck though, approach someone in an effort to not have to approach his ex and then they wouldn’t even be involved with the issue at all. Still, he waited for a response, still offering her a smile. Maybe things didn’t really need to be fixed? Maybe the team already knew about the issues and they were working on fixing them and he wouldn’t have to meet with anyone else from the site at all? Wishful thinking, but hey, he had made wishes for weirder things before. 

Most nights these past few days had been exhausting. She was determined to help Lucy with her quest but life was getting more and more complicated by the minute. Sometimes she longed to go back to the castle and live at home in the comfort of those warm walls, watching the clouds pass by while she dreamt of the future. But not it wasn’t that easy, was it? College was certainly proving to be much more exciting than she had could ever thought it would be. Silas, well he definitely played a large part of that. The dance had completely resurfaced all those feelings she was doing a perfectly terrible job at hiding.

“Not really. I slept fine, thanks for asking.” Ally offered him a soft smile, readjusting her hair tie. “I’m just doing a little light reading. Did you, um, want to join me? I’ve got plenty of table space. And Aria isn’t around so I promise she won’t come running over with Grandpa’s Trident to make you into a fish kabob.”

Everything inside of him wanted to jump at the invitation - an impulse that Silas was sure wasn’t a good thing. But, then again, she had said that Aria wasn’t around and really, didn’t that mean he was safe? As long as Allegra was the one to invite him to sit down and her big sister wasn’t going to bust out of nowhere and kill him, what was really the harm? So, despite his better knowledge, he let his book bag drop and pulled out a chair, sliding into it across from the girl. 

“I don’t want to bother you or anything. Just saw you and figured I would see how you were doing. There was a lot going on at that dance it seems, not sure if you were really following all of it.” He had never been much of a gossip, but when you had nothing else to do, it was pretty easy to keep your ear to the ground and pick up on a few loudly whispered conversations. “You’re probably glad that you’re not the oldest child, huh? Not having to deal with all the...social stuff.” A touchy subject, sure, but it was out of his mouth before he really had a chance to stop it. “Sorry I meant - just royals and family connections and expectations, you know?”

“Hey, Elle right? I wanted to ask some questions about the new site that’s going up for the school. Also there seem to be some issues that I figured I would let you know about so those can be fixed. Since I’m sure you guys don’t want links being broken or wrong or anything like that. Got a second?” @ellegothel​

It was only really because Aria was here that Ally had decided to come. The last ball hadn’t ended exactly the way she wanted it to, running into Silas and everything. She hoped today would be different, a chance for her to ignore her feelings instead of confront them, but there he was, standing only a few feet away. She held her breath in hopes that he wouldn’t come. Or maybe he would. It didn’t take long before he was beside her. God he always looked good dressed up.

“Thank you,” she said softly, brushing a stray piece of hair behind her ears. “I um, you look good too. You dress really good.” Ally dared to offer him a smile. It was winter. What was the harm in opening up a little bit.

“Thanks, I wasn’t really sure what to wear to this. I mean, I know people dress up, but I wasn’t actually sure what specific outfit to wear and how dressed up people would be. It’s good to know I wasn’t like totally off the mark or anything. Since, you know, knowing my luck I would actually dress up like expected and then people would be dressed down this year or something...like that...” 

He was rambling, he knew he was rambling, but Silas couldn’t really figure out how to stop it. He got a bit rambly when nervous and fuck was he nervous at the moment. He had planned this, practiced in the mirror even, but nothing really felt like it had been enough. For a moment he wanted to kick himself. He had been unprepared and yet he had thought it was a good idea to approach the girl, who surely thought he was even more of an idiot than before. 

Gesturing behind him, though Silas wasn’t entirely sure where as he didn’t really have anything to focus on behind him, Silas let out a nervous chuckle. “So I should um...get back there. Unless you wanted to...dance, maybe? It’s a dance and we’re not dancing and I’m pretty sure that’s...a crime or whatever. Can’t spend holidays in the slammer.”

ARIA: Are you serious?

ARIA: Just stay away!

ARIA: Let her pursue a friendship when and IF she's EVER ready for it!!

Andie: you know I'm just as hopeless with the whole relationship stuff, right?

Andie: Maybe worse cause you actually we're in one

Andie: I think it could if you're both willing to work at it and compromise

Silas: Yes, I'm aware of that. but I gotta rant to sOMEONE

Ally didn’t really think she owed him an explanation on her life choices, not after their less than amicable fallout. On her break she would text Aria in hopes of a little sisterly ice cream bonding after her shift today. “Fitz helped me get the job. I figured I should work on my people skills.” It was a purposeful jab, right in all the arguments they’d had, every fight, every straw that piled up and inevitably broke the camels back. “Since that’s something I need to do.” She wrote down what he’d ordered quickly. “Anything else you want?”

“That’s...good. I’m happy for you, really I am.” And he was, though Silas figured it wouldn’t actually mean much to her what he thought. As he was asked if there was anything else he wanted, Silas just gave a soft shake of the head. At this rate, he wasn’t even sure he wanted the things he had already ordered. “I’m glad you’re doing well.” It came out as barely more than a whisper and Silas had no desire to say it any louder. Not because he didn’t want Allegra to hear it, but rather it just felt hollow to do so. It was quite obvious that she was not happy with him being there and at the moment, even he wasn’t happy with him being there. “I um, I said that I wanted that to go, right?”

ARIA: Then maybe we were led to believe different things. But in any case, I'm not going to stop insisting that you stay away.

ARIA: Mmmm, but I think you are.

ARIA: We can agree to disagree all you want, but the moral of the story is stay away from my sister.

ARIA: Do you think I don't talk to my sister, Silas?

ARIA: GIVE HER SPACE

ARIA: LET HER SETTLE IN

ARIA: SHE IS A FRESHMAN

ARIA: She already has to figure out the whole college thing. Her ex-boyfriend creeping around every corner? Not helping.

SILAS: If you did then maybe you would see that she isn't as against seeing me as you seem to be for her seeing me.

RILEY: Your finger crossing worked because she loved it.

RILEY: I know, I wasn't expecting that many people. I think it was either because people love a halloween party, or because sneaking around in the Tri Delt house was kind of fun.

Ally: I don't know. Maybe we don't do anything.

ARIA: Why not? If you know someone doesn't want to see you for valid reasons, why not stay out of their path until they've indicated to you that you're allowed back in it?

ANDIE: Ah man

ANDIE: Why did you reach out in the first place. Isn't the point of breaking up to have ... distance and stuff?

ANDIE: Do you miss her?

SILAS: Because I make bad choices Andie! It's kinda my thing! Bad decisions and Silas Li going hand in hand. I know pronounce you man and his bad decisions of his life.

SILAS: Of course I miss her!

SILAS: What kinda question is that?? come on now!